Getting sober diary
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 12
Getting sober diary
Hello,
I just posted my introduction, you can find it in the recent threads. In it I stated my intention to keep a diary of my journey to getting sober.
Maybe I'll write every day, maybe every couple of days. I'll just write if I have something to say.
As you can see in the intro post, I'm starting tomorrow. Today I'm drinking. So from tomorrow on, it's on. Funny enough I feel excited about it and not afraid. I look so much forward to having it out of my life completely and all the benefits that will bring.
So right now, I've had a drink. And I will, to be honest, have a lot more. I can't get myself to throw the rest out. This will be the last time though. Tomorrow I will wake up and the journey begins. And I'll post about it here.
I'm posting it here for myself and for others. For myself to really get sober and get it out of my life, hopefully with the input of others who have been down the same road. And also for others as inspiration, motivation or whatever they can take from it.
I'll post again tomorrow.
I just posted my introduction, you can find it in the recent threads. In it I stated my intention to keep a diary of my journey to getting sober.
Maybe I'll write every day, maybe every couple of days. I'll just write if I have something to say.
As you can see in the intro post, I'm starting tomorrow. Today I'm drinking. So from tomorrow on, it's on. Funny enough I feel excited about it and not afraid. I look so much forward to having it out of my life completely and all the benefits that will bring.
So right now, I've had a drink. And I will, to be honest, have a lot more. I can't get myself to throw the rest out. This will be the last time though. Tomorrow I will wake up and the journey begins. And I'll post about it here.
I'm posting it here for myself and for others. For myself to really get sober and get it out of my life, hopefully with the input of others who have been down the same road. And also for others as inspiration, motivation or whatever they can take from it.
I'll post again tomorrow.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Athens, Georgia
Posts: 962
For what it is worth:
1. Do the Crash Course on the AVRT website
2. Make your Big Plan, SOBER
3. When you Start your SOBER Journal, change your name, delete 'going to be'
4. I look forward to the new SOBER YOU, and the SOBER journal posts.
1. Do the Crash Course on the AVRT website
2. Make your Big Plan, SOBER
3. When you Start your SOBER Journal, change your name, delete 'going to be'
4. I look forward to the new SOBER YOU, and the SOBER journal posts.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 12
Day 1 just turned into day 0... 
However today was both a failure and a blessing.
I went to the store to get some groceries and bought booze as well. The reasoning was "Ah well, since I'm going to quit, this one last time won't matter". I can't remember how many times I've thought that over the past year, but it justifies my actions in my mind.
As I walked out of the store, off-course I realized what was going on and that I was fooling myself. So this time, instead of going straight home, I walked to my brother's house. He lives a 10 minute walk away from me. He knows about my problem but didn't know yet that I wanted to quit.
So I got to his place and explained everything. And I told him that I needed help. He said that he'd be there for me and we agreed on a plan.
In a way he's my sponsor even though he's never even touched a cigarette. Never had any issues with drugs, never used them. He does drink a little bit every once in a while, but it's never been problematic for him.
So this is what we agreed on:
I gave him my wallet and all my money. I have zero cash. Which is cool, because it means that I cannot buy my second round today, which means that I can drink 50% of what I usually would max.
For the next couple of weeks, whenever I need to buy something, we will go together and he will pay with my money. I will not, under any circumstance except for a real emergency get access to it myself.
I have to call him each day before noon. If I haven't called, he will call me and check up on me. And he'll insist that I do keep to our agreement. At no point am I allowed to turn off my phone.
After we called, I must come visit him and talk about how it's going. Unless I'm too sick, then he'll come visit me. And he know's when I'm bs'ing him.
At the end of the day I must send him an e-mail with my current status. If I don't he'll call me again.
If I don't respond at all, he'll come to my place. I've given him a spare key. He'll assess the situation and take action. If there is even the slightest hint of a need for medical attention, he'll call a doctor.
In general he'll keep a close look on my overall condition and if he thinks medical attention may even be remotely necessary, he will make me call the doctor myself. The point is that I need to do as much myself as possible, unless I really can't.
If I feel that I need medical assistance, I will call the doctor as well.
Other than that I am free to call him any time, day or night.
We have agreed that this can go on for 2 or 3 weeks max. If I can't stay sober on my own by then, I must go to the doctor and do whatever they suggest.
This is truly a blessing to have this support and I am very grateful. Having my brother help me out takes away so much of the weight off my shoulders.
Well, today I'll drink. So this is day 0. But from now on I won't be able to anymore since I can't get booze anymore thanks to my brother's help. So I have no choice but to stay sober.
Day 1 tomorrow, I'll keep you updated.
However today was both a failure and a blessing.
I went to the store to get some groceries and bought booze as well. The reasoning was "Ah well, since I'm going to quit, this one last time won't matter". I can't remember how many times I've thought that over the past year, but it justifies my actions in my mind.
As I walked out of the store, off-course I realized what was going on and that I was fooling myself. So this time, instead of going straight home, I walked to my brother's house. He lives a 10 minute walk away from me. He knows about my problem but didn't know yet that I wanted to quit.
So I got to his place and explained everything. And I told him that I needed help. He said that he'd be there for me and we agreed on a plan.
In a way he's my sponsor even though he's never even touched a cigarette. Never had any issues with drugs, never used them. He does drink a little bit every once in a while, but it's never been problematic for him.
So this is what we agreed on:
I gave him my wallet and all my money. I have zero cash. Which is cool, because it means that I cannot buy my second round today, which means that I can drink 50% of what I usually would max.
