She really made me drink!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: London
Posts: 50
She really made me drink!
Shelved sobriety today again. How do people cope with ****** up vicious people?
I'm able to get it back, but the one thing that made me drink, made me drink again, Was the ability of a sad old person to get under my skin. The old person living in a small top floor flat. But it soon became clear she hated us/me (notes thru door). After that it was enough harassment for us to call the police. .TWICE.
I would like to share online stories.
I had about 3 weeks before I posted. I have about 2 weeks after that. I don't see myself as a daytime drinker again, but I DID start drinking in the day today because my child was getting back at 1pm. Hubby was due back at 5pm.
I'm able to get it back, but the one thing that made me drink, made me drink again, Was the ability of a sad old person to get under my skin. The old person living in a small top floor flat. But it soon became clear she hated us/me (notes thru door). After that it was enough harassment for us to call the police. .TWICE.
I would like to share online stories.
I had about 3 weeks before I posted. I have about 2 weeks after that. I don't see myself as a daytime drinker again, but I DID start drinking in the day today because my child was getting back at 1pm. Hubby was due back at 5pm.
Last edited by Dee74; 04-03-2013 at 05:35 AM. Reason: details removed by request
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: The South Pacific
Posts: 306
Most likely not what you wanted to hear, but I agree with SoberKnitter.
I drink.
Sh%^ty people may act that way toward me, and my immediate reaction is to drink.
But I'm not going to today.
I'm sorry you're having a rough day.
I drink.
Sh%^ty people may act that way toward me, and my immediate reaction is to drink.
But I'm not going to today.
I'm sorry you're having a rough day.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 141
Sorry you're having a rough day. I agree with others. It's not about the actions of others, it's about our RE-actions. You drank. Ok.
I just got back from a meeting and someone said we can start our day over at any point. We don't need to start again tomorrow.
Restart your day. Try to see the choice points that come just before your (re)actions.
You can do this!
I just got back from a meeting and someone said we can start our day over at any point. We don't need to start again tomorrow.
Restart your day. Try to see the choice points that come just before your (re)actions.
You can do this!
Every Mother's Worst Nightmare
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Deep in the heart of LaLa land
Posts: 688
Thread titles like that are only going to get you tough love around here, Snowie.
We've all got excuses, some on this board with really tragic, life-threatening excuses.
The best thing you can do to **** off noisy neighbours: don't pick up. You'll feel so good in yourself that you didn't let them get to you.
We've all got excuses, some on this board with really tragic, life-threatening excuses.
The best thing you can do to **** off noisy neighbours: don't pick up. You'll feel so good in yourself that you didn't let them get to you.
Sobriety is Traditional
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Orcas Island, Washington
Posts: 9,055
She really made me drink!
Around here, we take allegations like this seriously. So I, as many others, have this picture of a woman forcing your mouth open and pouring alcohol down your throat.
For me, the only thing that could "make" me consume alcohol is an involuntary IV. And even if that's not totally true, the more times I type it here the more likely that it will be true.
For me, the only thing that could "make" me consume alcohol is an involuntary IV. And even if that's not totally true, the more times I type it here the more likely that it will be true.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 26
Before I quit I went through a list of things that could possibly drive me to drinking again (not *make* me drink). The worst case scenarios... and I came up with coping strategies for those incredibly bad things other than drinking just to make sure I was up to it...
Two of them already happened in the past 10 days of abstinence and turned out much less of a disaster than I imagined to begin with and most of all dit not "make" me drink.
Not to sound patronising... Try to come up with coping strategies BEFORE. It is no guarantee but it will helpt to be prepared and have a mental arsenal.
Besides, you will feel so much stronger when you deal with problems, especially other people, without drinking. It truly builds trust in your own strength and perseverance when they do not hold such power over you, destructive power.
Two of them already happened in the past 10 days of abstinence and turned out much less of a disaster than I imagined to begin with and most of all dit not "make" me drink.
Not to sound patronising... Try to come up with coping strategies BEFORE. It is no guarantee but it will helpt to be prepared and have a mental arsenal.
Besides, you will feel so much stronger when you deal with problems, especially other people, without drinking. It truly builds trust in your own strength and perseverance when they do not hold such power over you, destructive power.
Keeping it simple!
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Surrey, BC
Posts: 3,282
Originally Posted by Snowie71 
I'm able to get it back, but the one thing that made me drink, made me drink again, Was the ability of a sad old person to get under my skin.
God knows I had lots of excuses that "made" me drink. From a crappy customer to PMS. It was never my fault I drank.
Once I realized that the problem was me and that I was the one that "made" myself drink, things became a lot clearer. You can do this, it is a matter of changing your thinking.
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,097
Originally Posted by LadyinBC
You kill them with kindness. Your addicted part of your brain is using this as an excuse to drink. No one "makes" us drink. We choose to. We choose to cope with life by drinking.
God knows I had lots of excuses that "made" me drink. From a crappy customer to PMS. It was never my fault I drank.
Once I realized that the problem was me and that I was the one that "made" myself drink, things became a lot clearer. You can do this, it is a matter of changing your thinking.
God knows I had lots of excuses that "made" me drink. From a crappy customer to PMS. It was never my fault I drank.
Once I realized that the problem was me and that I was the one that "made" myself drink, things became a lot clearer. You can do this, it is a matter of changing your thinking.
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
Originally Posted by KeyHeart
You took what was one problem and now you're turned it into at LEAST two problems! Alcohol math! It's never on your side!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 280
This might not be helpful... but I'm still learning to be assertive (and enjoying it). I realize how often people walked all over me, and I'd let them, because it was a very handy excuse to drink... Next time the lady is mean/rude to you, be honest with her, tell her - I used to drink to cope with having you as a neighbor, I'm not going to do that anymore, I want to insure that I will out live you, so at your funeral I can tell your friends and family how aweful of a person you were . . . that is, if any of your friends and family show up.
And then never speak to her again, don't read her notes, ignore her existance.... that is how I deal with ****ed up people.
And then never speak to her again, don't read her notes, ignore her existance.... that is how I deal with ****ed up people.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,313
Hi Snowie - welcome 
Others have said it... maybe a little more forcefully than I would...but yeah this is your problem to fix.
This woman won't change. Fair or not, it falls to you to do the changing, and to take the responsibility for your own drinking.
Drinking solves nothing.
If that was my neighbour, I'd be ignoring her totally, getting a restraining order, or moving.
D
Others have said it... maybe a little more forcefully than I would...but yeah this is your problem to fix.
This woman won't change. Fair or not, it falls to you to do the changing, and to take the responsibility for your own drinking.
Drinking solves nothing.
If that was my neighbour, I'd be ignoring her totally, getting a restraining order, or moving.
D
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,507
Welcome Snowie.
We're glad you're here, & want to help you to keep from falling back on alcohol when you're upset. You said you can 'get it back' - your sobriety - and I'm sure you will. Please talk about what's bothering you here - before you take that drink. It'll help relieve the anxiety you're feeling. I used it to mask my feelings for years, and it never helped resolve my troubles - just kept me in a numb & foggy state where I was incapable of accomplishing anything. I hope you're ready to give this another try.
We're glad you're here, & want to help you to keep from falling back on alcohol when you're upset. You said you can 'get it back' - your sobriety - and I'm sure you will. Please talk about what's bothering you here - before you take that drink. It'll help relieve the anxiety you're feeling. I used it to mask my feelings for years, and it never helped resolve my troubles - just kept me in a numb & foggy state where I was incapable of accomplishing anything. I hope you're ready to give this another try.
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