"Working" the Al-Anon program.
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Join Date: Aug 2011
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"Working" the Al-Anon program.
In Al-Anon a relapse is not as clear cut as in AA. Do I have to go back to step one every time I enable a qualifier, try to control their drinking, fail to set a boundary...?
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
No, although it doesn't hurt to kind of run the situation through the lens of the Steps when you're figuring out what went wrong. The kind of stuff you're talking about doesn't strike me as a "relapse" but rather just a failure to be perfect. Nobody expects perfection.
I think of a "relapse" in Al-Anon as more of a complete abandonment of the principles to the point where your life is again unmanageable. Failure to be perfect is just being human.
I think of a "relapse" in Al-Anon as more of a complete abandonment of the principles to the point where your life is again unmanageable. Failure to be perfect is just being human.
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Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 3,707
You were joking?
Or maybe not?
We joke about having relapses in Alanon.
Usually just means an On The Beam / Off The Beam thing, or going Codie.
I call my year and half out of Alanon a "relapse." Sort of was. Everyone tends to laugh about it.
Not like we have chips (or even pride, or barely even self-esteem) to take away.
But you were asking about steps? Like this is going around the Monopoly Game board?
No, just past back over them, and on you go.
1. I can't,
2. God can,
3. I might as well let God . . .
Or maybe not?
We joke about having relapses in Alanon.
Usually just means an On The Beam / Off The Beam thing, or going Codie.
I call my year and half out of Alanon a "relapse." Sort of was. Everyone tends to laugh about it.
Not like we have chips (or even pride, or barely even self-esteem) to take away.
But you were asking about steps? Like this is going around the Monopoly Game board?
No, just past back over them, and on you go.
1. I can't,
2. God can,
3. I might as well let God . . .
Bunnies!
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Florida
Posts: 1,905
Originally Posted by LexieCat 
No, although it doesn't hurt to kind of run the situation through the lens of the Steps when you're figuring out what went wrong. The kind of stuff you're talking about doesn't strike me as a "relapse" but rather just a failure to be perfect. Nobody expects perfection.
I think of a "relapse" in Al-Anon as more of a complete abandonment of the principles to the point where your life is again unmanageable. Failure to be perfect is just being human.
I think of a "relapse" in Al-Anon as more of a complete abandonment of the principles to the point where your life is again unmanageable. Failure to be perfect is just being human.
Gosh, if I had to start over every time I slipped, I'd never get anywhere with these steps. I examine where I screwed up and move on. Nothing earth shattering has happened in the last year, so I think I'm still on track. I even got through having a baby without AM around, and I didn't cave!
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