Midlifecrisis

Me and my posts going around in circles. It's going I be all over. I've 30mg left from Monday to last me until Tuesday, its Thursday morning now and I've had 10mg and codeine and burden and have major headaches already. 30mg was my brekky yesterday. My husband is so upset. I've got a doctors appointment today to tell her everything and a drug and alcohol appointment tomorrow and they are going to send me to the hospital detox and not tell them about the eating disorder I think.

I can't believe my life has come to this. My husband was so upset last night I had so so many pills to deal with it. He knew I'd been taking more but not the extent I guess.

I'm so terrified.

Anyway, off to dress up day at play group for now.

Dee74

I'm not sick of you MLC. I hope you'll find the help you need.

I don't get the bit about the eating order tho - who are 'they' and why is that better a secret?

D

trachemys

If we get sick of each other, we die.

You keep coming here and you keep leaoing on us and we'll keep leaning on you and we'll all get through this together.

OK?

This is the lifeboat. All hands to oars.

Impurrfect

((MLC)) - I'm not sick of you, either. I do have to admit, I think the eating disorder needs to be addressed along with the other stuff. From what I understand, eating disorders are just another way of trying to control things we can't, just like the drug usage?

I pray that you will get to the bottom of this, that you will believe that you deserve a life without using, eating disorders, etc. You do. WE all see it in you.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

Mizzuno

Detox? This is great news MLC. Wonderful to hear. It will be good for you. Being terrified is perfectly acceptable. I understand. Please do not let your fear stop you from doing the right thing. Your children need you. You can do this MLC.

aussieblue

Best wishes for the detox. Sending strength your way.

LadyinBC

I'm not sick you either. The best thing to do is to keep posting here. We all have to help and look out for each other. That is what this site is all about!

Midlifecrisis

Dee, you would be familiar with HADS at the royal Brisbane? They kick you out if you have an eating disorder or self harm. Atods said they may not mention it because i am running out of options. It has been pretty under control but always flares up without drug use. They said there's no counselling just medical detox. Moonyah is where I would like to go but they can't take ma at this level of benzo use.

I have no choice but to go back to the doc today and be completely honest that I've none left nearly. She seemed pretty up with benzo stuff so she won't leave me to go cold turkey I don't think.

Dee74

I'm very familiar with the RBH, but not familiar at all with the HADS programme MLC.
If thats the way ATODS is playing it, then I'll shut up

D

Midlifecrisis

No please don't shut up. Do you know other options?

Hevyn

We just want you to begin to heal and have a happy life. However that has to happen, it'll be worth it. I think it would be more terrifying to continue on the path you've been on.

Dee74

Yoiu should know I never really shut up

I never went through rehab or detox MLC.
I should have, but made bad decisions.

Without spending money, I think ATODS is your best bet for now but I'll look around and let you know if I find anything else.

D

Anna

I am glad you're going to detox.

Midlifecrisis

It's just keeping quiet about the ed so I can actually get into a detox. There's no other options. Will get counselling for ed as well but after. First thing I need to do is get off these damn drygs

Pondlady

MLC,
From what I've read of your posts, and if I understand things correctly, you've been placed in a difficult situation of having to prioritize your health problems......as a high dose of benzo rules out one place and ED another.

I think the important thing is you're seeing your doctor and being honest. I'll be thinking of you and hoping you're able to start detox.

Midlifecrisis

You're exactly right. At docs now waiting. So nervous. Thankz

Midlifecrisis

Of course the ed needs to be addressed. It's an even bigger issue than the drugs. At the moment the drug situation is getting dire so I need to get off them. The amount of services that deal with both are zero thanks

Midlifecrisis

At doc now. She's scared for me. Talking to a senior doctor. I've been honest. This is it.

Mizzuno

Your in the right place MLC. Hugs to you. This chapter can come to a close and you will get your life back. Im proud of you MLC. We are all here for you.

Midlifecrisis

Another script