Alcian

It has almost a year since my husband has been sober. I am very proud of him for that and not relapsing once. He has become a very difficult person to live with. He just seems so unhappy alot of the time and so serious. Is this normal? He has also pushed away alot of people that used to be friends. Drinkers and non drinkers. He has also become very critical of others. When I bring this stuff up to him he just shuts down. I am trying to be supportive but I guess I need some more insight.

I have even went to a therapist to help cope with being a codependent. I just do not know what to do? I find myself here asking for insight. I feel our marriage is falling apart.

sugarbear1

is he attending AA? Is he working another method of recovery?

alcohol is only a symptom of the real problem.

have you tried Al Anon? or here: Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Alcian

He was doing Life Ring up until a few months ago. He said, he does not need it anymore. He also stopped seeing his program counselor just in the past 6 weeks. I told him I thought he still needed to see a therapist.
He is doing a great job with no alcohol and taking care of himself. But I do believe there is some underlying problems he needs to deal with. He is just so critical of other people and pretty much pushed away everyone except our kids and myself.

DisplacedGRITS

yeah, when people start quitting what's worked for them, that's a big danger signal. he should get back into a program but pushing him into it probably won't work. have you brought these observations to him? are you feeling isolated because of his isolation? i guess all you can do is sit down and tell him how his behavior is impacting you. don't tell him what to do. just let him know that, while you're happy he's maintaining sobriety, since leaving his program and therapy, your quality of life had deteriorated. you'd like to see him content again and right now, he isn't acting like a person who's content in their sobriety.

1newcreation

Sounds like this man typing this out right now in first 6mths of sobriety! I was dry drunk & hated evthg around me that reminded me that now I've to face up to life:court cases, probation, no work, AW still all up in my face demanding of me even after putting the bottle down etc. Then I heard guy in my home group say why be miserable but dry? Big bk says to be happy joyous & free. I'm still working on it but I've come a loooong ways.so give him some more time.
Tell him to stick to network & sponsor & maybe will start showing some hopeful signs

Alcian

Thanks for the input. I told him he should go and see a therapist. I was researching dry drunk and was kinda thinking along that road. I don't want to see him slip. Our kids have noticed how much short tempered their dad is since he has been sober. I just want to see him happy and perhaps more social. I don't think this is a healthy for him mentally right now. Unfortunately he does not think their is nothing wrong with him and that I am the one with the problem and unhappy. Right now he is shut down and not really talking to me. Which is usual when I lay it out and tell him what I am thinking.