Need advice on therapist situation - rant
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 458
Need advice on therapist situation - rant
So I have had 3 appts with a therapist. I didn't really know what to expect, but I have not been impressed:
1) Upon meeting, she seemed truly concerned about getting my copay immediately. To the point of playing with her printer for about 5 minutes to get it to work to print me a receipt.... all during my clock time.
2) She always winds the appts down with many minutes to spare
3) She would not shake my hand when I left during our first appointment- I found this to be very awkwark. She mentioned something about germs.
4) It is like talking to a friend, who patiently listens. No advice, no suggestions, no writing assignments, etc... What do therapists do other than sit and listen?
So here is the biggest issue (rant):
1) Last week she called me to move last weeks Friday appt from 2pm to 11am. I could not accomodate. So she called again and asked me to move it from 2pm to 12:30pm, which I did
2) Yesterday at noon she called me to confirm my noon appt for today. I did confirm, but about 1/2 hour later I realized I had a business committment at 12:30 that I could not move. I called her back within 1 hour of confirming, and left VM that I made a mistake and could not come at noon. But I could come at 11:00 or 2:00. She left me a message to call her back. I called her back this morning and left another VM. She just called me back, and stated that even if I rescheduled for today at 2pm, she would still have to collect a $50 cancellation fee plus the $25 copay for 2pm appt today.
I asked "Seriously?" I cancelled/requested a reschedule within 22 hours of my appt. She stated that her policy is 24 hours, and she would need to charge me. I brought up her "last minute change last week that I accomodated for her," but she replied "thats just the way it is."
So I told her to not bother rescheduling, as I will be looking for a new therapist. She stated that if I change my mind to call her back. But I still owe her the $50.
Since she is no longer my therapist, do I need to pay?
1) Upon meeting, she seemed truly concerned about getting my copay immediately. To the point of playing with her printer for about 5 minutes to get it to work to print me a receipt.... all during my clock time.
2) She always winds the appts down with many minutes to spare
3) She would not shake my hand when I left during our first appointment- I found this to be very awkwark. She mentioned something about germs.
4) It is like talking to a friend, who patiently listens. No advice, no suggestions, no writing assignments, etc... What do therapists do other than sit and listen?
So here is the biggest issue (rant):
1) Last week she called me to move last weeks Friday appt from 2pm to 11am. I could not accomodate. So she called again and asked me to move it from 2pm to 12:30pm, which I did
2) Yesterday at noon she called me to confirm my noon appt for today. I did confirm, but about 1/2 hour later I realized I had a business committment at 12:30 that I could not move. I called her back within 1 hour of confirming, and left VM that I made a mistake and could not come at noon. But I could come at 11:00 or 2:00. She left me a message to call her back. I called her back this morning and left another VM. She just called me back, and stated that even if I rescheduled for today at 2pm, she would still have to collect a $50 cancellation fee plus the $25 copay for 2pm appt today.
I asked "Seriously?" I cancelled/requested a reschedule within 22 hours of my appt. She stated that her policy is 24 hours, and she would need to charge me. I brought up her "last minute change last week that I accomodated for her," but she replied "thats just the way it is."
So I told her to not bother rescheduling, as I will be looking for a new therapist. She stated that if I change my mind to call her back. But I still owe her the $50.
Since she is no longer my therapist, do I need to pay?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 3,095
She sounds totally unprofessional and since she is the one who flip flopped all over changing the appt it doesn't sound fair that you pay.
However, it may just make your life peaceful and cut all ties with her if you just pay the $50?
Most of all I am so sorry you had to deal with such an unprofessional sounding therapist.
However, it may just make your life peaceful and cut all ties with her if you just pay the $50?
Most of all I am so sorry you had to deal with such an unprofessional sounding therapist.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 1,295
Geesh. I've seen this type of thing over and over again. Therapists after their money and otherwise not invested whatsoever in the person seeking therapy.
There are some very lazy therapists out there.
As for the "mmm" and that's it results, I can pay a person on the street $10 an hour to "mmm" and nod at me.
Yes, find a new therapist. Good for you. You have to shop around, and it can be a very expensive test run.
Yes, you have to pay her, else have it on your credit report.
There are some very lazy therapists out there.
As for the "mmm" and that's it results, I can pay a person on the street $10 an hour to "mmm" and nod at me.
Yes, find a new therapist. Good for you. You have to shop around, and it can be a very expensive test run.
Yes, you have to pay her, else have it on your credit report.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
Dear Crazed, I say, yes---by all means---find a new therapist. Look at it this way---in the overall, it may save you some money. What if you got 4-6wks. in and confirmed your suspicion that she is not the therapist for you--then you would be out of a whole lot more money.
