New, and a bit confused.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2
New, and a bit confused.
Hello,
I'm not really sure why I am here, I suppose it's because I feel that my drinking is getting out of control at the moment. I am a 24 year old female. I do not drink every day I am what you would call a binge drinker. I cannot stop at just having a few drinks usually. For some reason sometimes I can do this if I stop before 4, but if I have any more than that the rest of my whole day will be spent drunk. I'm not really sure if I want to quit drinking completely for ever, but I do think a break is necessary to gain back control of my drinking. Does anyone on here know if this is a skill that you can acquire? I have had this issue before and stopped cold turkey no problem but I just feel like everyone always wants to go for drinks. I feel like a lot of my friends are having these issues too but for some reason it doesn't bother them. I've started to go to the bar by myself because I get really antisocial when I drink and I just want to be alone. Going for drinks by yourself, I'm talking usually 5 over the course of 3-4 hours is probably turning into a bit of an issue. I don't actually know what to say I just wanted some feedback from someone, and I am not ready to talk to my boyfriend and family about it yet. Thank you for reading.
I'm not really sure why I am here, I suppose it's because I feel that my drinking is getting out of control at the moment. I am a 24 year old female. I do not drink every day I am what you would call a binge drinker. I cannot stop at just having a few drinks usually. For some reason sometimes I can do this if I stop before 4, but if I have any more than that the rest of my whole day will be spent drunk. I'm not really sure if I want to quit drinking completely for ever, but I do think a break is necessary to gain back control of my drinking. Does anyone on here know if this is a skill that you can acquire? I have had this issue before and stopped cold turkey no problem but I just feel like everyone always wants to go for drinks. I feel like a lot of my friends are having these issues too but for some reason it doesn't bother them. I've started to go to the bar by myself because I get really antisocial when I drink and I just want to be alone. Going for drinks by yourself, I'm talking usually 5 over the course of 3-4 hours is probably turning into a bit of an issue. I don't actually know what to say I just wanted some feedback from someone, and I am not ready to talk to my boyfriend and family about it yet. Thank you for reading.
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
Welcome!
I don't know if it's a skill you can learn. I know it's a skill I can't learn.
I drank like you when I was 24. I continued to drink, and things got worse. That old adage, "If you think you might have a problem with alcohol, then you have a problem with alcohol" is usually true.
Read around here for a while. Lots of good information. I hope you find the answers you're looking for.
I don't know if it's a skill you can learn. I know it's a skill I can't learn.
I drank like you when I was 24. I continued to drink, and things got worse. That old adage, "If you think you might have a problem with alcohol, then you have a problem with alcohol" is usually true.
Read around here for a while. Lots of good information. I hope you find the answers you're looking for.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Welcome.
Looking back on my twenties (I'm 57 now) all the evidence that I had a problem with alcohol was apparent. But I failed to do anything about it until I was 54.
Don't wait 30 more years to convince yourself that you'd have been better off sober than try to control your drinking.
Looking back on my twenties (I'm 57 now) all the evidence that I had a problem with alcohol was apparent. But I failed to do anything about it until I was 54.
Don't wait 30 more years to convince yourself that you'd have been better off sober than try to control your drinking.
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
Pretty sure many of us will wince a little when we read your post....seeing ourselves in it. No "off" button seems common to us all. In your early 20's, social "alcoholizing" is pretty big. If I had to define my drinking, I suppose I would lean to more of a binger myself..although in my 30's, with more cash at my disposal, nightly wine became a part of it. Sometimes I would only have a couple glasses...often the whole bottle or more...and sometimes complete blackout. I've been blacking out for most of 3 decades. I cannot moderate because I NEVER have any certainty where one drink will lead me. Took a long time to figure that out. I wasted years trying to figure it....
Abstinence is my only certainty. I can't grow an "off" button.
