Am I an alcoholic as well?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 37
Am I an alcoholic as well?
Hi - I just have a question. I identify myself as an addict - many drugs were involved but the most used was ephedrine and weed, though alcohol played a role as well, sometimes as a back-up plan when I couldn't get my drugs of choice. My rock bottom included divorce, bankruptcy, and psychiatric problems. I get a lot out of NA meetings but recently have been going to a lot of AA meetings as well and I love them. When I am there I do not want to disrespect the group by talking about other drugs (outside issues). Lately though I have wondered if I am actually an alcoholic too. I am wondering if I should be ok with the term "alcoholic" when describing myself. I would love to hear anyone's opinions on this based on some of my behavior with alcohol...
Things I have done with alcohol: There had been times when I drank socially, sometimes it would go too far, other times not. I have snuck drinks behind my wife's back, usually late at night, drank vodka out of the bottle and replaced the missing vodka with water so that it looked like nothing was gone, hid my own stuff in the house (such as vodka or whiskey like wild turkey), always drank while using other drugs (usually to "get me going"), I have drank so much that I urinated in the house - not in the toilet - not realizing what I was doing, went to bars (usually strip clubs - I am not proud) and drank alone.
I realize no one can tell me who or what I am but I would love to hear your opinions as this is really bothering me. I just don't want to feel like a poser or dishonest. I am really all about honesty these days.
Thank you in advance...your sharing/opinions are welcome and I really appreciate it!!
Things I have done with alcohol: There had been times when I drank socially, sometimes it would go too far, other times not. I have snuck drinks behind my wife's back, usually late at night, drank vodka out of the bottle and replaced the missing vodka with water so that it looked like nothing was gone, hid my own stuff in the house (such as vodka or whiskey like wild turkey), always drank while using other drugs (usually to "get me going"), I have drank so much that I urinated in the house - not in the toilet - not realizing what I was doing, went to bars (usually strip clubs - I am not proud) and drank alone.
I realize no one can tell me who or what I am but I would love to hear your opinions as this is really bothering me. I just don't want to feel like a poser or dishonest. I am really all about honesty these days.
Thank you in advance...your sharing/opinions are welcome and I really appreciate it!!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Gulf Coast, Florida USA
Posts: 5,731
Originally Posted by lojoe 
Hi - I just have a question. I identify myself as an addict - many drugs were involved but the most used was ephedrine and weed, though alcohol played a role as well, sometimes as a back-up plan when I couldn't get my drugs of choice. My rock bottom included divorce, bankruptcy, and psychiatric problems. I get a lot out of NA meetings but recently have been going to a lot of AA meetings as well and I love them. When I am there I do not want to disrespect the group by talking about other drugs (outside issues). Lately though I have wondered if I am actually an alcoholic too. I am wondering if I should be ok with the term "alcoholic" when describing myself. I would love to hear anyone's opinions on this based on some of my behavior with alcohol...
Things I have done with alcohol: There had been times when I drank socially, sometimes it would go too far, other times not. I have snuck drinks behind my wife's back, usually late at night, drank vodka out of the bottle and replaced the missing vodka with water so that it looked like nothing was gone, hid my own stuff in the house (such as vodka or whiskey like wild turkey), always drank while using other drugs (usually to "get me going"), I have drank so much that I urinated in the house - not in the toilet - not realizing what I was doing, went to bars (usually strip clubs - I am not proud) and drank alone.
I realize no one can tell me who or what I am but I would love to hear your opinions as this is really bothering me. I just don't want to feel like a poser or dishonest. I am really all about honesty these days.
Thank you in advance...your sharing/opinions are welcome and I really appreciate it!!
Things I have done with alcohol: There had been times when I drank socially, sometimes it would go too far, other times not. I have snuck drinks behind my wife's back, usually late at night, drank vodka out of the bottle and replaced the missing vodka with water so that it looked like nothing was gone, hid my own stuff in the house (such as vodka or whiskey like wild turkey), always drank while using other drugs (usually to "get me going"), I have drank so much that I urinated in the house - not in the toilet - not realizing what I was doing, went to bars (usually strip clubs - I am not proud) and drank alone.
I realize no one can tell me who or what I am but I would love to hear your opinions as this is really bothering me. I just don't want to feel like a poser or dishonest. I am really all about honesty these days.
Thank you in advance...your sharing/opinions are welcome and I really appreciate it!!
Are you asking because you want permission to drink ? Just askin?
I am an alcoholic/addict. My hubby is just an addict.
He abstains from any and all alcohol even though he never had a problem with alcohol. He would have 2 beers at a cookout and stop. I abstain from all.
But as far as you labeling yourself an alkie. Only you can do that and it doesn't really matter. You said you are an addict and you go to NA. Alcohol is a drug. It is a mind altering drug in liquid form. To attend AA all you need is a desire to stop drinking. if you have that desire you are welcome.
If you don't think you are an alkie, you can still go to a meeting and when it comes your turn to introduce yourself you can say My name is lojoe and I have a desire to stop drinking. Never seen it done before but would love to. No one can label you an alkie but yourself. If someone comes up to you and says something , tell um "Read the 3rd Tradition much?" lol
I do AA and NA. But I find more experience in an AA meeting. Like you I just say I am an alkie in AA. In NA I say I am an addict.
