New here- Feeling confused and a little lost
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 1
New here- Feeling confused and a little lost
Hi I am brand new here-
My relationship with alcohol has been up and down over the last few years- lately mostly down. I find I drink too much when I begin drinking- Socially
I become someone I don't like in retrospect and sometimes make poor decisions about driving/etc. I find myself full of anxiety and guilt the next day and the depression sometimes last for days. I know some of this is physiological, but either way...
I don't know that I'd call myself and alcoholic- I don't drink everyday. It's just that I enjoy it often too much when I drink and the problem is it is always around me.
I am a musician and own an art gallery. Most of my social life exists around musicians and in bars where live music is played and there is a constant flow of alcohol. I often cant control my intake once I get going. I would like to cut back but have not always been successful ( I find I can control myself if I am drinking at home, say wine or beer) But that is not always the case and I think I might need to stop completely, at least for a time.
I am incredibly anxious about slipping up and resisting the urge to drink when I'm around it. Do I need to become completely sober? How do I do this?
I am not in a position to turn my life upside down and change my setting- I just need to deal with it. How do I do this?
I am feeling kind of alone and unsure of how to handle all of this.
Thanks so much.
My relationship with alcohol has been up and down over the last few years- lately mostly down. I find I drink too much when I begin drinking- Socially
I become someone I don't like in retrospect and sometimes make poor decisions about driving/etc. I find myself full of anxiety and guilt the next day and the depression sometimes last for days. I know some of this is physiological, but either way...
I don't know that I'd call myself and alcoholic- I don't drink everyday. It's just that I enjoy it often too much when I drink and the problem is it is always around me.
I am a musician and own an art gallery. Most of my social life exists around musicians and in bars where live music is played and there is a constant flow of alcohol. I often cant control my intake once I get going. I would like to cut back but have not always been successful ( I find I can control myself if I am drinking at home, say wine or beer) But that is not always the case and I think I might need to stop completely, at least for a time.
I am incredibly anxious about slipping up and resisting the urge to drink when I'm around it. Do I need to become completely sober? How do I do this?
I am not in a position to turn my life upside down and change my setting- I just need to deal with it. How do I do this?
I am feeling kind of alone and unsure of how to handle all of this.
Thanks so much.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 807
Altea, welcome. Take some time reading these forums, many people did not drink everyday. It is more about what happens when you take that first drink. If you are an alcoholic, and only you can decide that, moderation will not work. As for how to do it the simple answer is don't drink. Again, look at the forums there is lots of information on the various programs available. Many people also see an addiction counselor. Good luck and keep posting.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Welcome to SR.
You seem to be at a point of confliction. You recognize you have a problem with alcohol that is exacerbated by the fact that you are surrounded by drinking and drinkers.
You want to get sober, but you don't want to change your settings.
I can only give you my experience. I couldn't get better until I distanced myself completely from a lifestyle that obited around alcohol and drugs and partying.
I am not saying you can't do it. But I expect you'll find it difficult. Should you struggle, I hope you are willing to change your stance about your lifestyle rather than change your goal of sobriety.
Good luck.
You seem to be at a point of confliction. You recognize you have a problem with alcohol that is exacerbated by the fact that you are surrounded by drinking and drinkers.
You want to get sober, but you don't want to change your settings.
I can only give you my experience. I couldn't get better until I distanced myself completely from a lifestyle that obited around alcohol and drugs and partying.
I am not saying you can't do it. But I expect you'll find it difficult. Should you struggle, I hope you are willing to change your stance about your lifestyle rather than change your goal of sobriety.
Good luck.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 9
Hi AlTea
I think only you can make the decision about whether to give it up completely or go down the moderation route. I suppose it depends on how bad 'bad' is (if you see what I mean)
Personally I became so BAD physically and mentally that I had to make the decision to go completely sober - no cutting down etc. I'm the sort of person who's 'everything or nothing' with no middle ground.
As for changing your setting it will take guts to keep it the same but change your own behaviour. The easy option is to avoid it but we can't avoid every trigger in life. One of mine is Friday nights but I can't stop Friday happening!
Good luck with your decision. X
I think only you can make the decision about whether to give it up completely or go down the moderation route. I suppose it depends on how bad 'bad' is (if you see what I mean)
Personally I became so BAD physically and mentally that I had to make the decision to go completely sober - no cutting down etc. I'm the sort of person who's 'everything or nothing' with no middle ground.
As for changing your setting it will take guts to keep it the same but change your own behaviour. The easy option is to avoid it but we can't avoid every trigger in life. One of mine is Friday nights but I can't stop Friday happening!
Good luck with your decision. X
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