Abstinence is my only certainty. I can't grow an "off" button.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2
I just wanted to mention this website is extremely helpful. What leads me to believe that it is possible is my boyfriend used to be a heavy drinker and one day he just snapped out of it when he turned about 26. However, he never went to the bar alone.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 19
Jay, I know it's hard being as young as you are, since drinking is the "normal" way to socialize in your early twenties. I did the same thing. But as drinking became the "normal" way to socialize in my early thirties as well, it became apparent that *how* I was drinking was not normal. I could go out to the bar with friends and have one or two, (or three or four), knowing that I would go home, by myself, and drink a whole bottle of wine or 10 beers, or whatever.
It doesn't sound like drinking is social or fun for you anymore. Keep reading on here and posting for support. I'm not sure if anyone can successfully just flip a switch and "turn off" a drinking problem. I know I can't. Good luck and welcome.
It doesn't sound like drinking is social or fun for you anymore. Keep reading on here and posting for support. I'm not sure if anyone can successfully just flip a switch and "turn off" a drinking problem. I know I can't. Good luck and welcome.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,560
Welcome Jay. I hope you find the help you're looking for - you have some good responses already.
We'd do anything to prevent you from going down the path we've walked. I was in my 50's when I finally figured out that I had no control once that first drink got in my system. No one wants to believe they can't manage it, so I struggled for decades trying to do the impossible. I once drank like you are now - and it resulted in complete dependence later in life. It was hell to get off it by then. Please be careful. I'm glad you've come here for advice and suggestions - most never realize what danger they are in.
We'd do anything to prevent you from going down the path we've walked. I was in my 50's when I finally figured out that I had no control once that first drink got in my system. No one wants to believe they can't manage it, so I struggled for decades trying to do the impossible. I once drank like you are now - and it resulted in complete dependence later in life. It was hell to get off it by then. Please be careful. I'm glad you've come here for advice and suggestions - most never realize what danger they are in.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: South west uk
Posts: 960
Welcome. 2 years ago I was your age and doing the same. 2 years on and I've had to seek help to stop and currently on day 16. Best thing I've ever done. Doesn't matter what age you re, the earlier you do something about it the better. Not drinking hasn't stopped my socialising at all, certainlyma different experience, and a much healthier/cheaper option.
If your bf has stopped then he will support you and help you if you decide to stop
Good luck and keep us updated
Help is always here!
If your bf has stopped then he will support you and help you if you decide to stop
Good luck and keep us updated
Help is always here!
A Day at a Time
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Grand Rapids MI
Posts: 6,435
The problem with alcoholism is that it is progressive which means it only gets worse. The sooner you get off the alcoholic elevator the easier it is and the better it is for you. If you were honest with yourself you know you have a problem the question is what are you going to do about it.
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 14,921
Welcome.
Looking back on my twenties (I'm 57 now) all the evidence that I had a problem with alcohol was apparent. But I failed to do anything about it until I was 54.
Don't wait 30 more years to convince yourself that you'd have been better off sober than try to control your drinking.
What doggonecarl said applies to me as well. The numbers are a little different (I'm a bit younger) but the concepts the same.
Welcome to SR, stick around, you will learn a lot.
Looking back on my twenties (I'm 57 now) all the evidence that I had a problem with alcohol was apparent. But I failed to do anything about it until I was 54.
Don't wait 30 more years to convince yourself that you'd have been better off sober than try to control your drinking.
What doggonecarl said applies to me as well. The numbers are a little different (I'm a bit younger) but the concepts the same.
Welcome to SR, stick around, you will learn a lot.
Recovering ostrich
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Tampa Bay, Florida
Posts: 2,551
Welcome! I've been waiting to snap out if it... I'm 37 now. I decided not to wait for that moment and I don't think it was coming. I was also a binge drinker. But the binges got worse and worse and the weekends were getting longer (I know it is only Thursday but Friday is a weekend day....)
Good luck, glad you found us!
Good luck, glad you found us!
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