Kys

I can't believe I've done it, but of course this is just the start of my journey.

Many things I could say, and a few of you here probably know part of the journey I've been on when I joined in Feb.

I first came here looking for 'solutions' to use alcohol to taper off, and my how thankful I am that some kind hearted people helped me see how riddled with failure that is, but they of course very much supported my efforts. Ultimately they encouraged me to see a GP, I did, and have used safe and temporary medication to stop drinking.

I didn't succeed straight away, sure I had stints of success, but nothing like the success I've had this time.

So what's changed? It's just a week right? Well I can tell you. I learnt, I mean I really 'learnt', it was key for me, I wouldn't repeat something if it ended up that I was back in the beers, which resulted in an endless circle of oblivion.

I don't use the word oblivion lightly either. You might think 'it won't happen to me' right, I definitely thought that. Thought I had some control, surely. For one I slowly started to see parts of my career unravel. Many other things too, more important things, a relationship, other life prospects etc. However with these things in mind and coupled with learnings like I said, I tackled this, head on.

I clearly remember one day I was walking down the street and noticed an attractive girl who 'once upon a time' I'd have been excited at the prospects of being a positive human being having noticed, excited that I'm outgoing and could meet people like that. Then I remembered my current alcoholic state would never allow me such opportunities. Odd example maybe, but the claustrophobic headspace where alcohol kept me hopefully paints the picture of how I was reminded I'd never be able to pursue anything truly valuable in life, let alone a simple date. Alcohol was the centre point of my life, all revolved around that, and all ultimately got thrown away. Repeat.

Sober Recovery. It feels like this place is too good to be true at times, like it could just be taken away. I know that's very far from the truth though. I hope anyone reading this, and especially those who have helped me, understand how truly amazing this place is. I owe much of my recovery to you guys. To be honest, I don't think I'd be where I am now without SR, I mean that.

So it's a week, I know there's plenty more weeks to go. It's not so much the days spent sober I'm excited for at the moment (but believe me I am!) as much as it is what I've changed. And I changed it. Should I falter, I'll be quick to remind myself what I changed, and that I changed it. 'Falter' is not something I'll let kick me around though. Not anymore.

Thanks for reading, and again a special thanks to those who have helped me, the above is a take on my journey so far, and I hope for your continued support and that I can give something back also. This will remain my key weapon in fighting alcohol.

Natom

Congratulations on your first week. I tried moderation more than once and it just never worked. I used to think I was one of the best people to be around when I was using. I completely get the 'attractive girl' scenario. At parties I would try and act like a player and then when I got home I'd look at myself in the mirror and see how crap I looked and then like you realised I could never have anything truly valuable. And that's how my life went for years.

I'm just over a year into my sobriety. It gets better the further you get along. You have to want it. Put as much effort into your recovery as you did into drinking and you're on the right course. Just keep it going, slowly but surely. Don't rush anything and take one day at a time. I personally found stopping using rather easy compared to staying stop. It's something that involves constant recovery maintenance for me. Good luck in your recovery

Natom.

Kys

Thanks Natom. Stopping using vs. just staying stop - I completely agree, for me pretending the problem wasn't there never helped me, if that makes sense.

I've definitely invested in ongoing recovery maintenance like yourself.

Kys

And this!

tootsl1

Keys, the right frame of mind will make all the difference, I certainly could never give up until I accepted I will never drink again. Wow how much easier is life now that drink cannot and will not be an issue!
Still early days for me too, but like you, I felt the difference this time and knew, just knew, this time would be the last day one

Good luck and strength Kys

Dee74

way to go Kys - and I can guarantee SR is not going anywhere

D

Kys

Thanks for the support Dee