For the next couple of weeks, whenever I need to buy something, we will go together and he will pay with my money. I will not, under any circumstance except for a real emergency get access to it myself.
I have to call him each day before noon. If I haven't called, he will call me and check up on me. And he'll insist that I do keep to our agreement. At no point am I allowed to turn off my phone.
After we called, I must come visit him and talk about how it's going. Unless I'm too sick, then he'll come visit me. And he know's when I'm bs'ing him.
At the end of the day I must send him an e-mail with my current status. If I don't he'll call me again.
If I don't respond at all, he'll come to my place. I've given him a spare key. He'll assess the situation and take action. If there is even the slightest hint of a need for medical attention, he'll call a doctor.
In general he'll keep a close look on my overall condition and if he thinks medical attention may even be remotely necessary, he will make me call the doctor myself. The point is that I need to do as much myself as possible, unless I really can't.
If I feel that I need medical assistance, I will call the doctor as well.
Other than that I am free to call him any time, day or night.
We have agreed that this can go on for 2 or 3 weeks max. If I can't stay sober on my own by then, I must go to the doctor and do whatever they suggest.
This is truly a blessing to have this support and I am very grateful. Having my brother help me out takes away so much of the weight off my shoulders.
Well, today I'll drink. So this is day 0. But from now on I won't be able to anymore since I can't get booze anymore thanks to my brother's help. So I have no choice but to stay sober.
Day 1 tomorrow, I'll keep you updated.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Athens, Georgia
Posts: 962
I had some old Goat's A$$ say at a meeting in my early days of attempting to get sober, "He'll NEVER Make It". That guy was right...for a long time. There was also a young woman at a meeting, way back when, that said she had enough white chips to tile a bathroom, but she kept coming back until the 'Miracle' happened.
Something that made a radical change in my quest for sobriety, was the Crash Course on the AVRT website. If you have not done it, please do.
I still go to a lot of AA meetings, but AVRT helped me recognize the genuine from the B/S, especially in myself.
Keep coming back, your life may depend on it...but at some point you MUST listen to the people here, and DO some of the things suggested. Addiction is a cunning foe, my friend.
Something that made a radical change in my quest for sobriety, was the Crash Course on the AVRT website. If you have not done it, please do.
I still go to a lot of AA meetings, but AVRT helped me recognize the genuine from the B/S, especially in myself.
Keep coming back, your life may depend on it...but at some point you MUST listen to the people here, and DO some of the things suggested. Addiction is a cunning foe, my friend.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: The Emerald City
Posts: 434
Glad to hear that your brother is helping you and that you're taking your sobriety with seriousness and caution. Keep us posted on your progress. This is a great place for support. Cheering you on!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 12
Day 1!
Usually around this time of day I would start drinking. Not anymore! Thanks to the arrangement with my brother it is impossible for me to get booze.
Physically I don't feel different yet, so no withdrawal yet. Also no cravings.
Mentally I feel spectacular! It feels like such a weight off my shoulders. All I can think about is how great my life will be from now on.
I'm not expecting anything, to avoid self-fulfilling prophecies. I'll see what happens.
One interesting thing is... I'm sitting here thinking "So, what should I go do now?" I used to spend my time drinking, now that time is free and I need to find new things to do. I think I'll start by going through the AVRT Crash Course.
But man, the relief of having it behind me is incredible.
Usually around this time of day I would start drinking. Not anymore! Thanks to the arrangement with my brother it is impossible for me to get booze.
Physically I don't feel different yet, so no withdrawal yet. Also no cravings.
Mentally I feel spectacular! It feels like such a weight off my shoulders. All I can think about is how great my life will be from now on.
I'm not expecting anything, to avoid self-fulfilling prophecies. I'll see what happens.
One interesting thing is... I'm sitting here thinking "So, what should I go do now?" I used to spend my time drinking, now that time is free and I need to find new things to do. I think I'll start by going through the AVRT Crash Course.
But man, the relief of having it behind me is incredible.
Not The Way way, Just the way
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: US
Posts: 1,413
Originally Posted by goingtobesober 
...
I'm not expecting anything, to avoid self-fulfilling prophecies. I'll see what happens.
...
I think I'll start by going through the AVRT Crash Course.
But man, the relief of having it behind me is incredible.
I'm not expecting anything, to avoid self-fulfilling prophecies. I'll see what happens.
...
I think I'll start by going through the AVRT Crash Course.
But man, the relief of having it behind me is incredible.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 12
Thanks to all those who responded.
It's a bit later on day 1. At this point I definitely would have been drunk. My body is reacting to the lack of alcohol, but I can't say it's unpleasant. It feels like a physical relief along with the mental one. Like, my body for the first time in a long time doesn't need to work hard to work the poison out of my body.
I took some melatonin to help with sleep. In response to that I find it hard so concentrate since I'm feeling sleepy. So I can't concentrate on the AVRT course right now, that will be something for tomorrow.
But so far I feel ok. I'll see what happens next.
It's a bit later on day 1. At this point I definitely would have been drunk. My body is reacting to the lack of alcohol, but I can't say it's unpleasant. It feels like a physical relief along with the mental one. Like, my body for the first time in a long time doesn't need to work hard to work the poison out of my body.
I took some melatonin to help with sleep. In response to that I find it hard so concentrate since I'm feeling sleepy. So I can't concentrate on the AVRT course right now, that will be something for tomorrow.
But so far I feel ok. I'll see what happens next.
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