Finding a good fit for a therapist is so important---but, it can be tricky.
Good luck to you.
sincerely, dandylion
Finding a good fit for a therapist is so important---but, it can be tricky.
Good luck to you.
sincerely, dandylion
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Anchorage, Alaska
Posts: 4,719
Shop for a therapist like you would any other service. And remember that some people are drawn to the profession because they are equally sick individuals.
Now, I have to ask - are you specifically seeking a woman for a purpose? Maybe a man would be a better fit? And I ask that because its something to consider. My first round of therapy when I was 29 and divorcing, I chose a very assertive older woman for a reason...I need her wisdom and guidance. The second round I chose an alpha male...I needed to learn what I could from him. I went to therapy with my clearly identified set of needs and chose the therapist according to that.
Don't hesitate to be strategic about this - it is your own well being here, after all.
~T
Now, I have to ask - are you specifically seeking a woman for a purpose? Maybe a man would be a better fit? And I ask that because its something to consider. My first round of therapy when I was 29 and divorcing, I chose a very assertive older woman for a reason...I need her wisdom and guidance. The second round I chose an alpha male...I needed to learn what I could from him. I went to therapy with my clearly identified set of needs and chose the therapist according to that.
Don't hesitate to be strategic about this - it is your own well being here, after all.
~T
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: northeast
Posts: 468
She sounds pretty quirky. I think she's being very annoying about the cancellation fee given her request of rescheduling. I'd be tempted not to pay it and see what she does-
How strongly do you feel about it?
And, keep looking for another one that fits better. Sorry this one didn't work out.
How strongly do you feel about it?
And, keep looking for another one that fits better. Sorry this one didn't work out.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: SAN FRANCISCO
Posts: 1,176
Crazed,
You might want to look into Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
You will get some very concrete suggestions on examining your thought processes and they will even give you homework assignments (I had a few).
Therapists are not allowed to dispense advice, a lot of it is listening on their part.
Good luck, sometimes it takes a while to find the right fit.
You might want to look into Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
You will get some very concrete suggestions on examining your thought processes and they will even give you homework assignments (I had a few).
Therapists are not allowed to dispense advice, a lot of it is listening on their part.
Good luck, sometimes it takes a while to find the right fit.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: somewhere south
Posts: 510
She cannot charge you the copay for a visit you did not attend. That is fraud. She cannot bill the insurance if you no show, that is also insurance fraud. She may or may not be able to charge you a cancellation fee. She can try but likely cant enforce it. I would hold off on paying it. The likelyhood is she will do nothing with it. It will cost her more in legal fees than the $50 she is trying to recoup from you.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,103
Glad you are searching for a new therapist. Interview them, explain that you are looking for someone who can offer advice and suggestions not someone to just listen.
How were you apprized of her cancellation policy? Was it that day over the phone or does she have that policy written on a sign in her office? Did she state that at your first appointment?
How were you apprized of her cancellation policy? Was it that day over the phone or does she have that policy written on a sign in her office? Did she state that at your first appointment?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 458
Thanks all.
I have seen in movies where a special bond forms between patient and therapist. I was hoping it develop into a full blown affair, and would help me get over the alcoholic that put me in therapy.
..... Just kidding
I actually called a local rehab clinic and asked for recommendations on nearby therapists that specialize in dealing with addiction/codependency issues. She was one of the two they recommended. The other recommendation was, ironically, the therapist of my EXAG, which was a big "No Go" for me. It is a small world.
She will not be billing the insurance company. And regarding the $50-I will probably just pay it and put it to rest.
are you specifically seeking a woman for a purpose
..... Just kidding
I actually called a local rehab clinic and asked for recommendations on nearby therapists that specialize in dealing with addiction/codependency issues. She was one of the two they recommended. The other recommendation was, ironically, the therapist of my EXAG, which was a big "No Go" for me. It is a small world.
She will not be billing the insurance company. And regarding the $50-I will probably just pay it and put it to rest.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 458
How were you apprized of her cancellation policy? Was it that day over the phone or does she have that policy written on a sign in her office? Did she state that at your first appointment?
Her office is in a shared office space- not really a dedicated office. So no, I never really knew the exact terms of the policy. (I can take ownership of that, as I should have)
But I am aware that most if not all Dr appts have cancellation/no-show fees, and I do abide by them. Unfortunately, the time of this appointment was an oversight. I thought I made it for 11, but I actually made it for noon. I am upset because I let her know within 22 hours.... but her policy is 24 hours.
Her loss- she could have made 1000s off of my insurance company with all the snakes in my head
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 453
As if it isn't hard enough getting there sometimes, right?
