Future Tripping
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Join Date: Apr 2013
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Future Tripping
Hello,
I have a lifelong problem with "what iffing" or the new term I see here which I really find funny is future tripping. I am having anxiety symptoms currently from the little hamster that is constantly whirring in the wheel in the back of my head. I am asking for input from the group here on some tips to address this problem.
I'm already a big fan of the Serenity Prayer and often just focus on the key words as I walk around. I need a bigger arsenal and welcome input.
Many thanks!
I have a lifelong problem with "what iffing" or the new term I see here which I really find funny is future tripping. I am having anxiety symptoms currently from the little hamster that is constantly whirring in the wheel in the back of my head. I am asking for input from the group here on some tips to address this problem.
I'm already a big fan of the Serenity Prayer and often just focus on the key words as I walk around. I need a bigger arsenal and welcome input.
Many thanks!
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Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
i think a lot of the future tripping comes from not feeling in CONTROL of the situation or the outcome. and also not having a firm foundation in TODAY that assures that WE are gonna be ok no matter what. we must learn to be self reliant, instead of other-reliant - toss out the IF-THEN-BUT chart. what happens in life just happens, it's NOT personal - that's where we so often get hung up....on the WHY MEEEEEEE'S.
we can certainly hedge our bets against catastrophe - earthquake kit, bit of cash stashed away, fully inflated spare in the car - but none of our preparations affect what WILL happen, only that we are slightly more prepared in the event.
we can do the same with addicts/alcoholics in our lives....be prepared, take precautions, enact safety measures and when the hurricane starts a'blowin' seek cover or get the hell out of dodge.
we can certainly hedge our bets against catastrophe - earthquake kit, bit of cash stashed away, fully inflated spare in the car - but none of our preparations affect what WILL happen, only that we are slightly more prepared in the event.
we can do the same with addicts/alcoholics in our lives....be prepared, take precautions, enact safety measures and when the hurricane starts a'blowin' seek cover or get the hell out of dodge.
Journey To Me
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Kyle, Texas
Posts: 395
Originally Posted by AnvilheadII 
i think a lot of the future tripping comes from not feeling in CONTROL of the situation or the outcome. and also not having a firm foundation in TODAY that assures that WE are gonna be ok no matter what. we must learn to be self reliant, instead of other-reliant - toss out the IF-THEN-BUT chart. what happens in life just happens, it's NOT personal - that's where we so often get hung up....on the WHY MEEEEEEE'S.
we can certainly hedge our bets against catastrophe - earthquake kit, bit of cash stashed away, fully inflated spare in the car - but none of our preparations affect what WILL happen, only that we are slightly more prepared in the event.
we can do the same with addicts/alcoholics in our lives....be prepared, take precautions, enact safety measures and when the hurricane starts a'blowin' seek cover or get the hell out of dodge.
we can certainly hedge our bets against catastrophe - earthquake kit, bit of cash stashed away, fully inflated spare in the car - but none of our preparations affect what WILL happen, only that we are slightly more prepared in the event.
we can do the same with addicts/alcoholics in our lives....be prepared, take precautions, enact safety measures and when the hurricane starts a'blowin' seek cover or get the hell out of dodge.
Thank you CodeJob for this topic. It matches my problem almost exactly. I wish I had something new to offer, but I was seeking insight on this as well. Hopefully you get as much out of the other poster’s posts as I did from Anvilhead’s answer.
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Thanks so much MTS Slide and Anvilhead! I recalled Mark Twain had a good quote about worrying which I looked up: "I have been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened."
He is such a sly fellow that Samuel Clemens!
I've been worrying something awful that rehab thought home was a discharge option when it is not. So I spoke up for myself today. I called the intake/transition person at (R)AH's rehab and spoke up that I wanted to be sure they were working on finding (R)AH a GOOD sober living placement because HOME was NOT an option. (R)AH's rehab is out of state and once I discovered that not all sober living places are great places, I wanted to be sure his team was using the remaing two weeks to locate a decent placement since we are not in their usual referral area. Intake is going to make some inquiries locally and relay back to (R)AH's counselor. I called his counselor for the first time yesterday, and called again today when I did not hear back. We finally connected and had a good conversation. He knows home is not an option. When he offered to accept any recommendations for sober living placement, I informed him intake was going to work on some recommendations and would be in touch with him. I don't know if that was a codie test, but heck I have no idea and it is NOT MY JOB. He seems to grasp that I need some space to keep working my own recovery in peace. I am not in control of (R)AH's recovery, but I spoke up for what I needed. I need this space to keep building my self reliance and also be sure I won't rain down expectations on (R)AH when he discharges.
