SUZQN2

I've been looking for some helpful words on the Internet today and found this site. My son's birthday is this week; he'll be 42...YIKES! He recently relapsed after 7 years clean and sober. We don't live in the same town (about 4 hrs away). I don't have his current phone # but write to him on facebooks sometimes. Although now I don't think he looks at fb. I have learned to remove (or use very cautiously) some words from my vocabulary: NEVER, ALWAYS, MUST, IF ONLY, and WHAT IF, to name a few. I have replaced the old adage: “no news is good news” to “no news is no news”. With no news right now I stay in the moment and accept that bad news, good news, world news, whatever news may be occurring, is not for me to dwell on. Put simply, until presented with news of any kind, I can live today, in this moment. Easy for me to say this but not always easy to think it and worse, I still worry about him. Hoping this site will help me get through this...if there ever is a "get through this."

Bubovski

Your word replacements and cautious use is really good.
Letting go trusting, hoping, and trying within reason are good ones.
I got into AA twenty years ago at 50, became a 'moderate drinker' only to crash in Jan of this year. Back at meeting;its never too late.

wolfpackfan45

Hi SUZQN2. My 22 year old son is a recovering alcoholic, and I too know the worry and fear that a mom goes through. I understand totally. It's like nothing else. I don't know if you go to Al-Anon meetings or not, but they've helped me immensely. I also see a counselor and am on an antidepressant in order to deal. All these thing have truly helped me to deal with it. I know what you mean by the "if there ever is a get through this". I struggled with knowing that there is always the chance that my son will relapse. Once I found out he was an alcoholic I knew my life would never, ever be the same again. When our children are ill and suffer, we suffer. But, I've learned to take care of myself. It took me awhile to accept the fact that I couldn't fix my son or control his disease. It's hard. Really, really hard. We want the best for our children, no matter what age they are. Hang in there. You'll make it through this. You will. There are other moms out there that understand completely.

suki44883

Welcome to SR, SUZQN2. You have found a place full of people who understand. We have a forum for friends and family of alcoholics. I think you will find a lot of support there. Here's a link...

Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

least

I'm glad you joined our family!

Hevyn

Welcome Suz! I'm very glad you found us. You'll find that many here are going through the same thing. I hope it'll help relieve your anxiety to share your feelings about what's happening. I'm so sorry you're having to go through this.