TheNew

The sobriety count starts as of today. Today hasn't entirely started yet but I'm feeling confident about this time. The only problem I have is that I've told so many people so many times that I'm going to stay sober and then I fall back again. It has made me lose so many friends. I just need to show them that this time is different than all the other times which is going to take a while for them to understand since I haven't made it past 30 days in a long time.

Bubovski

Do you have a support group out there of some sort?
It can be hard willing yourself with no external help.

GracieLou

You don't need to show them anything right now. The only person you need concern yourself with is you. Amends for past mistakes and living amends takes time.

I wanted everything to be okay right now. Today. That is not going to happen. Recovery takes work and it takes time but you have to try not to look at tomorrow or the next day or next week. One day at a time. Look only at today, hour by hour if you have to.

Hang in there!

least

I'm glad you're getting back on the right track. You'll find a lot of support here.

visch1

Hi. I hate to remember how many times I was where you are. I needed AA to straighten my twisted alcoholic thinking. Unfortunately it took about 2 years to plug the jug because I was unique in my sick mind, they called it terminal uniqueness and I was on a very slippery slope. Finally after too much pain I got honest with MYSELF, realized I could NOT drink in safety and hey stupid it's the first drink that gets me drunk! Many meetings, getting very active, many meetings and WORKING the steps of recovery have worked for me for over 30 years. For me AA is the softest easy way. Many prefer other methods which might work also which I question the long term success rate, say over ten years. BE WELL

TheNew

I thought I had it under control but I didn't. I'm back at day Zero again. I wasn't trying hard enough. I should have tried harder. I'm still struggling but I have hope.

Dee74

I'm not sure what you're doing to stay sober but maybe you need a different approach?
what about trying something different?

D

TheNew

I think I do need a different approach because what I'm doing isn't working for me.

Notmyrealname

I will tell the normals that I quit when I hit my one year anniversary.

I am pretty sure they will all have figured it out by then, though.


Oh, on topic, good job on day one!

AlexaDaly

Don't worry about what people think. I know that's not easy. You can do it. Don't ever give up. It sounds like you're using the Willpower method, and that is not going to work for very long. The subconscious is too strong. Then you feel worse when you have a failure, and round and round and round. I recommend (to everyone) Alcohol Lied to Me by Craig Beck, and Allen Carr's book the EasyWay to Stop Drinking. Read and follow both like I've done. Both reiterate the same strategies in a slightly different way. It will all be so clear to you after reading them, you won't ever want to touch another drink. Literally changed my life. Best wishes!

Pamel

Thanks Alexa, for a great post. Most importantly the subconscious is too strong. It is so easy to promise again and again to not drink, but unless there is daily effort, it will happen, and I especially hate the "failure" that comes with it. We can just not drink again. Failure is a HUGE word to browbeat ourselves with.

Sonrisa12

I agree - you can't worry about anyone else except yourself. That is the most important part - and make a pact with yourself. You and you alone can stop drinking. Its not so much about announcing it to everyone - its about making a promise to yourself and sticking too it. Its about wanting to get better.

Congrats on Day 1 !!!!!

neferkamichael

TheNew, I'm back at day Zero again? You are FANTASTIC. Congratulations. Just never give up and keep gettin back on your horse if ya fall off again and you'll quit, sooner or later, and I hope it is sooner than later. Rootin for ya.

TheNew

Thanks everyone. I'm an addict though, not an alcoholic but I can apply everything you guys said to drugs.

Pamel

Well, I blathered on but I like to think of it as a new start, reflecting on experience (the best teacher).

Carry on, ALL of us....

joygirl

TheNew,
You are great!
I'm an addict too. I understand.
Do it for you now. You. Not for anyone else.
Make the announcement of quitting to yourself, make a plan for yourself.
Let everyone else just figure it out as they see you get clean. You can't do this to prove something to someone else.
You can do it, you are worth the work to stay clean!