Life Beyond Food and Drinks ?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 2
Life Beyond Food and Drinks ?
Dear friends, a new addict here, a less popular one perhaps or as common as everyone, not good with labels and definitions either
I am 45 and raised in a Mediterranean society where food&drinks is a unique lifestyle, a nation of tavern drunks I guess. Since then, my culinary curiosities have made me an amateur cook and international food&drink addict
I cannot drink without good food and I don't enjoy good food without drinking.
I am now reaching the point of alcohol causing me problems. I have become more aggressive to little nuisances (like tailgaters, rude people, neighbors) to the point of picking up fights even in the street. Recently I also had my first DUI.
Don't know how to approach my problem really yet...moderation doesn't seem to work for me neither for food nor for drinks. I am addicted to a 24 ounce rare rib eye stake as much as I am to a bottle of expensive wine. Addicted to greek meze (tapas) to the point of refusing them without ouzo and refusing ouzo without the tapas. I just cannot eat sushi without sake or drink sake straight.
I thought I could control both but I can't. I am now overweight and an alcoholic. I am about to get into recovery but the docs say there is no turning back, no hope of moderation...it's all or nothing
The thought of leaving all my cooking and culinary quests behind makes me so depressed. At the same time I need to deal with shaking off 2 pleasures, not just one, which in my opinion makes it harder.
As I am approaching rehab, I will try to make this thread more of a personal diary
Any friends wishing to share similar experiences or just say good luck, please join me in my search for balance whatever that may be
God Bless You all
I am 45 and raised in a Mediterranean society where food&drinks is a unique lifestyle, a nation of tavern drunks I guess. Since then, my culinary curiosities have made me an amateur cook and international food&drink addict
I cannot drink without good food and I don't enjoy good food without drinking.
I am now reaching the point of alcohol causing me problems. I have become more aggressive to little nuisances (like tailgaters, rude people, neighbors) to the point of picking up fights even in the street. Recently I also had my first DUI.
Don't know how to approach my problem really yet...moderation doesn't seem to work for me neither for food nor for drinks. I am addicted to a 24 ounce rare rib eye stake as much as I am to a bottle of expensive wine. Addicted to greek meze (tapas) to the point of refusing them without ouzo and refusing ouzo without the tapas. I just cannot eat sushi without sake or drink sake straight.
I thought I could control both but I can't. I am now overweight and an alcoholic. I am about to get into recovery but the docs say there is no turning back, no hope of moderation...it's all or nothing
The thought of leaving all my cooking and culinary quests behind makes me so depressed. At the same time I need to deal with shaking off 2 pleasures, not just one, which in my opinion makes it harder.
As I am approaching rehab, I will try to make this thread more of a personal diary
Any friends wishing to share similar experiences or just say good luck, please join me in my search for balance whatever that may be
God Bless You all
Sobriety is Traditional
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Orcas Island, Washington
Posts: 9,066
I hope you appreciate this story. I go to AA meetings, and hear others talk about the "miracle" of sobriety. Like many things at AA, at first this sounded strange to me, but over time I have come to believe that I am indeed very fortunate to be on a path to sustained sobriety. This story tells how much I appreciate my rehab program:
There is a story about men who have lost their legs--and it says they never grow new ones. The moral is that alcoholics will never be non-alcoholics.
Well, my Dad had only one leg, and although he never grew a new one he always had an artificial leg. But the Veteran's Administration is not sufficiently funded, so up to the end of the 20th century (when he died) his legs were made of wood, attached with leather straps and had an inflexible ankle. Oscar Pistorius's little toe cost more than all the legs dad ever had.
Dad lost his leg fighting for freedom, including the right to drink. He also fought for social and environmental justice, and he would be happy to know that I was able to find help for my alcoholism when I needed it. The sobriety given to me by a minimally-funded detox center, and maintained by a non-profit organization, is all free. I am not going to squander the miracle of sobriety I have been given, and I will never drink again.
Thanks, DAD!
There is a story about men who have lost their legs--and it says they never grow new ones. The moral is that alcoholics will never be non-alcoholics.
Well, my Dad had only one leg, and although he never grew a new one he always had an artificial leg. But the Veteran's Administration is not sufficiently funded, so up to the end of the 20th century (when he died) his legs were made of wood, attached with leather straps and had an inflexible ankle. Oscar Pistorius's little toe cost more than all the legs dad ever had.
