Gingerman08

Hi , I am a 30 year old Married mother of a five year old boy. An adorable five year old boy. I am currently in bed once again terribly hungover wasting my life away. Things have got to change, I have never been a member of this forum and actually never wrote about my drinking before. Well, here goes... I am an alcoholic who cannot get past 3 days without alcohol. Really could do with some advice, I am going to lose everything if I carry on.

Lightning Bug

Welcome Ginger, I am so glad you found us. I am a mom to a 5 year old boy too (and a 4 year old girl). Think about him as you start to come off the alcohol and get it out of your system. Imagine him seeing you happy and carefree, without an ounce of alcohol making you pretend to be.

You can do this. Start today by getting out of bed, taking care of your personal needs, and then read read and read. This messageboard is full of amazing people.

Welcome to SR.

mecanix

Hi Gingerman ,

Welcome to SR . You need never feel hungover again if you don't want to

For me i had to firstly not pick up the next drink and then secondly find ways to deal with the up's and down's of life without drinking to "cope" .

Nice to have you along on the journey ,

Bestwishes, m

forabetterlife

Gingerman, I am a mom too and I have had way too many mornings like that. All I can tell you just need to get through those rough days (sounds like your first one may be day 3) and slowly but surely, you get stronger, you get more used to life without alcohol, and you feel like a better person and mother. I am still finding my own way but I can tell you that I have learned that I never knew life could be so good since I stopped drinking. Everything, believe it or not, seems easier and simpler.

I am glad you found us, we are here for you and we all can relate.

Anna

Ginger, I know the feeling of being afraid of losing everything.

Know for sure that you can do this.

Make a plan for today and try to do something, anything that will take your mind off drinking for a little while.

Ghostlight1

I can relate. I spent so much time in bed hungover it's scary. I agree, what a waste.
Like others have said, just don't have that first drink. Sounds simple, I know, but it's been working for me for two and a half years.
It must be tough having a child you love very much. I just have myself to answer to. But, we're in the same boat. I'm not sure about you, but I'm an alcoholic. When I take that first drink, there's no telling how much I'll imbibe or how long it will last.

I gave my drinking problem over to my higher power. God in my case. And it's worked. I haven't had a drink in over two and half years.
There is are ways out . Many find AA helpful. There are other methods, but in my opinion, it takes willigness. And a desire to stay sober more than the desire to drink.
If you put as much energy into not drinking as you do to drinking, and those miserable days in bed, you almost can't go wrong.

I hope you do get sober, I know you can. I am on a daily repreive from alcohol and I am vigilant of the temptations.

Best to you.

Gingerman08

Thank you all for your kind words I feel a bit more confident now and have actually poured the remaining wine down the sink. Going to get dressed and get organised. Day 3 will be a tough one for me but I will read, read and read some more. I am serious this time. This addiction will not beat me!!

Becky

GracieLou

They say "nothing changes, if nothing changes"

It sounds like you have already made a change. Pouring out the booze is a big first step.

Congrats on moving on to day three. You will finds lots of stuff to read here and lots of support.

hayley86

Welcome Gingerman. You will find lots of great advice and support here. SR has been so important in my recovery. I have learned so much from reading and posting here. Do you have a plan for your recovery?. Wishing you well.

soberclover

I found that ridding my house of ALL the alcohol was ESSENTIAL to my early sobriety. I also read a TON of books about sobriety. I also found going to an AA meeting made me feel like I'm not on this journey alone in my own area. You can do this!!

Gingerman08

Hi Hayley, I don't have a plan as such. I have found a local AA meeting that I might go to but the thought does scare me. I am a shy person and the thought of public speaking does make me quite nervous. What kind of plan should I have? Any thoughts would be much appreciated.

Becky

jazzfish

There is also a chat room on this site that can be very helpful. It can be very informal, but they will turn on the "help" in a second if you ask.

Also, look around this site to find some actions you can towards your sobriety. Quitting drinking can feel very awkward and leave a big hole in your life. I find it useful to put together a plan in preparation for this. I also like to write in a journal about what I am going through, trying and feeling.

You could attend an AA meeting (you don't have to speak) and they have a plan. SMART recovery also has many tools that you can work on at their site. I always find it helpful to write out a cost-benefit analysis of drinking versus not-drinking. Writing it down really helps to clarify the price I am paying with my drinking.

hayley86

Hi Becky
Nice to meet you . When i was first getting sober i just focused on getting through those first few days. The way i did that was by keeping myself busy and distracting myself through any means so that i wasnt always thinking about drinking . The more free time i had the more i would think about drinking so keeping busy by walking, reading, and having a good routine really helped me. The most important thing that helped me get sober in those first weeks and then stay sober was by avoiding any places and people that might trigger thoughts about drinking. I found a good routine and a plan of action was really important for me.

Attending AA might be a good option if thats something you would like to do. Dont worry about being shy everyone there is very welcoming and you do not have to speak. You can go and listen to people share their stories which i did when i wanted to stop drinking and i found it very comforting to know there were so many other people with a similar story to mine. I do not attend AA now though.


If you want to chat to people in real time there is a chat room on this site. Everyone is very welcoming and friendly and you will find lots of support and advice in there if thats something you interested in. I use it alot. Wishing you well.

DorianLastname

Hi Gingerman,

I'm on day 7 and day 3 proved to be the most difficult for me. So if you say you can't go more than 3 days without drinking, force yourself past day 3 just once. After day 3 it got easier already.

Just really force yourself past day 3 and see what happens.

neferkamichael

Gingerman, I not even embarrassed or ashaed to call myself an alcoholic anymore, probably easy to say now that I am 3 years 2 months sober today. Please give yourself an applause for every minute you stay sober, because it truly is a victory. Rootin for ya.

Mountainmanbob

Eleni58

Welcome aboard and best wishes on your road to recovery! I wish I would have quit when my kids were little but unfortunately, did not quit until they were all adults and out of the house. I SOOO regret this! By quitting when your child is young enough will give him a lifetime, priceless gift!

When you get a craving, I recommend eating foods that take away the cravings: peanuts, cucumbers, chocolate, to name a few. Drink lots of water and V8 or fruit juices. Worked for me!

beamer13

Agree! It has saved my life.

Gingerman08

Hi again, more great suggestions. Going to order the AA book off Amazon. Thanks MountainManBob!
Well almost a full day under my belt. I felt very light headed and anxious but managed to eat my dinner with family. In bed now, on here to take my mind off things. Don't expect much sleep tonight but at least I will wake up sober. Going to go food shopping so will also stock up on fruit juice too etc. Speak to you all soon.
Becky

wakko

For me I had to go to AA meetings. No amount of education could substitute talking to other alcoholics