Jr85

My name's J and I'm an Alcoholic.

Huxley

Hey J, my name's Huxley and I'm an alcoholic too.

How you doing today?

x

Jr85

Not so bad. Just trying my best to distract my brain which is running in 20 different directions at once.

I'm not long sobered up. But now the sickness has passed, which was the worst yet this time, I lost a stone in five days due to not eating. I'm struggling to find reasons to stay sober for good.

*Sorry for ranting, my heads a mess at the moment.

Huxley

Not ranting, chatting

There's lots of reasons to stay sober for good, but none of them seem that important while your head's in a toilet. I'd stick with just staying sober for tomorrow. Have you got any plans?

Sorry to hear you got so sick. x

Petecrab

Youve done so well so far, take everyday as it comes, feel proud!

Jr85

I've a few hours work on tomorrow but not much after that. Been spending most of my time online reading things I'm interested in. It's the only thing I've found that slows my brain down a little, but this gets quite boring after a while.

Going to have to eventually get myself up and start to face the world again.

Huxley

That's cool - like Petecrab said, take it as it comes. Getting bored is a good sign - drink some tea, take a walk.

And be proud as hell of 5 days. It took me about 10 years to get to 5 days

You said you got more sick this time - have you got clean before?

Jr85

Yea I'd binge drink. So there's always a few days sickness but this time I drank solid for a week or more and had five days of not being able to keep water down. So in a way I'm always getting clean.

I have swore off it numerous times, and prob even meant it at the time. This time is different tho. Everything that goes wrong in my life can be traced back to is directly due to me drinking. It simply has to stop.

I've pushed my pregnant fiancée so far, that's she's moved around 90 miles away, blocked all contact with me and swears I'll never see the child. I literally have no way of getting a msg to her even.

I know she has very little material possessions where she's went too, but having nothing is better then putting up with me. Says it all really.

I can't shake the feeling sorry for myself and the "why shouldn't I drink now" feeling tho.

*damn that was good to get off the chest!

Huxley

Good!

That's a tough story dude, and I feel for you, but you're doing the right thing being here. This place saved my soul, no exaggeration, and it's saving me again right now. We're a whole lot of crazies but you won't find anywhere else like it.

As for drinking now? You could. But you'd start this whole thing all over again. It's not going to go away - if you drink today you're just going to wake up wanting to drink tomorrow. But if you DON't drink today, you'll wake up tomorrow knowing you made it another 24hrs.

Do that for a while, and you've been sober a month. Practice makes perfect.

They're both options. I quit a year and a half ago, with one relapse. I can tell you for certain, sober is better.

xx

Anna

Welcome!

We understand how hard this is.

thuggybear

hi! welcome.

My name is thuggybear, and I am a bipolar alcoholic

Jr85

Thanks for all the replys and welcomes. My head has definitely settled down. I was even talking to myself before signing up! ha

I'm definitely going to stick about the forum. Must have a look around it now.

J.

Huxley

Go read

I'm off to bed. Hope your night is okay.

xx

hayley86

Hi J, welcome. This website has helped me alot in getting sober.

Hayley

Dee74

welcome to SR J

D

Hevyn

Pleased to meet you, J. Glad to have you part of the family.

Being here helped me so much - it felt so good to relieve some of my anxiety. We all understand how rough it is to begin living again in a new way. You can do it.