Whatever makes you comfy. God Bless!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 37
Hi deeker and thank you for your response! I am not wanting permission to drink...I am just wondering if I am an alcoholic and just never thought of it that way before...because when I think back my use of other drugs clouded the issue but I treated alcohol the same as the others when I didn't have them, it just wasn't my drug of choice. I know it seems trivial - but I am really just wondering if anyone else identifies like I do and calls themselves an alcoholic. I am just trying to figure myself out. Thank you again.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Hi lojoe 
I think only you can make that call about being an alcoholic, but I certainly did most, if not all of those things.
It certainly sounds to me like alcohol caused you a few problems?
D
I think only you can make that call about being an alcoholic, but I certainly did most, if not all of those things.
It certainly sounds to me like alcohol caused you a few problems?
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Gulf Coast, Florida USA
Posts: 5,731
Originally Posted by lojoe
Hi deeker and thank you for your response! I am not wanting permission to drink...I am just wondering if I am an alcoholic and just never thought of it that way before...because when I think back my use of other drugs clouded the issue but I treated alcohol the same as the others when I didn't have them, it just wasn't my drug of choice. I know it seems trivial - but I am really just wondering if anyone else identifies like I do and calls themselves an alcoholic. I am just trying to figure myself out. Thank you again.
The Solution?
excerpts form AA Big Book, reprinted with Permission of AA World Services.
The Solution?
We know that while the alcoholic keeps away from drink, as he may do for months or years, he reacts much like other men. We are equally positive that once he takes any alcohol whatever into his system, something happens, both in the bodily and mental sense, which makes it virtually impossible for him to stop. The experience of any alcoholic will abundantly confirm this.
Can you stop drinking once you start. Have you developed the phenomenon of craving?
If alcohol is causing you problems and you want to quit drinking, I don't see why you can't go to AA meetings and identify as an alcoholic.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 37
Thank you for the responses. I know that when I drink I usually go searching for my other drugs of choice... As far as starting and stopping it was hard to predict. I have had cravings before. Especially when I got clean.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Gulf Coast, Florida USA
Posts: 5,731
Originally Posted by lojoe
Thank you for the responses. I know that when I drink I usually go searching for my other drugs of choice... As far as starting and stopping it was hard to predict. I have had cravings before. Especially when I got clean.
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 3,065
I'm an addict which means I get addicted to any mind alerting substance, including alcohol. It's last on the list of drugs of choice but I will use it in absence of all else or to enhance other substances 
. It's all the same to me.
. It's all the same to me.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: US East Coast
Posts: 1,972
Originally Posted by lojoe
I am thinking I am an alcoholic but it was masked by my addiction to other drugs - if not I am an alcoholic waiting to happen...anyone elses opinions or thoughts are welcome.
Grateful
Join Date: May 2013
Location: NC
Posts: 1,763
lojoe,
My DOC was alcohol but I had a problem with pills as well for a couple of years. I also did other drugs but it was an occasional thing. I probably could have gotten addicted to them too if I had more access to them. I go to AA but I think I would be just as comfortable sitting in an NA meeting and calling myself an addict. I've come to the realization that if there is a substance that is physically addicting and it makes you feel good there is a pretty good chance I would get addicted to it given the opportunity. I have to stay away from it all or it will lead me back to my DOC, alcohol.
My DOC was alcohol but I had a problem with pills as well for a couple of years. I also did other drugs but it was an occasional thing. I probably could have gotten addicted to them too if I had more access to them. I go to AA but I think I would be just as comfortable sitting in an NA meeting and calling myself an addict. I've come to the realization that if there is a substance that is physically addicting and it makes you feel good there is a pretty good chance I would get addicted to it given the opportunity. I have to stay away from it all or it will lead me back to my DOC, alcohol.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 37
Thank you all again....one last question: Am I experiencing the phenomenon of craving as described in the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous (wanting more than planned once you take one drink) when I take a drink and then want other drugs (not just alcohol) when I originally had no plan to use them in the first place?
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 3,065
I'm the same as you. Alcohol is last on my list but I will reach for it in absence of all else or to enhance other drugs.
I still refer to myself as a addict as it encompass all mind altering substances. I know I can't touch any of them.
I still refer to myself as a addict as it encompass all mind altering substances. I know I can't touch any of them.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 37
I guess im thinking im not an alcoholic. Not a real one, as they say. Even tho the 3rd tradition would allow me to be welcome, I wouldnt really feel like I belonged so ill just*stay away*even tho I love AA. The story of my life is that I just dont fit in. Anywhere. Never have and never will. You are beautiful people thanks for helping me. I shall continue wandering alone
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Canada. About as far south as you can get
Posts: 4,768
Originally Posted by lojoe
I guess im thinking im not an alcoholic. Not a real one, as they say. Even tho the 3rd tradition would allow me to be welcome, I wouldnt really feel like I belonged so ill just*stay away*even tho I love AA. The story of my life is that I just dont fit in. Anywhere. Never have and never will. You are beautiful people thanks for helping me. I shall continue wandering alone
Nobody told you to stay away from AA ... YOU DID. You made that decision!
Those are precisely the kinds of decisions we need a sponsor to catch and correct. Left on our own we self-destruct.
All the best.
Bob R
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