New member needs help
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 17
New member needs help
My drinking has became completely out of control. It has destroyed so many parts of my life but I always go back to it and it always ends up way worse than before. I have quit on a few very brief occasions. My daughter is getting to the age where she knows what is going on. That is what scares me the most, I don't want her to see me like this ever again. I am determined to give it up for good. Thanks in advance for all the support, this seems like a great group to get the help I need to finally get the demon of alcohol off my back.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 94
Originally Posted by joe8526 
My drinking has became completely out of control. It has destroyed so many parts of my life but I always go back to it and it always ends up way worse than before. I have quit on a few very brief occasions. My daughter is getting to the age where she knows what is going on. That is what scares me the most, I don't want her to see me like this ever again. I am determined to give it up for good. Thanks in advance for all the support, this seems like a great group to get the help I need to finally get the demon of alcohol off my back.
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
Welcome Joe. I'm on my 8th day sober and I feel great. I've spent a lot of time here this past week reading and posting. Stay close..it's an awesome lifeline. Congratulations to you for the decision to change.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 17
Thanks, congrats on day 8. It is day 1 for me so I can only imagine how much better I will feel on my day 8. I plan on spending lots of time here, the cravings are the worst for me but now I have a great support group to help me say no to them. Thanks again.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 17
Somewhat but nothing in stone. Lots of water and healthy food to keep my blood sugar in check. I have read that this will help with the cravings. Get back into Church and focus on family. I know my alcoholism has allowed me to neglect the people I love so I have some repair to do there. Luckily I have a very supportive wife and kids that have put up with me when the alcohol has allowed me to not always make them my first priority. I have some medication to help with the anxiety that will hit soon. Also I need to exercise, probably lots of walks in the evening with my wife and our dogs. I just have to remind myself every minute of every day that I am an alcoholic. I will never be responsible enough to handle alcohol so I can not allow it to be part of my life, ever. Oh, and use this website for support and help keep me accountable for my actions.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,785
Getting off work was a trigger for me too. Get home and make a drink.
Let the dog out, change clothes, glance at the mail? Nope, First thing was to make a drink.
The best advise I have is to keep your mind busy. Take that walk. Take it twice if you have to. You will find after several days that the urgent feeling to get home is not so urgent anymore since the drink is no longer your first priority. Others start to take its place.
Let the dog out, change clothes, glance at the mail? Nope, First thing was to make a drink.
The best advise I have is to keep your mind busy. Take that walk. Take it twice if you have to. You will find after several days that the urgent feeling to get home is not so urgent anymore since the drink is no longer your first priority. Others start to take its place.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 17
That was exactly my routine. Go home and fix a drink, then basically sit around and do nothing cause it would interfear with my drinking time. I am looking forward to getting back into the stuff I loved to do before but couldn't cause I was drinking. I am also excited to finally have a little extra cash instead of wasting it all on alcohol.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,785
Originally Posted by joe8526
That was exactly my routine. Go home and fix a drink, then basically sit around and do nothing cause it would interfere with my drinking time.
Now I have all this free time on my hands and it feels pretty good. It used to feel like there was never enough time between the time I got home from work and the time to go to bed but there was. I was really just worried there was not enough time to get drunk.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 17
Yeah, the cravins and triggers are what worry me the most. The physical withdrawal will not be fun but luckily for me when I did quit in the past the symptoms were normally pretty mild. It is the cravings and the delusions that I will be able to control it this time that I struggle with. I know I can't control it, I never will be. I simply can not allow myself to have alcohol and I have to constantly remind myself of that.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
For me it really helped to have an actual plan for what I was going to do, rather than just plan to "not drink". A checklist, a calendar in your smartphone, a little notebook, whatever.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Jacksonville, Florida
Posts: 4,038
I have posted this before to help with cravings....hopefully some of the suggestions may help you. I can only share what others have shared with me because I never experienced the physical craving for alcohol that many of us have. Some say that exercise helps, also eating something sweet.
Here is some information on cravings you might find helpful:
Having stopped alcohol use, the frequency, intensity and duration of cravings differ from person to person. The bad news is they occur; the good news is that over time they generally lessen in frequency and duration.
The trick is to stay safe while riding out the wave. One way to view abstinence and sobriety is simply preparing for that moment when a craving occurs, nobody is watching, and nobody would know if you used, except you. What do you do?
What follows are some tips and tools that may get you through that moment of danger. Not all tips work for all people, the trick is to find the one that will work for you.
1. Buy yourself some time, distract yourself with exercise, work or cleaning, get busy. Put yourself in a safe place where alcohol is not available. Cravings pass with time.
2. Play the movie forward....remember that we are talking about 'just one'. Once you pick up, control goes out the window.
3. Talk to someone. This is the purpose of building a social network, utilize it. Go to a meeting, call your sponsor, best friend, relative or counselor. Talking it out with someone who really understands helps prevent a return to active alcoholism.
4. Pray or meditate. Ask for help in just getting through this. Use the Serenity Prayer. The point is to ask for help outside yourself.
5. Remember the pain and bad times, and the fact that you would be risking everything good that you have worked so hard for. Try focusing in the positive, not drinking and all the reasons you should not do it.
6. H.A.L.T. Hungry, angry, lonely, tired: If you are in any of these states, fix it. Eat, sleep, chill out, go visit someone.
7. Remember a craving will pass with time and when it's through, you come out on the other side even stronger.
Hopefully this information will help you. Just remember the craving will pass. I will be thinking of you.
Here is some information on cravings you might find helpful:
Having stopped alcohol use, the frequency, intensity and duration of cravings differ from person to person. The bad news is they occur; the good news is that over time they generally lessen in frequency and duration.
The trick is to stay safe while riding out the wave. One way to view abstinence and sobriety is simply preparing for that moment when a craving occurs, nobody is watching, and nobody would know if you used, except you. What do you do?
What follows are some tips and tools that may get you through that moment of danger. Not all tips work for all people, the trick is to find the one that will work for you.
1. Buy yourself some time, distract yourself with exercise, work or cleaning, get busy. Put yourself in a safe place where alcohol is not available. Cravings pass with time.
2. Play the movie forward....remember that we are talking about 'just one'. Once you pick up, control goes out the window.
3. Talk to someone. This is the purpose of building a social network, utilize it. Go to a meeting, call your sponsor, best friend, relative or counselor. Talking it out with someone who really understands helps prevent a return to active alcoholism.
4. Pray or meditate. Ask for help in just getting through this. Use the Serenity Prayer. The point is to ask for help outside yourself.
5. Remember the pain and bad times, and the fact that you would be risking everything good that you have worked so hard for. Try focusing in the positive, not drinking and all the reasons you should not do it.
6. H.A.L.T. Hungry, angry, lonely, tired: If you are in any of these states, fix it. Eat, sleep, chill out, go visit someone.
7. Remember a craving will pass with time and when it's through, you come out on the other side even stronger.
Hopefully this information will help you. Just remember the craving will pass. I will be thinking of you.
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