McKrazy

This is obviously light-hearted, but also..... well, frighteningly something that's "danced on my brain". Please pray for me. I find myself right now feeling so "ripe" for romance. And since there seems to be nothing new on the homefront, I find myself basking in male appreciation from any front. My H is good at complimenting between the insults, so they all seem to zero out in the end. Luckily, no serious contenders, just nice male friends and acquaintenances will say something or give me a hug, and man, I just don't want to let go. It just seems a dangerous place to be and I don't want to do something so stupid, and deep down I don't think I ever would, but heck, the attention is so nice and I'm so needy..... well, anyway, please pray that this, too, will pass, and I wont crave this so much. I'm generally so level-headed and steady, I feel somewhat foolish admitting this.
Thanks for listening,
Pam

smoke gets in my eyes

Admitting is good. Those stray hairs of thought that get caught in your mental bathtub drain need to be removed before you get a serious plumbing problem.

Hugs!
Smoke

Daffodil

McHappy,
Foolish! NO. Human. Yes! Glad to know you are human. We all like praise and the more needly I am it seems the more the praise SEEMS to mean to me.

Inside I know I can only do the the best I am capable of doing. When I can get that to my heart I know I am getting better in recovery.

I also have come to the realizaion that I can champion myself instead of waiting for someone else to.

(smoke) Thanks for my first cuckle today!)

amarie

McTired, I too have been longing for attention from my AH and am feeling very lonely at this point. There is an older guy at work that likes to play this little flirting game with me. He always makes sure that he sits next to me and everyone knows thats "his seat". It's really quite comical. I do find myself attracted to him, but I think it's mainly because he pays attention to me. I don't get that at home. He's really a nice guy and we have alot of fun together. He knows about my situation and I think he feels sorry for me. Anyway I like the attention. He even said one time that I'm beautiful. (I'm really not but it felt good hearing it.) My Ah never pays me any compliments. Oh well at least I have something to look forward to when I go to work. I can always count on him to make me laugh!!

Lorelai

((McTired))
I've felt the same way. While I know that I would never cheat on my H (it's just not in my chemistry), I am sometimes afraid of the feelings I get regarding other men. I think that is one of the reasons I stopped going to the gym and went back to wearing old jeans & t-shirts, no makeup, etc. When I start looking good, I'm almost afraid of the attention I get.

I've been wondering whether wanting men to think you are pretty, smart, funny, etc. is a normal, healthy thing or if I am just transfering my codie behavior onto different people? Is it OK for a woman to want a man to find her attractive or is that something I need to work on? I'm a little confused on that point and any opinions would be appreciated.
amarie - I think you're beautiful and I don't even have to see you to know that.
Thanks - L

amarie

I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting attention. God knows we deserve if for all that we go through. Lorelai--Don't stop making yourself look good and feel good. If it gets you attention--SO WHAT?? As long as you know your limits and don't cross any lines that you don't want to, I don't see what the problem is. To me it sounds more like you feel guilty if you look good. What is there to feel guilty about?? Maybe if you dress up, put make up on, you might feel better about yourself. I don't think that's a crime. I think it's called LIVING!! I am wearing contact lenses, make up, get my nails done and make sure I hide the grays and guess what? I feel great. And it also makes my AH wonder what's going on. Let him wonder. I'm starting to live life for me, not him and I don't feel guilty at all. Take care