Chronic Pain has removed all of my growth

Old 06-23-2013, 07:07 AM
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Chronic Pain has removed all of my growth

For the past year my left knee has been in pain rating on the one to ten scale between seven and ten constantly. I went through different phases of hiding and sleeping, fighting letting it affect my life, and last week I was told the doctors y have no her ideas besides knee replacement but I'm too young so they expect me to just live like is. In two months I get a better insurance and can and will pursue other doctors.
Well I spent a week spiralling out of control and my irrational overly emotional actions came to a head yesterday. I managed to keep most of my uncalled for jealousy and out of control feelings of abandonment to myself, so the spiral was mostly in my head and I did not cause any damage with any relationships. This morning I'm counting that as an aca win, I spiralled into full out aca but hurt no one permanently. However I can't seem to get the thoughts in my head to settle back where they should be. Because of the pain, and the burden, my abandonment issues are out of control and logically I know I selfishly want too much from those around me. No one can fix my life but me.
I'm having a hard time resetting my head post spiral. Today I was going to do a lot of housework (bad for the knee but good for the soul) then get a solid writing session in, and take my dogs to a pond so I can read and enjoy their goofy happiness.
I have been in a pretty good place for the last few month and this spiralling out of control definitely sucks almost as much as how it feels.
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Old 06-23-2013, 11:09 AM
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Good for you for handling things so well!

I really admire you, because pain is so difficult to endure and you practiced your healthy skills in spite of the terrible pain! You are doing great!
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Old 06-23-2013, 12:03 PM
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Hmmm... my pain was focussed on my jaw and my gums... being a long time migraine sufferer I was so used to it.

This was the focus of my misery. My misery was real. I was aware of the seasons for it. It was difficult, if not impossible to escape.

I spent many years as a field worker- my shoulders and elbows are worn out. I do have a gammy knee, but my wrists are holding out- so far.

Two years ago I was a total wreck. Wretched. My SO is a health worker. She told me about pain management.

Oh, but the cost! And travelling all the way to the city for a clinic! To be honest I feel strongly that there should be street corner clinics for routine stuff like this.

I am not advocating the route I took. But here it is. I went to my doctor and got some anti-inflammatories on prescription. Then I went through a 4-5 week course using over the counter pain killers as well.

Not my doctors orders... just my own initiative.

This gave my body defences a rest. And a pain holiday. I am okay now- I have to take it steady and am only working part time.

At the same time I am 'doing the programme' and keeping honest, and hopeful.

A good share, Payne.

DavidG.
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Old 06-24-2013, 09:31 AM
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Knee pain is not determined by age. You need to find a different doctor. I am PM ing you my knee story. Hang in there, it will get better!
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Old 06-25-2013, 04:28 AM
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I decided to approach this problem much like my recovery. I listed all the things that bothered me, allowed myself a few minutes to cry, scream, or pout. I then listed all the things I could do to relieve some pain and worked on ways I could implement as many as possible into my day. Finally, I listed the things I love and enjoy that I don't need my leg for. Reading. writing, training dogs, and so on. And created a schedule for myself to complete those things connected with rewards for completion. I'm hoping it will create a more positive association if I stick to it and help rid some of the negative and detrimental thoughts from my head. Once my brain is inline one this, I can start to resituate my healing as an aca. I have asked my frustrated but loving friends and "family" to be patient and the wonderful people they are, but that I may need some ti They were all very supportive and are giving me the space to fullfill my goals and give all of. Us back the person I want to be.
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