Acheleus

No love. I hate my self.

Taking5

Are you OK? We are here for you.

LuLu13

What's going on?

trikyriky

Hi friend

If you are stuggling please post it

Better to get it out there

Natom

You struggle more when you bottle it all in. They say that a problem shared is a problem halved. It may not always be as easy as that but sharing does help to alleviate some of the pain you're feeling.

Kayla50

What is going on? It helps to talk about it here.

UnixBer

Strangely tired here as well for two days now. My bet is it is PAWS and recovery that temporarily causes jamming around the whole body (or maybe it is AV experimenting with disruptive signals). I speak for myself obviously.

Some keen memories from the past, especially childhood have come to my mind as if needing urgent attention. They are coupled with a sense of either guilt, disrespect for self or disliking self and depressed feeling. But they also go, they don't really linger that long I believe. Hmm... I hope you get your perspective in order.

Acheleus

Just day 1 again. Trying to get a plan together. Lots of love here. I was just upset with my poor decisions. Going walking tonight instead of to the bars.

Acheleus

Starting to feel better but still angry at myself for drinking and bothering people. This has to stop so I am going to get dinner and clean my place then get laundry ready for tomorrow.

soberclover

I like your plan...it's simple and it's in the moment. I find that is important for me when I'm struggling. It's good for me to keep things real simple and basic. Getting back to the basics such as eating, sleeping, taking care of the home, and not drinking no matter what is sometimes all that I can do.

Anna

That sounds like a good plan.

Olive1

One day at a time, Acheleus.
Don't forget to breathe.
You can do it.

Mizzuno

Acheleus. You may need more support. Face to face support. Are you still with a doctor and talking with a therapist?

wiscsober

Pulling for you One Day At A Time

Acheleus

Yes starting new medicine for anxiety tomorrow. Having dinner.

Mizzuno

Hi Acheleus. I know that you will make it through this struggle. It is one day at a time. Maybe the new meds will help you with your anxiety. I am sorry to see that this has been a hard road. You are going to be well A. Keep working through the hard stuff and you will come out on the other side of this much stronger. We are here for you.

Acheleus

I'm just so tired of tricking myself into believing I can drink. I cannot. Now I feel so scared and alone but I know tomorrow I will feel a little bit better and I have to focus on being devoted to my recovery. AA meeting tomorrow at 5, might go walking tonight if I don't feel better soon. Thank you Mizz. I'm so sick of being sick. It's time for me to wake up and grow up.

Mizzuno

Health on all levels does not happen over night. I think that you are processing a lot of things Acheleus. This takes time, and it takes a lot of sorting through the crap. I know that you are sick of being sick. I do not think you are sick though Acheleus. I think you have some stuff to wade through. I am not sure of your age, but I am reminded of myself in some of your posts. Around 25 to 30, I had many issues to sort out. I marched my ### down to a therapist and did not leave until I felt like I was going to be alright. Even now at 33, I have things that come up. These issues are manageable. I talk about them. I guess what i am trying to say is that you are going to be alright. Hold on, and put one foot in front of the other. This will not be the rest of your life. Get all the help that you can, all the resources you can, keep moving forward. You are doing wonderful things, so acknowledge these wonderful things.

Silvy69

I felt hopeless last night but it was a short moment.. I started cleaning, posted here and feedback was what kept me going... I stayed busy fr a couple of hrs and that need to go out went away. Stay strong, find what works for you... Sometimes you just have to be in the moment and say that having a drink is not an option at this moment... It helps me..
I also found out that I can't do this alone without a support system in person, AA is helping so much... Just keep posting..

mecanix

I hope the new meds help Acheleus ,

I duuno how strong i'd be if i slipped again , you got back up and you got back on , that is so great

Bestwishes, m