A Miracle
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Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: M.D.R. Ca.
Posts: 29
A Miracle
Haven't kept up much with you guys but I intended to. Much has happened. My husband wasted his car; got the crap beat out of him in a bar (not his fault of course) and admitted he was smoking crack. I was sick and tired of having nothing; doing nothing (except paying his bar bills each month) and done with the lies and secrecy and manipulation. I outed him to his mom and sister and all his friends. His mom called and made him a new *******. He agreed to go to AA but I was skeptical. He started going last week and loves it! He played softball for hours this morning with his AA group and then had a barbecue. He is going away on retreat with them next weekend. He says he has never met such a caring, fun, supportive group of people and he is jazzed to be a part of it. He is hopeful and sees new possibilities around every corner. He is 8 days sober and sorry he didn't start sooner. Already has a sponsor and does everything he is told. No attitude - no anger. I know these things don't always work out and he has a long hard road ahead of him but he wants it so badly and is so energized and grateful for the companionship and love in his group that I think he has a really really good chance of making it stick. I don't know who this man is anymore. Certainly not the person who put me through such hell for years. I wanted to share with you that miracles can happen - when you least expect them. I never expected this. I had one foot out the door and was convinced I could never feel anything but rage and disgust for him anymore. Apparently there was some love left for him deep in my heart and I was able to connect with it. I feel such profound gratitude I could have wept when he told me how great his first meeting was. He has cancelled dinner plans; weekend plans and pretty much everything to meet his commitment of daily meetings. This is the most important thing in his life right now. I still need Al-Anon but now I need it to try to re-build a relationship with him when I used to need it to set myself free from him without guilt. God bless you all and I hope you experience a little of what I have had the good fortune to experience this past week. Love, Chi
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