Drunkandalone

Going on 6... But Im wondering what the hell am i going to do with myself im in my mid twenties and all my friends are at the bars. Is it worth it going sober now? When I have so much fun left to have?

Dee74

Is drinking really fun for you tho?

I think we all have that fear - all I can tell you is I still have fun, sober, I love my life and myself much more than I ever did when I was drinking.

I did need to change my life tho. I wish I had done it at 25 but I crashed and burned my way through life until my 40s.

D

James18

I wanted to stop drinking way before I actually even tried. I wish I had done it years ago. I'm sure I had fun some of the time while drinking, but can't remember most of it, so what was the point? I drank due to a lack of confidence/social anxiety, when what I should have been doing was dealing with my issues instead of plastering over the surface with booze. I've spent too many years of my life with people I didn't really like, or had "outgrown", doing things that made me feel bad in the long run...and all at the cost of having some kind of meaningful life I actually wanted. I was convinced I wouldn't find any new friends if I lost the ones I had so it carried on and carried on. Of course that wasn't true and you can always meet new people. It just takes a few forward steps.

If you're not going to be drinking with your friends, what do you want to be doing? This is an important question, it will help you stay sober if that's what you want.

in short, only can decide what you want to do, but don't waste your life doing things for other people or out of fear of being alone - both are bad reasons to base decisions on. Good luck, it sounds like you have some figuring out to do

tootsl1

We all manage to have fun with our friends as kids without alcohol, so there is no reason you cant enjoy life sober. It is all about choices. Like James, I wish to goodness I had given up when I first knew I had a problem, would have saved many wasted years and untried potential. Don't follow the herd, be your own person.

Drunkandalone

Well Im on Day 7. Ive been working out at the gym every day after work. Yesterday I saw my therapist and afterwards went to the bar.... And had three diet cokes and some chicken fingers. The bar clientele just didnt seem as entertaining sober. Went home watched a movie and went to bed. I havent been a week sober in about 6 years. I feel like a kid again. I no longer wake up dry heaving, or trembling or cranky or with this feeling of impending doom.

But im 27. I want to go out and kick up my heels with the boys and get a little bit tipsy to laugh and maybe go home with someone. Am I an alcoholic? At least for the past month ive been drinking until the point where I pass out veryday (went through a breakup). Before that though I was relatively okay at only having a few beers a day. I dont know that I want to be sober forever, but im willing to stick it out for one more week to see how I feel.

resolute50

"The bar clientele just didnt seem as entertaining sober"

That's because they aren't.
I visited my old hang out the first time I quit for 14 months.
Just drank a small glass of OJ and talked with a few people.Drunks are down right boring.
I can imagine I was a bore as well.
Today will be 25 days and I'm not looking back!

Found out during my absence that 2 locals that I used to whoop it up with died.
Both directly related to alcohol abuse.
Just a few month ago I heard that a fellow townie that I went to High School with commited suicide.He was in this establishment almost every day.Lost his wife,job and then his life.

You're just 27 y.o.,but it gets worse and worse as the years progress.

IOAA2

Hi. Probably the most important thing we must be to become sober is to be honest with ourselves. The results of that will be answers you seek. Like when does it happen that you stop drinking when you’re a LITTLE bit tipsy?

FBL

It all depends on if you really want to quit for good. I know there's no way in hell I was ready to quit at 27, not even 37, it took me until I was 43 and the physical dependence had set in but good. Morning shakes, crippling anxiety, paranoia, etc. I hope you don't wait until all of that happens to you, but you're the only one that can make that decision. I wish you the best.

misterritter

Eventually, you will probably want to have fun without drinking, and plenty of people can tell you its possible at any age. But, the longer we rely on drinks to provide fun, the harder it is to have fun without them. At least from all of my reading and listening, I believe this to be true.

Drunkandalone

The sad part about it is that I have been drinking like this since I was 18. So ive already experienced the morning shakes, crippling anxiety, going to an out of the way bathroom at work to dry heave until only spittle comes out. All at 27. Its going to be hard to go straight, i have a lot of succesful friends my age who drink. But Ive been living in an alcohol induced haZe for so long... 7 days for me is monumental. I havent done it in 9 years. Will one drink really set me back? Probably at this early stage in sobriety.

bigsombrero

Great question - and that is something that went through my head as well. Thing was, I was 37 when I got sober.

