RTR

I've just joined and am the husband of a beautiful woman who has finally admitted she is an alcoholic. She has had so much pain and upset to deal with but has now found the courage to confront her demons. I'm not sure what I want to say or how this forum will help but I want to do all I can to try and understand the issue and support her as best I can.

I've browsed the forum and various topics, it looks as though there is a community of like-minded people affected by this disease in all manner of ways. I will contribute however I can in the hope my experiences can help while also learning more as I go.

GLitz22

Welcome. We will try to support you supporting her!

aw58

Hi Welcome to the forum. Its good you can talk to your wife regarding her drinking. My Hubby is very supportive in my goal to be alcohol free, he has never once given me a lecture or asked me to stop, it was my decision and Im doing it for me. I am now two weeks without a drink, this is my third attempt in two years I gave up for 8 months then 6 this is my last I say last because I will not fail this time. Your wife has to deal with it her way, if she is a very heavy drinker giving up immediately can cause serious side effects and even be fatal. A trip to the doctor might be required. Maybe your wife can join the forum its a great place and we understand from all points of view . I lived with an alcoholic so I also know that side and unfortunately for me after that destructive relation ended it left me addicted to the nasty stuff , but Im now going to be free and its feeling great ...

RTR

Thank you all for your replies and welcome. My wife is getting all the professional help and support available. Me joining here is more about what I can do to help her but also help myself throughout this process so that we survive as a couple to have the long, happy life we want.

LexieCat

Hi, and welcome from me, too! I've been in two alcoholic marriages and am now five years sober, myself, and the best thing to do to help your wife is to let her handle her own recovery. If you stay focused on you, and what YOU need for yourself, and let her deal with her alcoholism, you stand a fighting chance. No guarantees, of course, and some marriages fail even when both parties completely recover.

But my main point is that too much "helping" is going to be bad for both of you.

Glad you're here. Have you checked out Al-Anon?

honeypig

Welcome, RTR, and seconding the recommendation to check into Alanon. Even if you have some reservations, do like they say and "take what you like and leave the rest." You're almost certain to find a lot of support there.

Good for you for educating yourself regarding the situation. Don't miss the stickies at the top of this page for a TON of good info, including this http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...l-problem.html

Wishing you strength and clarity as you go thru the day.

RTR

A few responses have recommended Al-Anon and looking at their site it offers a lot of information as well as the opportunity to attend meetings with like-minded people affected by this disease.

unsureoffuture

Welcome, you will find alot of knowledge, experience and information about the disease and how it affects everyone involved on this forum. You may also want to look into a local Al-Anon chapter. It is for people who are affected by alcoholics in their lives. This would be very beneficial for you as it gives you tools to help yourselfwhile at the same time helping her.