walkingwithgod

How did you come to terms with being an alcoholic, and move forward? I have 98 days today.

Crossfitdad

I haven't. I'm not sure I accept that I am an alcoholic. I have my own views of what constitutes an alcoholic and I don't fit that. I do however have a problem with alcohol and it was making me pretty downright miserable. I'm nine days in and am so happy with my decision to quit.

You are 98 days in...you aren't drinking...why do you have to come to terms? Best of luck and keep it up.

Soberpotamus

I was tired of spinning my wheels. I saw unmet goals, personal failures, relationship failures, and the beginnings of some loss of health. I had the great example of my alcoholic dead mother looming before me as well. That's a pretty good motivator... not wanting to end up dead, with unfulfilled dreams and goals.

The existential angst I'd felt since my late teens and early 20's had grown out of control, and I needed some peace finally. The substance I'd used to "control" things eventually was controlling me. That's not a happy realization.

ClearLight

I'm an alcoholic.

I'm also allergic to Penicillin, my hair is thinning and I'm right handed.
I'm not going to change any of those things but I can deal with them as long as I acknowledge them as being real.

That's how I look at it. You play the hand you're dealt. If you refuse to even recognize the cards in your hand then you're bound to lose.

Anna

Hmm, the facts were knocking me on the head. I was on the verge of losing everything I valued in my life. I had no choice but to accept that I was an alcoholic.

And, moving forward has been a process. I looked at what was left of me as I hit my bottom and accepted that I was not the person I had been pretending to be. I found that each small change I made in my life had a ripple effect.

Congratulations on 98 days sober!

AlexaDaly

My glass of wine after work became more and more of a habit. Pretty soon it was a whole bottle of wine every night, and drinking all weekend. I would plan my day around it, like if I had to drive somewhere in the evening, I would be planning how soon I would get home to start drinking. It was starting to control me. I could no longer remember a day of sobriety over 2 to 3 years. My 3 kids never saw me without a drink in my hand. I would wake up every day with a headache and go to work. I tried cutting down, like so many others, and it was impossible. I finally got fed up completely. I didn't want to go to meetings; I'm a big reader and self-help kind of person. So I started with Allen Carr's book "EasyWay to stop drinking". Then Craig Beck's "Alcohol lied to me" method plus the hypnotism tracks you can get on Audible and listen to before bed. I'm done with alcohol. Just done!

ScottFromWI

I finally just realized that i wanted to be sober more than being drunk all the time. For my own health and my family. I had thought about it for years, but a couple of health scares and lots of reading helped immensly. I quit nicotine several years ago the same way, i just decided enough was enough already.

hypochondriac

Are you struggling with accepting that WWG? To be honest it is something that plagued me for a bit, but I figured it was my AV. I decided to just not drink and see what happened and it turns out that was the right choice. I feel much better about it these days. Sure I still get the odd doubt but I get doubts about a lot of things. I just dismiss them and move on. I found in moments of doubt though that it was really useful to read over my old posts.

GracieLou

I dunno, for me I have lived with it so long it was not like it was a shock to me.

It is not like I woke up one day and said, "Dang, I am an alcoholic". I knew it for a long time but I was still fighting with it. I decided to stop fighting.

I simply do not want to drink anymore or get drunk and since one ALWAYS leads to the other the only choice I have is to not drink. That was the simple side of things.

The harder part is going from there. Turning my life around. Going to AA, having a sponsor and doing the steps. That is the part that I did not want to face all those years. I did not want to face my resentments much less give them up. They were a part of me and I thought they defined me but I am learning that is not the case. They stifled and smothered me.

I used alcohol to hide from them, to fuel them and to excuse them. That is the part I had to come to terms with, not being an alcoholic.

doggonecarl

I don't think coming to terms with being an alcoholic has anything to do with me staying sober. I did it by not drinking...for 1031 days.

Moving forward...

Isaiah

It helped me to move forward when I could start to separate the bad things I did while actively drinking with the potential I have to lead a basically normal, happy and ethical life by not using, and that I'm still as much an alcoholic one way or another.

Today I ran some errands, paid my rent, drank some coffee, mailed letters to friends, rode my bike and wrote some replies on these forums on this day off. And I did so being a complete and total alcoholic every second of it.

GreenEggsAndHam

I finally got sick of myself and sick of being controlled by alcohol.

I'm trying to move forward with help from this forum and AA.