Looking for a therapist for myself was a new experience, but I had the experience of helping others locate them. I knew that I should look for a CADC or addiction specialist, I wanted someone that did marriage or family counseling, and I wanted a woman. I checked Health Grades, the Better Business Bureau, and my insurance carrier's provider look-up...cross referencing I came across several in my area. When I called for a first appointment, I confirmed her expertise & briefly discussed my situation.
My therapist explained the first 10 minutes or so of my first session would be filling out the insurance paperwork, but once it was done we were set. Maybe you could ask your next therapist to fax/email you the paperwork in advance so you have it ready to go rather than wasting appointment time completing it?
My therapist mainly listens, but she asks probing questions to make me think about my situation and does make suggestions about what I should educate myself about or work on in between sessions. It has really helped me understand why I am where I am and what I want/need moving forward.
Good luck.
Looking for a therapist for myself was a new experience, but I had the experience of helping others locate them. I knew that I should look for a CADC or addiction specialist, I wanted someone that did marriage or family counseling, and I wanted a woman. I checked Health Grades, the Better Business Bureau, and my insurance carrier's provider look-up...cross referencing I came across several in my area. When I called for a first appointment, I confirmed her expertise & briefly discussed my situation.
My therapist explained the first 10 minutes or so of my first session would be filling out the insurance paperwork, but once it was done we were set. Maybe you could ask your next therapist to fax/email you the paperwork in advance so you have it ready to go rather than wasting appointment time completing it?
My therapist mainly listens, but she asks probing questions to make me think about my situation and does make suggestions about what I should educate myself about or work on in between sessions. It has really helped me understand why I am where I am and what I want/need moving forward.
Good luck.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 148
Originally Posted by unsureoffuture 
She cannot charge you the copay for a visit you did not attend. That is fraud. She cannot bill the insurance if you no show, that is also insurance fraud.
And she wouldn't shake your hand??? Wow!!
Sorry Crazed...hope you find a good therapist to make up for this one.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 2,163
"I have seen in movies where a special bond forms between patient and therapist. I was hoping it develop into a full blown affair, and would help me get over the alcoholic that put me in therapy." Crazed)
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
There's the laugh I needed for today, thanks crazed!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
There's the laugh I needed for today, thanks crazed!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 458
And she wouldn't shake your hand??? Wow!!
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Central Valley
Posts: 131
You don't owe her a dime. I would not pay it, you are under no obligation to fork out any money from your own pocket.
Don't let the 'insurance police' tell you to pay it to make you feel better - what's going to happen? There is no law that says you have to pay for services NOT rendered?
If your insurance calls - on the therapists behalf - which they more than likely will not - explain just as clear as you described to us what happened and that you owe nothing.
As for what to expect from a therapist - I can only offer probably not the best advice - I was shuffled through many as a child/teenager with 'boderline' behavior issues of various descriptions and affilictions. I have learned that some therapists have sort of 'scripts' they may use for all patients. Bear in mind SOME do. Most were ineffectual with me and I saw right through them and tired of the same feigned concern for my problems.
I did have some excellent therapists, especially the one who told my parents that I was just a young girl with a big imagination who didn't fit any 'mold' and to leave me alone. (1970's princess/cheerleader did not apply to me at the time).
My advice is - if you feel at all uncomfortable with this person, they cannot help you, period.
Don't let the 'insurance police' tell you to pay it to make you feel better - what's going to happen? There is no law that says you have to pay for services NOT rendered?
If your insurance calls - on the therapists behalf - which they more than likely will not - explain just as clear as you described to us what happened and that you owe nothing.
As for what to expect from a therapist - I can only offer probably not the best advice - I was shuffled through many as a child/teenager with 'boderline' behavior issues of various descriptions and affilictions. I have learned that some therapists have sort of 'scripts' they may use for all patients. Bear in mind SOME do. Most were ineffectual with me and I saw right through them and tired of the same feigned concern for my problems.
I did have some excellent therapists, especially the one who told my parents that I was just a young girl with a big imagination who didn't fit any 'mold' and to leave me alone. (1970's princess/cheerleader did not apply to me at the time).
My advice is - if you feel at all uncomfortable with this person, they cannot help you, period.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New York
Posts: 877
Crazed, you're hilarious.... I wouldn't pay that terrible woman. Or at least wait until asks again for the money. Jeez, what a b*tch.
There are A LOT of bad therapists out there. Trying to find a good one is a challenge.
There are A LOT of bad therapists out there. Trying to find a good one is a challenge.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 458
The first thing I did after our phone call was called my insurance company. They stated it is not an insurance issue, but could be a legal issue. So the insurance company has no dog in this fight (assuming she doesn't submit anything for the appt I missed). And because it could be a legal issue, they would not advise on how to proceed.
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