Terry77

Everything I've read states that *most* alcoholics can't quit without help...so for the ones that don't have help, how do they do it?

Anna

I think most of us have help of some kind.

My help was in the form of books and then I eventually found SR and have used that as my lifeline for many years.

RobbyRobot

Everyone has some kind of help, sooner or later, even if its just talking whatever over with a couple of friends or family.

Not everyone uses organized institutional help, or program help though.

I guess "help" is such a general term too with plenty of personal meanings and understandings respectively for all of us as individuals.

Torso

My help is here, apps that I have downloaded on my phone.
So far it's working!

And I know me, going to f2f meetings would probably be counter productive as i'm so socially awkward, but I hear it works for most.

least

My help was from this site and from my counseling sessions. It's been working for over three years now.

Pedro1234

My only assistance is SR and i am doing fine to date (day 36) You need to be ready mentally and be determined to stop drinking. Post lots about how you feel and listen to all of the advice that comes your way from SR. Most important just take it a day at a time and keep yourself really busy. Avoid temptation and as silly as it sounds just don't have that first drink

BikerAcct

Only 33 days for me, so I won't pretend to be an expert. I quit smoking cold turkey, decided I wanted to lose weight and did it, and I finally (after a DUI) Decided I can no longer drink. I hope I am as successful with this, as I was with those.

I use SR, books I'm reading, and phone apps, as reminders of how far I've come, where I've been, and the road ahead. I'm not against social means of support, meetings and such, but from my experience with groups in differing settings, the people that attend often have their own agenda's and those often differ from the groups stated goals.

Gee, that kind of sounds like the atmosphere at my office!

Pete55

That's a very good question,

The "help" can simply be one alcoholic sharing their experiences of recovery with another alcoholic. This helps to stay sober and go on to other things such as learning to live sober.
So it becomes a way of life without alcohol.

Hevyn

Hi Terry. Well, I had to do it or die - so I was highly motivated & running out of time. I was in the process of losing everyone and everything. By the time I found SR I was ready to listen to the advice and experience I found here. It was mostly the people on this site - and books that saw me through.

wheresthefun

As mentioned above: books, SR, talking to certain people.

Also, for me, I did things kind of bass ackwards. I did some pretty heavy lifting in therapy over a decade ago now. I began seeing a therapist for depression and because my marriage was ending. Turns out, all that stuff was the best thing that ever happened to me. Although my therapist never really spent time on my alcohol "problem" we did deal with everything else. This woman got me to experience true happiness and contentedness for the first time in my then 42 years on the planet.

Anyway, what I'm leading up to, is I did all the "hard work" so many talk about that goes along with quitting drinking/substances way before I quit the drinking. But, because of that, all I really had to deal with was the stopping drinking part, and not to rub it in to anyone, it was pretty GD easy. In fact, I was just telling my wife last night, that I've come to a point in my life, as I approach two years as a non-drinker, that nothing could ever happen that would make me want to drink again. Not even if in some alternate universe, I would be promised that I would experience none of the "bad" things that go along with drinking. When I think back on it now. I can't believe I ever even liked "the buzz", I have no desire to experience that every again.

As Lao-tse said after tasting the vinegar, " Life itself, when understood and utilized for what it is, is sweet."

totfit

While one may read a lot about few being able to quit on their own, it is likely because the ones that do don't talk about it. The fact is studies show that most quit on their own. That just means without any "formal" type of program or treatment. It most certainly helps life in general to have support of friends, family, work, and a good social structure, whether it be participation in church, clubs, activities of life in general. As to the how most people do it is I think they find something better to do. That sounds kind of simplistic and is in a way. Find a passion that takes the place of drinking is really I think the key. Exercise and a good diet and anything else that naturally improves mood is most certainly an asset also.

caboblanco

How do alcoholics quit that don't use any support systems? They just do. I believe a lot of heavy drinkers still have a full and exciting life with goals they want to meet and activities they enjoy. When they decide to give up drinking they still have a lot to live for. In fact i think quality of life is the biggest factor in whether someone can quit drinking. Some alcoholics may meet a very stable, loving person and get into a relationship and that in itself gets them to stop or moderate drinking.

Pondlady

My "help" came in the form of this site, reading and lots of walking where I talked things over with myself. I should also add that I tried moderation the year before, knew it didn't work, and was ready to quit.

SereneEdition

Most things I have read said that most people can't quit period, with formal programs batting the same average as going it alone.

I don't care about the averages too much tho as I'm determined to be sober. For my personal sobriety the outcome is binary, making the value of statistics pretty much null.

Like prego - I believe that there are different 'best methods' for different people, not one universal 'best' way. Try out a few and see what works for you.

GroundhogDay

Strong support from family and church. I am also a fan of AVRT. SR is important to me to keep connected with others who have chosen abstinence. I can get advice and give back.

Also made radical change to lifestyle. Quit job, got more involved with my community, started doing volunteer work and challenging myself in new and creative activities.

ScottFromWI

My "help" is SR. I tried moderation and it didn't work. I have not had any formal counseling, or support from organized groups/programs other than reading and posting a lot here. I can't really give a defining moment or magic wand, I just looked at my life and health as it was and decided enough was enough. Granted I am still just a hair over 4 months so I still consider myself very new to sobriety.

deeker

Have you done a study ?

According to AA's General Service Office in NYC there are an ESTIMATED 1.4 million members in US and Canada and 2.1 million worldwide as of January 2012. Estimate used because AA groups do not keep nor do they report membership details or numbers. The above estimate comes from a tri-annual survey of AA members. There are NO CONFIRMED members of AA due to anonymity and aforementioned non-reporting by groups. See for official AA report. http://www.aa.org/en_pdfs/smf-53_en.pdf


I like these estimates better. I especially like um cuz I went, took the suggestions, did um, and I am sober and happy! And everyone I know who did the same are sober and are regaining their broken lives. I respect this program because it is spiritual in nature and gets down to the 3 folds of our illness. Drinking was just a symptom of a much deeper problem.



I guess that's why How it works says Rarely Have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path, those who do not recover are people who can not or will not completely give themselves to this simple program.

All Excerpts and Material Reprinted and Linked with Permission Of AA World Services, inc

IWillWin

My strength came from someplace deep inside me that I didn't even know I had. I just knew I wanted to do it, tried as hard as I could, became as educated as I could (thanks SR!) about what was happening to me both physically and mentally, and then I picked a date and did it. (to clarify, I had several failed attempts for about a year or so before it stuck, I like to think it was because my toolbox wasn't full yet!)

Once my withdrawal was over, I went to AA meetings and enjoyed being around others who understood what I was going through and they did help especially those first crucial months. Now, 8+ months of choosing a sober life, I don't find myself wanting to attend AA but I'm very,very glad it is there if I need it. Otherwise, once the fog lifted and I started living with a clear head, I've gotten busy doing just that.

I remain vigilant in my commitment to sobriety and use this site now as my primary tool - it helps to remind me that I don't know where I'm going but I sure know where I've been. And SR reminds me that I never, ever want to go back. Ever.

soberlicious

Don't believe everything you read.
I decided that no matter what...I was not going to put any more alcohol in my body.

deeker

If there is something that works why not try it? Simple program. Let me rephrase, if what you are doing doesn't work, check it out.