butterfly33

I came here on June 21st and declared my 1st day of sobriety. I made it to 8 days then ****ed up. Those 8 days were mostly wonderful, hardly any cravings, no hangovers, feelings of pride within myself, enhanced mental clarity, major improvements nutritionally, enthusiasm about my alcohol free future. In fact, things seemed to be going so well that I actually became concerned about how easy I was finding it! I posted here on SR expressing my concerns about my over-confidence - why was it feeling so easy?
I knew that I had an unavoidable social arrangement coming up (a family members birthday celebration in a local restaurant) I had convinced myself that I would be fine, I could say no to alcohol and just focus on eating some nice food. Then 2 days previous, feeling as fresh as a daisy, I started to feel that it would be ok to have 1 glass of wine with my meal. I was feeling very healthy, eating great, getting relatively good sleep, drinking lots of water, taking vitamins... 1 glass of wine would be ok. I was thinking about this glass of wine a lot of the time during those two days.
June 29th came, the birthday dinner. It was a stressful day, I had lots to do. I had to be at the restaurant for 7:30pm and by 6:45 I was still cooking dinner for the kids. To cut a long story short I ended up having a whiskey and coke with my companion before leaving the house - I was feeling stressed, rushed and pressured to be on time - this quick drink settled my nerves and what the hell, 2 drinks isn't going to undo all my good work I told myself.
At the restaurant we were greeted and offered a drink, I had planned to ask for water but found myself with a large glass of wine. We were seated and when the orders went round I gladly agreed to share a bottle of red with the host. All in all that night, I didn't drink to excess, I was home and in bed by 11pm... I felt a bit tipsy but mainly tired.
Next morning I felt physically ok. My plan for not drinking more than 1 drink hadn't materialized but hey, I hadn't gone crazy with it and I had drank moderately so I felt still somewhat in control.
Fast forward to the early evening... Hello alcohol cravings, anxiety, feelings of failure etc etc. I found myself back on the familiar journey to buy some wine to settle my feelings. From that night to this night I have pulled every excuse to drink almost every night and some days too... It's school holidays, the sun is shining, I can't do this, my friend came over with wine, I've had a bad day, i'll drink tonight and stop tomorrow........
Maybe tomorrow will be my day, I'm going to give it another try anyway. At least this time I don't think I'll have those feelings of over-confidence, after my last attempt I think I know a little more about the devil I'm dealing with.
Once again, please wish me luck X

Anna

Of course, I wish you luck and you can do this.

I tried one neighborhood party in week 3. Stupid idea. Oh sure, I actually stayed sober that night, but was ready to rip the walls off the house. The next morning I was out in the wine aisle of the supermarket. So...I decided I needed to use the 'No' word and I did. Things that I thought were essential, in fact were not. I needed to avoid alcohol for months and it really helped.

least

Glad you're giving it another go. You can do this!

mecanix

I avoided drink for the first few months , not even going down that aisle in the supermarket .

Bestwishes, m

Nuudawn

I'm sure you already know this...but that's where you lost the battle. But live and learn right? You saw where it took you. So saddle up and ride again. Welcome back.

Dee74

There's thousands of us here who 'made it' - you can too - honestly

I think the common elements to every successful recovery are support and a willingness to change our lives, especially where it can help us stay sober.

Find support - think about the ways your old life might be leading you back to alcohol - change stuff.

You can do this - 100%

D