Spreading hope on July 4th!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: PA
Posts: 985
Spreading hope on July 4th!
Hi everyone! Hope your 4th is going well. I recall not so long ago my 4th's were turbulent, moody and off ended up alone for the night and then was told it was all my fault. No matter what I did or did not do - it was never "just right" for my exah.
The first year without him July 4th was spent in my back yard getting to know my neighbors for the first time. I discovered that they were quite chatty and friendly -inviting me to join each of their parties. I was shocked to say the least because I had always avoided my neighbors wondering what they thought of all the times the police showed up at my house - the antics and drama of my exah which I thought were loud and disruptive.
What I learned is that they too had their own problems and didn't seem to notice -wondering what we all thought about what was going in their homes. I was shocked to learn that others were also dealing with an A family member.
So we are all a great support to one another now years later which is something I always wanted. I also learned not to keep secrets because they only served to separate me from people who might want to be a friend. My shame was not mine to have but to let go of.
My kids always found a somewhere else to go and now they surround me with love and care.
For those who do not know me - I have been ill and in/out hospital a lot this year. I have a chronic illness that needs a lot of attention and care. It is uncurable - chronic but treatable. I lost half of my vision because of it and I have benign tumours throughout my body occassionally interferring with some organ function but it so far has not spread to them.
If possible, I have more gratitude since this happened as I discovered many medical professionals who can be very caring and will go the extra mile (or else I would be blind today and my illness untreated). I have people daily checking on me and sending prayers all the time. Mostly worse things could have happened - full blindness and/or wide spread cancer - neither turned out to be true so I am thankful for more years to enjoy my family and friends.
My freedom came when I saw the problem of A and understood I had choices. I was slow to understand but got there one day at a time. I send peace to those who are suffering today and hope that you too will find your own freedom soon.
Thanks for reading.
The first year without him July 4th was spent in my back yard getting to know my neighbors for the first time. I discovered that they were quite chatty and friendly -inviting me to join each of their parties. I was shocked to say the least because I had always avoided my neighbors wondering what they thought of all the times the police showed up at my house - the antics and drama of my exah which I thought were loud and disruptive.
What I learned is that they too had their own problems and didn't seem to notice -wondering what we all thought about what was going in their homes. I was shocked to learn that others were also dealing with an A family member.
So we are all a great support to one another now years later which is something I always wanted. I also learned not to keep secrets because they only served to separate me from people who might want to be a friend. My shame was not mine to have but to let go of.
My kids always found a somewhere else to go and now they surround me with love and care.
For those who do not know me - I have been ill and in/out hospital a lot this year. I have a chronic illness that needs a lot of attention and care. It is uncurable - chronic but treatable. I lost half of my vision because of it and I have benign tumours throughout my body occassionally interferring with some organ function but it so far has not spread to them.
If possible, I have more gratitude since this happened as I discovered many medical professionals who can be very caring and will go the extra mile (or else I would be blind today and my illness untreated). I have people daily checking on me and sending prayers all the time. Mostly worse things could have happened - full blindness and/or wide spread cancer - neither turned out to be true so I am thankful for more years to enjoy my family and friends.
My freedom came when I saw the problem of A and understood I had choices. I was slow to understand but got there one day at a time. I send peace to those who are suffering today and hope that you too will find your own freedom soon.
Thanks for reading.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Hey, Kassie! Glad you checked in, and so happy to hear things are going so well for you!
We ALL deserve to be free--it's something that is hard to appreciate sometimes until you've regained it. When you are free, there are ways of facing any problems that come your way. When you're not free, the smallest problems can become huge obstacles.
Happy 4th to you!
We ALL deserve to be free--it's something that is hard to appreciate sometimes until you've regained it. When you are free, there are ways of facing any problems that come your way. When you're not free, the smallest problems can become huge obstacles.
Happy 4th to you!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Waterford MI
Posts: 4,202
My freedom came when I saw the problem of A and understood I had choices. I was slow to understand but got there one day at a time. I send peace to those who are suffering today and hope that you too will find your own freedom soon.
So delighted to hear from you, and grateful to hear of your recovery, both physical and
spiritual.
I will gladly accept the peace you are sending out and send some serenity of my own
back to you.
Thank you so much for this Independence Day reminder to be joyous, happy and free.
And to share the message with all.
Beth
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