ersatzmatriarch

so, i've heard about 'memory bubbles', and i've started having some since the booze has cleared out of my head. had another one just a bit ago i wanted to share... probably because it's the least painful one i've had, and feel a little more comfortable putting it out there.

i just took my kids to the new library in our neighborhood... and halfway there, hello, memory!

last time we went, i was looking for books on alcoholism (about two weeks before i joined SR.) it's a brand new library, and the shelves are still woefully empty. couldn't find any books on my own, so i asked for help (yes, i told the librarian i needed it for a friend. honestly.) anyway, she looked and couldn't find any either. i thanked her...

and then hussled my kids right out, all the while speaking freely and none too quietly about how much "this library sucks! what a piece of crap this place is. we're never coming back to this pathetic excuse of a library!"

as you may have guessed... i was far from sober that day. the memory is a but foggy still, but guessing at the time we were there, i was probably one whole bottle of red into my day.

a drunk mom, kids in tow, looking for books on alcoholism for a 'friend', full of rage when no books could be found. classy disease, ain't it?

but you know what? i don't ever have to do that again! i can wake up every morning and say, "i'm not drinking today." (which is exactly what i said again first thing this morning, for the 18th day running.)

i'm grateful to have a chance to choose sobriety everyday.

thanks for letting me share...

lessgravity

Lord the amount of drunk trips I've taken kid in tow to the library. Happy for you.

least

Living sober is so wonderful. I'm glad I quit drinking so I could truly enjoy my life.

Dee74

fantastic post EM - thanks

D

Anna

That's a great post, and it's those kind of memories that can help you to remain in recovery.

Nuudawn

Glad to read this right now. Thanks for sharing.

FreeFall

Congrats on 18 days and thanks for sharing your story.

I spoke with an addiction doctor who I knew through his wife about resources for a friend. lol I'm sure he thought I was the friend, until about halfway through the conversation when I told him I had recently quit for almost 11 months. He then seemed to believe that I really was talking about a friend.

Nighthawk8820

So thats what those flashbacks are called huh, memory bubbles? I like it, Im going to use that. Ive had my fair share, but I get them more and more now after the anniversary of my 2nd years of sobriety. They aren't embarrassing to me at this stage of my life, nor do I feel guilty. Its nice to just feel, and not be numb. To process them for what they are and be able to move on, in a healthy way. They remind me of how far I come, so I usually like them.