MissMushroom

I recently got drunk put my friend in a terrible position and now she is not speaking to me. I keep going over it and I'm finding it so hard to forgive myself.

I don't know what to do if she won't talk to me.

There is a part of me that is beginning to think she won't ever understand.
It makes me so sad.

MissMushroom

Also, I have been going through this alone as I can't find the courage to tell my folks the real extent. I have an appointment with an alcohol counsellor on Thursday to try and make sense of my situation and see what help I need etc.....

thanks for reading

ScottFromWI

Sometimes only time will heal the wounds MM. Just as you are the only one who can quit drinking, others can only forgive you when they feel the time is right. The best way to prove it to them is to stay sober and move forward.

Mountainmanbob

EverySngleNight

Rejection from friends (plural). Yes. It really sucks. Allow some time. Maybe send a text and offer to meet for coffee. Prepare what you'd like to say. Apologize & Ask forgiveness.. Then just listen. The other BIG part of asking for forgiveness is atonement. IF your friend forgives you, you will need to put time and work in to get back what you lost. That means never making that mistake again. I haven't asked forgiveness, yet, but I have apologized. I want to make sure I can atone before asking that. Currently- I need a LOT of work before making those promises. And it's up to them, in the end, whether they want to forgive or not. I feel your pain- I really do. :-(

MissMushroom

I hope everything works out for you and I too feel your pain.

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Dee74

I think it's best to focus on you now Miss M.

There'll be plenty of time later to talk to people and try and repair damage, make amends etc.

Your friend probably wants and needs some time too.

D

MissMushroom

thanks for the very kind words

Lovelivelaugh

Congrats on making an appointment with the counsellor. A very brave step and definitely one in the right direction. Eventually time will heal wounds but ultimately as Dee says focus on making you right then look at relationships. By then your actions to change your life will speak a thousand words

Torso

Contact her, tell her that you are going to a counsellor, that you feel so bad you aren't going to drink again. Then let her know you know you've really upset her and you will leave it up to her to contact you when she is ready.

Then go concentrate on you staying sober!

FeenixxRising

Time Miss Mushroom. Don't attempt to force the issue right now; you're friend will almost certainly be defensive and not ready to hear you out just yet. In a few weeks you could maybe write a letter of apology.

Have you decided to stop drinking? Or was this an unusual drinking episode for you? Either way, you should forgive yourself, even if your friend doesn't. Personally, I don't hold grudges, and I suspect your friend probably won't either.

MissMushroom

I blacked out on Thursday and, well, did some crazy **** that I cannot remember and probably won't. Before that I hadn't drunk since February. Before that was my birthday in December. I was a social binge drinker and had been for years. I clearly ignored the alcohol related depression & anxiety and the first time I blacked out will be the last for me. I am going to do everything to make sure that I am fully aware of what happened to me and not to fall into a binge drinking habit again.

With regards to my friend: I've been in touch a few times just to say how sorry I am and that I have taken this very seriously. I've ordered some flowers to send to her tomorrow. I am going to give her space and respect that she doesn't want to know me right now. I hope in time she will calm down and perhaps understand that I blacked out.

I also have accepted that she may never want to talk to me. If that is the case, then, it will be the biggest life lesson. In many ways it is a blessing that I didn't put us in a life threatening experience.

Thanks to you all for taking the time to read and share your thoughts. I appreciate it a lot.


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