peacedove

As you know, I am brand new here. My emotions are not all over the place but they are not under control either. Why am I starting to question myself with things like "Did you do everything you could?" or "Are you going to look back one day and regret any of this?" Ohhhhhhh, it isn't that I think I am missing out on something wonderful somewhere with him-- I was there--I know how it was going--I know how it turned out--I know there was no real love or even FUN in the end. This is the mind game portion creeping in on me, right? Or wrong? And is this even normal to have happen suddenly? I've been educating myself here and I "see" the heartache I felt as well so why is this happening now? Will it stop?

AnvilheadII

it all takes time, hon. and the questioning, totally normal. are you familiar with the stages of grief? those what if's and did I do enough's are part of the bargaining stage....it's a necessary part, if we are willing to face it and move thru it, to finally ACCEPT that it was what it was and it just didn't work out. and that's ok, because that's how life goes....

it's like the first time you try a new recipe, and it's new and different so you aren't at your most confident, and you do your best....and it does NOT at ALL look like the brochure!! and then upon review you discover there was a missing key ingredient.

in the future, if you wish, you can try that recipe again, with different utensils and making sure you have all the ingredients on hand. and even then, it still might not come quite right. it's not the end of the world, it's just the current result of the effort.