RJY9

I'm on day 9 today of being sober and i have drank heavily for about 15 years or so every day. I managed 69 days last year being sober and took that dreaded pint of lager at a wedding and didn't stop until recently. I felt OK after about 3 days but now i feel like crying all the time especially at around 4 or 5 o'clock on wards and i have zero enthusiasm for the things i love doing like playing guitar and reading and helping out round the house. When i was drinking i had all the enthusiasm in the world and was very creative and achieved stuff. Now i'm just feeling so dull and bored. I'm pleased my family life is on the mend as i was a bit of a hermit when drinking but i'm seriously starting to think i cant live with alcohol but also cant live without it. Really bored!! ( ps. I felt like this after the 69 days last year and thats why i started drinking again. Will it ever get better and will all the things i love doing come back to me without drink??? please heellp!!

GreenEggsAndHam

I'm right there with you. I can barely work without drinking. I complained in the June thread that I'm soooooo bored working.

I started a bored thread today as a matter of fact. Check it out here...maybe it will help a tiny bit. http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...t-alcohol.html

cascademn

RJ, what happens when you pick up the guitar? Do you get antsy? Can't focus? I had this too. Turns out it was booze cravings and not boredom. The fun thing is that they feel almost the same. I finally had to get out of the house and join a group on MeetUp to force myself through those feelings. I had to commit to things. The ants do go away.

hypochondriac

Yes and yes But it will take time and longer than 69 days and also a lot of work on sobriety related stuff. That has been my experience anyway. I am almost hesitant to say this because I wouldn't have thanked anyone for this at 9 days but I am 15 months sober and have only just got my energy and motivation back. It hasn't been awful this last year but I have been wondering what the hell was wrong with me. But I made it through the rough patch thanks to the patience of many here and a kindly doctor who congratulated me on my sobriety and suggested I may have been suffering from depression after getting over such a huge hurdle. Do not rush the process and do not give up on sobriety. That thought that you were better of drinking is a common one and certainly something I had, but you have healing to do before you start to see the real benefits x

doggonecarl

Welcome to SR.

Nine days is early. Expect change to take a little while. Your drinking didn't get bad the first nine days you drank. Healing isn't going to happen in nine days either.

Even 69 days is early. But if you don't improve in a couple months, the issue may be that you're just abstaining from alcohol rather than learning to deal with life without drinking. There is a difference.

Have you considered face-to-face support? Counseling?

strawberryblond

Congrats on day 9! I understand exactly what you're talking about. Day 5 for me, and I 'm coping with the blahs, too. Not that I don't have things to do, but mustering up the energy and interest to do them sober is proving to be quite a challenge. I hold onto what others have said, though. Just get through today without taking that first drink and wait this out.

BabyJane

I can really relate to this and I feel for you because I have been there throughout my recovery. Sometimes I miss playing my guitar drunk or going out dancing... I have trouble doing those things in sobriety. I suppose its a confidence issue, I don't think I'm a very good musician or dancer but I thought I was ok when I was loaded. Haha.

Everyone says we have to hold on. Be patitent. I have 7 months and the other day I wanted to quit because I was so down. The no energy / lethargic / blah feeling has been my constant companion. Like you, I want to resume hobbies and be out there doing the things I love but the motivation to get started again eludes me... At least so far...

The thing that keeps me going is good old "hope" - we can look at some of the people who have done this before and hopefully trust that what they say about slowly returning to normal and finding a better life is true. I do know people who ended up going back out over boredom and they all regretted it. So drinking is not the solution.

I hope you hang in there. I know its not easy but you can do it. I've been doing it for over 210 days and that's not me bragging about how special I am, trust me, I'm pretty average so I know you can do it too.

MIRecovery

Sobriety is all about choices and being bored is a choice. The sobriety gods are not going to bestow happiness on you. There are a million fun things to do sober all you have to do is do them. Sobriety is lifestyle not a diet

RJY9

Thanks so much for the replys on this. Really helps a lot. Im on day 12 now and finding it incredibly hard. Almost caved last night but resisted, don't know how but I did

2granddaughters

Quitting drinking is easy. Staying quit and enjoying living sober not so easy if you are an alcoholic like me.

I found the best solution for me in AA.

All the best.

Bob R

GreenEggsAndHam

Good for you! I had a really tough day the other day but resisted as well.

As it turns out, I'm not bored, just an addict. You can get through this!

IWillWin

I too struggle with this issue - I'm coming up on 10 months and although the obsession has been lifted (thankfully!) I find myself just sitting here a lot of the time and pondering the universe.

I realize that I'm slowly learning to live sober. Seems my 5 year stint of heavy drinking erased my memories of what it is like to just BE. I was to busy running around trying to be fabulous and successful despite my wicked addiction and stopped paying attention to life.

As many say here - I didn't become addicted in 10 months and I can't expect to be totally over the moon happy in that time either. But, I do know I'd rather be bored and trying to find my sea legs for life than sneaking chugs of 3$ wine in a closet.

Good luck to us all - let's find our happy places, one day at a time.

Nonsensical

After soaking your brain with happy juice for years, you've raised your hedonic setpoint. After stopping you'll experience months of anhedonia.

Dr. Kevin McCauley explains it quite well, I think.

7. Stress & Addiction - YouTube

It'll go away, but it takes a while.

Hang tough!

RJY9

You are all such a great bunch of people on here and I never realised the support I would get from writing a single post. Thank you so much everyone and I wish all the best for all of you too.

whipster

Wow that video is a great simple explanation. Was wondering why the things I loved to do for years now had little appeal, like fishing, water skiing, camping out...

Thanks.