See where I'm going? Trust me, I totally get where you're coming from, and it's frustrating and maddening and it tears you apart.

But let's say you wait 10 years? Then what? Go to treatment again?

I think alcoholics have a lot of regrets. The most common regret is that they did not get sober earlier in life. Good luck in wrestling with your issues - but please know that things do not get easier if you "wait" to quit. They get worse.

Amajorityofone

Amen.

Two months into my sobriety I felt strong enough to go back in my local "watering hole" to have lunch. The thing that slapped me hard in the face was that all of my drinking buddies were not only still there, but still sitting in the same seats!

No stimulating conversation. Just a bunch of middle aged men watching television and nursing beers. Felt like a zombie convention.

Anna

Congratulations on getting your first week sober.

But, it sounds like you aren't sure that you've made the right decision and I can tell you that it takes a lot of motivation to stay sober and recover. I hope that you join us for the long term.

DarkDays

My biggest regret, one that plays over and over in my mind is the amount of my life I have wasted with alcohell , tragic really 30 years of incidents/hangover and running on 25% capacity if you know what I mean. Yes I now feel the best I have ever done and age is just a number ,cliched I agree lol

Good luck, sober is cool.

ersatzmatriarch

one drink? have you ever had just one drink?

the thing is, yes it will set you back... early in sobriety or not. that 'one drink' (if there even is such a thing) will not only open the door to many more drinks and the behaviors and physical ailments that go along with them, but your brain and body will pick up right where it left off or worse.

you must have quit drinking for a reason... remind yourself of what that was, an know that the reason is still valid, even if a few days sober is making you forget. there are plently of people here who went back out and had the courage to come share their experience here... find those threads and read them if your reasons for getting sober aren't strong for you anymore.

i hope you stick with sobriety... there is a rich, fun-filled life available here for you to grab.

SLB1968

When I am sober, I cannot stand being around drunk people. It pisses me off. I can't stand listening to them, looking at them, smelling them etc. and it hurts to know that what I'm seeing is a reflection of myself.

I'm not sure what to tell you man. We've all been there. Seems like when you de-friend alcohol, so to do you de-friend all your buddies and even some family.

My goal is to get in shape and try out some snow boarding again with my kids this winter; and, by next summer, have me and my daughter do some surfing lessons down the Cape. That is what is keeping me focused right now.

I gues my point is to try to dial in on something other than hanging out with buds knocking back drinks.

Alphabet

A fellow 27 year old!

Let me tell you, there are a bunch of people our age and even younger on the forum; some still struggling, some with years, years, of sobriety under their belts. I can totally relate to the feeling of being afraid to get and stay sober at this age - we have so much more life to live, right?

Unfortunately, this is a progressive illness. Some people here didn't hit rock bottom until later in life, while some of us hit it far earlier. Heck, some of us have hit rock bottom and are still digging with a pick axe to get further down! I'm almost glad I've gotten there (pick axe and all) at 27 so that I don't have to suffer like this for years and years down the road. Hopefully you come to see that too, because really, is years of waking up miserable really worth the bit of fun you have in the nights before?

Congrats on Day 6! My advice would be to keep going

jazzfish

I recognized my drinking problem in the early 20s, but didn't want to miss out on the fun. And truth be told, I had a lot of fun drinking back then. I kept drinking into my mid 40s.

What you don't realize so clearly, though, is that drinking is a choice that involves ENORMOUS tradeoffs. Tradeoffs in mental and physical health, tradeoffs in career development, tradeoffs in finances, tradeoffs in love and family, tradeoffs in self respect and integrity, tradeoffs with developing healthy habits for living, and tradeoffs with how long you will live a healthy life.

The sad thing is that eventually you will willingly tradeoff the things you really want to continue drinking; things like family, job, health, respect. You will go through life knowing nothing but the dull, drunken life; waking each morning to a hangover watching your dreams die and not caring because you are numb.

I choose to continue drinking in my 20s so I wouldn't miss out, but eventually I found I had to pay the piper and now I am really missing out on what my life could have been. I am now busy building it back, one slow day at a time.

Mountainmanbob

DarkDays

So true Bob ^^