He is such a sly fellow that Samuel Clemens!
I've been worrying something awful that rehab thought home was a discharge option when it is not. So I spoke up for myself today. I called the intake/transition person at (R)AH's rehab and spoke up that I wanted to be sure they were working on finding (R)AH a GOOD sober living placement because HOME was NOT an option. (R)AH's rehab is out of state and once I discovered that not all sober living places are great places, I wanted to be sure his team was using the remaing two weeks to locate a decent placement since we are not in their usual referral area. Intake is going to make some inquiries locally and relay back to (R)AH's counselor. I called his counselor for the first time yesterday, and called again today when I did not hear back. We finally connected and had a good conversation. He knows home is not an option. When he offered to accept any recommendations for sober living placement, I informed him intake was going to work on some recommendations and would be in touch with him. I don't know if that was a codie test, but heck I have no idea and it is NOT MY JOB. He seems to grasp that I need some space to keep working my own recovery in peace. I am not in control of (R)AH's recovery, but I spoke up for what I needed. I need this space to keep building my self reliance and also be sure I won't rain down expectations on (R)AH when he discharges.
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Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Texas
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I think there are some stickies in the Anxiety section of the forum that may help. I turn to them when my anxiety gets really bad.
Anyway, yes, thanks for sharing. This is my situation as well.
The key to the matter is, as Anvil said, worrying affects nothing. I try to subscribe to the idea of letting myself have 15 minutes of hardcore anxiety per day. Then, I find something to do. Anything distracting. Sometimes it is hard to get going because anxiety is so paralyzing, but once I do, i almost always find that I can function better and that it lifts my mood at least a little.
Anyway, yes, thanks for sharing. This is my situation as well.
The key to the matter is, as Anvil said, worrying affects nothing. I try to subscribe to the idea of letting myself have 15 minutes of hardcore anxiety per day. Then, I find something to do. Anything distracting. Sometimes it is hard to get going because anxiety is so paralyzing, but once I do, i almost always find that I can function better and that it lifts my mood at least a little.
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Anchorage, Alaska
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I believe I have received a PhD in future-tripping at my age!
I work on it every day, and have gotten so much better at catching myself when I do.
Here's how I rationalize myself out of it: I can handle anything that life throws my way. I know this now. So worrying about the future is pointless. I will simply deal with it when it presents itself.
Believing in my ability to handle whatever comes my way really helps return my brain to the moment.
And recognizing the future tripping comes from my own irrational fears also helps.
I work on it every day, and have gotten so much better at catching myself when I do.
Here's how I rationalize myself out of it: I can handle anything that life throws my way. I know this now. So worrying about the future is pointless. I will simply deal with it when it presents itself.
Believing in my ability to handle whatever comes my way really helps return my brain to the moment.
And recognizing the future tripping comes from my own irrational fears also helps.
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Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Northern CA
Posts: 95
This is a very timely thread for me. I have been "future tripping" because I don't know what's going to happen since I was served with separation papers 2 weeks ago. I have been trying to stay in the moment/day but find myself slipping into fear. I do believe its about control or lack of - like AnvilheadII said.
I had started working on step 1 about a month ago and haven't done much since I was served. I started working the step again yesterday.
I am trying to trust that God has a plan for me and that everything will work out.
I'm trying to make each day the best it can be - I won't get a "do over". It's been difficult though - I really have to fight the fear inside but I know what I need to do to overcome it so I just have to keep reminding myself.
I had started working on step 1 about a month ago and haven't done much since I was served. I started working the step again yesterday.
I am trying to trust that God has a plan for me and that everything will work out.
I'm trying to make each day the best it can be - I won't get a "do over". It's been difficult though - I really have to fight the fear inside but I know what I need to do to overcome it so I just have to keep reminding myself.
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Thanks SolTraveler for recommending the anxiety board. It turns out I have had big issues with anxiety and OCD like behaviors since I was small. I am almost in tears to realize I have been white knuckling my way thru life with all sorts of anxiety and thought everyone was just better at coping than me! My issue with future tripping is more than normal worry and I will address this with my counselor next visit. I've got a lot more going on than just being codependent. Yikes!
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