OneNightAWeek

Ive posted and asked questions and told about whats going on with my husband, but today I wanted to share that I am actively taking the steps I need to ensure my future. I have been sitting and finalizing my class schedule for Grad School. I have two semesters left and I had planned to do this before I was even aware of my husbands drug use, but then it was something I wanted to do for me, and now it still is, but it is also something I need to do for myself to help lay out my future alone if need be. I was planning to finish school while working part time, but with the situation as it is I have decided to go back to full time starting the beginning of September, same company and all that, but I no longer feel safe relying on my husbands for insurance and benefits because of the baby on the way. I feel overwhelmed sometimes, dont know if I can juggle all these balls, but Im pressing forward.

jerect

It always helped me to have goals when I was married to my addict.. It still helps me.. Good for you for focusing on you and your future

wicked

I was amazed at what I could accomplish once I started concentrating on myself
and the future for my children.
You can do it.

Beth

OneNightAWeek

Thanks for your encouragement. What has me the most scared is not knowing how I will feel through my pregnancy, but just like with my husband I dont have a crystal ball, and Im going to have to take it as it comes. This could be bad for my posting here, be prepared for future overly hormonal, overworked, emotionally stressed, feeling sorry for myself threads.

bluebelle

Good for you! Make sure that you schedule enough time for sleeping, eating well and exercise. When you get busy, it can be easy to neglect yourself, but that is when self-care is most important. While finishing my degree, I used all kinds of stress busting remedies, including guided meditation, prayer, stretching, breathing techniques, guided imagery, long baths--it all seemed to help! I ate a lot of sandwiches and slow-cooker meals.

OneNightAWeek

Thanks for all the great suggestions BlueBelle. I am very interested in doing meditation because I think that will be very calming for me and baby. I have a booklet that I picked up at the Dr office about it. I also have started doing a gentle form of yoga that I should be able to continue all the way through. It seems to have the same meditative process. I have not even thought about cooking. My husband despite his issues has been good helping with this especially since we found out about the baby. I kept getting dizzy and he got really worried, and since then he has been bringing healthy food into the house himself because he says I eat too much junk food. Isnt that wild? He is using cocaine, but thinks I eat too many snacks and its unhealthy for me. That might be some denial on is part. It reminds me of I think it was a quote from Russell Brand where he said he is a vegetarian and wouldnt eat a hamburger but he would do heroin or whatever his drug was. I think crock pot cooking, is a good idea and will have to look up some recipes.

pravchaw

Funny, my son is the same way. He has no problem using huge amts of mj and alcohol but is paranoid of taking any pharmaceuticals, even otc drugs on account of "side effects". Net I think he is self medicating his anxiety and depression with mj and alcohol but is scared of anti-depressants and wont take them.

heatherp78

Well done you your doing great

DecBaby

My case worker reminded this week that the people he has seen become most successful are people who set goals for themselves. It keeps them motivated. Sounds like you're doing just that.

madisonblake

Good job for taking care of you and your baby.

OneNightAWeek

Thanks !! I am trying, and I think your right it helps to have goals because it makes us accountable for our own time and what we accomplish.

I think my husband started using coke to self medicate himself. I mean I dont know if what he is telling me is exactly true, but it seems like his use is tied to feeling better about himself, and more capable or something.

pravchaw

Self medication is prob right. Addiction according to one theory is caused by a profound sense of helplessness and the use of drugs is a learned coping mechanism.