allthatsgood

I thought I was doing so well...found some peace, was feeling good. Then all of of a sudden all these questions and thoughts started entering my mind. Is he really still clean and sober, is he still going to meetings, working a program? All of a sudden I'm worrying once again. Several weeks ago he moved out of his sober living facility after being there for ten months. He told me it was time to get a place of his own , which he did. Is this what set my worrying in action? I don't know but am feeling very down.

LoveMeNow

Awe, I am sorry allthatsgood. I think the change would cause most of us some anxiety. Of course you know, he is going to do what he is going to do and worrying wont change a thing except hurt you.

I think it's kindeyes (or Ann) who says.....if you pray why worry, if you worry why pray. I learned to really value those words.

You are in my prayers.

Lily1918

for me the SLE and drug tests and rehab were a band aid. when he got out I relapsed into ky codie thoughts and behaviors.
everyone is different. but I felt like my band aid was ripped off before the wound was healed.

allforcnm

I wouldnt be so hard on yourself. I think it is somewhat normal to experience a bit of anxiety over such a big change; moving out of sober living, and rejoining a more normal life where he is on his own. Im sure you got comfy knowing where he was, and over time his recovery showed its consistency and sober living was part of it. I had similiar anxiety with my husband at various points in his first year of recovery. There was coming home from rehab after 3 months... going back to work... travelling for work a couple times... etc..

But it helped me to think of them as stepping stones.. for him.. and for me.
It sounds like your son has been embracing recovery, and it is really a good thing he feels like it is time for him to graduate and move forward with his life. Could it de-rail him, sure it could. And if it does, then he has a very good network at his disposal to help him, including his great mom' -I know this for a fact.

My anxiety didnt get too severe, but if yours doesnt calm shortly then reach out for some help for yourself; talk therapy or whatever you choose. This is a stepping stone... it has to happen.

HopefulmomtoD

This is a critical time in his recovery as he makes the transition from sober living to living in the "real world". Just try and comfort yourself and remind yourself that all of that worrying won't change a thing- you are powerless.

He knows what he has to do.

(And, I completely understand how your feeling- I'd be the same way.)

allthatsgood

LMN, Lily, Allforcnm and Hopeful Mom, thank you all for your support! You are all right in the sense that this change has taken me out of my comfort zone. I have to learn that there will be many other changes like this and I just have to breathe and move forward. I don't understand myself, I have no reason to believe that he is doing anything different as far as his recovery. He is still getting together with the people from the SLE and stops by there every week. I know I have to just keep on doing what I was doing before this change...going on my walks, going to yoga and enjoying things I put on hold for so long.