Have not posted in a long time, need advice...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 189
Have not posted in a long time, need advice...
I am coming up on a year in July... (YAY!!)
But now need advice on another subject. My brother was in a motorcycle accident due to his drinking. He is being discharged today. The accident was severe, he is lucky to be alive and I have never seen a BAC as high as the report we just got.
I am terrified that he is going to convince an idiot friend to bring him alcohol. He says he is done, but keeps making "jokes" about wanting a miniture or whatever he thinks is funny at the moment.
I know I have no control over him or his choices (he is early 20's), he has ALOT of recovery time (for physical injuries) ahead of him and I want to help him as much as I can but do not know how.
I am afraid that this was his last chance and he may not make it if he doesn't stop.
Any advice at all?
But now need advice on another subject. My brother was in a motorcycle accident due to his drinking. He is being discharged today. The accident was severe, he is lucky to be alive and I have never seen a BAC as high as the report we just got.
I am terrified that he is going to convince an idiot friend to bring him alcohol. He says he is done, but keeps making "jokes" about wanting a miniture or whatever he thinks is funny at the moment.
I know I have no control over him or his choices (he is early 20's), he has ALOT of recovery time (for physical injuries) ahead of him and I want to help him as much as I can but do not know how.
I am afraid that this was his last chance and he may not make it if he doesn't stop.
Any advice at all?
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Sorry to hear that he's even still joking about drinking. But as you say, he's young and probably feels invincible. You could certainly talk to him but honestly if he's not interested in quitting he wont. He'll find a way to get alcohol no matter how hard you try to stop him.
Run to live... live to run
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Western Maryland
Posts: 1,091
hey there! Sadly, he isn't going to quit until he's ready to quit. You'd think that a horrible accident would wake him up, but it's clear it didn't. All you can do is have a heart to heart with him and tell him that you worry about him. Other than that, there probably isn't much you can do. *hugs*
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 11,481
Congrats on your upcoming year of sobriety, Sober!
I'd like to suggest that you check out the "Family and Friends" section of the forum as well as possibly go to an Alanon meeting. On the one hand, you certainly understand his drinking, since you are an alcoholic yourself, but on the other, it might be good for you to get a perspective from the Alanon/family/friend position, too.
Wishing you continued sobriety as well as strength in dealing w/this situation.
I'd like to suggest that you check out the "Family and Friends" section of the forum as well as possibly go to an Alanon meeting. On the one hand, you certainly understand his drinking, since you are an alcoholic yourself, but on the other, it might be good for you to get a perspective from the Alanon/family/friend position, too.
Wishing you continued sobriety as well as strength in dealing w/this situation.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Originally Posted by sober4myboys 
Thank you all. He has finally admitted that he does have a problem. I will be there for him and be positive, but I will not enable him, I won't do it.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 189
Bit of encouraging news. I talked to him last night and he sounds much better. He realizes that it is by God's grace that he is alive and WANTS to change his life. He wants to completely stop drinking and enjoy the things he used to enjoy.
I think I am going to get him some books on the different methods so he can decide what works for him... and maybe a few books like the Caroline Knapp so he can see where he is headed.
Thank you all.
I think I am going to get him some books on the different methods so he can decide what works for him... and maybe a few books like the Caroline Knapp so he can see where he is headed.
Thank you all.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
Originally Posted by sober4myboys
I am afraid that this was his last chance and he may not make it if he doesn't stop.
Any advice at all?
possibly
invite him to go to some AA meetings with you
for the alcoholic such as myself
drinking more can really lead to death
my friend was buried a couple of weeks ago
he was found drunk dead in his truck
he was a man who had it all
early retirement
a wife making 130 thousand a year
nice house
nice children
his daughter is also in the Program
he gave her a sobriety token just a few months back
invite him to go to some AA meetings with you
for the alcoholic such as myself
drinking more can really lead to death
my friend was buried a couple of weeks ago
he was found drunk dead in his truck
he was a man who had it all
early retirement
a wife making 130 thousand a year
nice house
nice children
his daughter is also in the Program
he gave her a sobriety token just a few months back
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 189
I'm so sorry about your friend, these stories should all make us try that harder to maintain sobriety.
I told him I will go to ten meetings a day with him if he wants me too, even though I like AVRT much better, but this is about him... not me.
I told him I will go to ten meetings a day with him if he wants me too, even though I like AVRT much better, but this is about him... not me.
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