Dad lost his leg fighting for freedom, including the right to drink. He also fought for social and environmental justice, and he would be happy to know that I was able to find help for my alcoholism when I needed it. The sobriety given to me by a minimally-funded detox center, and maintained by a non-profit organization, is all free. I am not going to squander the miracle of sobriety I have been given, and I will never drink again.
Thanks, DAD!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 987
Oh Tavernlord, do I ever hear what you're saying! For me, food and drink have always, always gone hand-in-hand. I couldn't (and still have a hard time doing so) imagine one without the other. I am American but my mother is from Italy and I was also raised the same "Mediterranean" way with food and drink that you describe.
But, like you, my drinking became out of hand and I had to quit. I am six weeks sober now and I have not yet gone out to dinner at one of my favorite restaurants or accepted an invitation to a friend's house for a meal because the drinking/eating culture is so ingrained with me. I am slowly learning how to learn to love food again without the booze but it is a struggle. I secretly disdain some of my relatives who seem to be able to live long and healthy lives and still consume drink with food regularly. I kept asking for many years, "What the hell is wrong with my genetics? Why can't I do that too and not have a problem?" But I do...and that seems to be that
There are several chefs on here that have posted some rather useful tips/techniques they have used for learning how to enjoy food without alcohol and break some of the ingrained association.
Glad you're going to rehab and even more glad you posted. Totally feel you on that one so please know you're not alone. And please keep posting.
All the best to you on your journey towards recovery!
But, like you, my drinking became out of hand and I had to quit. I am six weeks sober now and I have not yet gone out to dinner at one of my favorite restaurants or accepted an invitation to a friend's house for a meal because the drinking/eating culture is so ingrained with me. I am slowly learning how to learn to love food again without the booze but it is a struggle. I secretly disdain some of my relatives who seem to be able to live long and healthy lives and still consume drink with food regularly. I kept asking for many years, "What the hell is wrong with my genetics? Why can't I do that too and not have a problem?" But I do...and that seems to be that
There are several chefs on here that have posted some rather useful tips/techniques they have used for learning how to enjoy food without alcohol and break some of the ingrained association.
Glad you're going to rehab and even more glad you posted. Totally feel you on that one so please know you're not alone. And please keep posting.
All the best to you on your journey towards recovery!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
Welcome to SR Tavernlord 
I felt the same way. In fact it was my number one excuse for carrying on drinking for some time, I couldn't possibly enjoy Italian food without wine or curry without beer... When I quit drinking I ate really boring food because those associations were so strong I couldn't stay sober and eat. So I ate tinned soup and stews. Now I can eat anything sober (Indian and Chinese food were my real tests) and it doesn't bother me. I am sure you will find the same in time x
Originally Posted by Tavernlord 
I cannot drink without good food and I don't enjoy good food without drinking.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,503
I agree that I think you will gradually get used to eating your favorite foods without alcohol being involved. Maybe you can shift your cooking skills a bit and work on finding some healthy recipes to try out.
Please let us know how you're doing when you get to rehab.
Please let us know how you're doing when you get to rehab.
voices ca**y
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: St. Paul Minnesota
Posts: 4,359
Food can be an addiction also, but the truth is most all of us pair pleasures with alcohol. I pair it with relaxing on the deck or taking a soaking in the tub with a nice bottle of wine. I am sure they have ways of helping you with this in rehab because learning to enjoy life without it is something we all deal with. Besides alcohol is so full of calories and messes up the metabolism process is all you have to do is quit drinking and you will lose weight.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: South East England
Posts: 8,009
Welcome to SR
I agree with others who have said it IS possible to break those associations you have in your mind between food and alcohol.
Food wasn't the issue for me personally (I barely ate at all when I was drinking), but I didn't think I would EVER break the need to drink on a Friday! I know it sounds silly but Friday=alcohol. I couldn't see any way in the world I could possibly break that association. But I did. Over time, I filled my Friday with other things until it was gone. Now I don't think about it at all.
Good luck with rehab.
Good to have you here x
I agree with others who have said it IS possible to break those associations you have in your mind between food and alcohol.
Food wasn't the issue for me personally (I barely ate at all when I was drinking), but I didn't think I would EVER break the need to drink on a Friday! I know it sounds silly but Friday=alcohol. I couldn't see any way in the world I could possibly break that association. But I did. Over time, I filled my Friday with other things until it was gone. Now I don't think about it at all.
Good luck with rehab.
Good to have you here x
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,643
I too love to cook and wine went well with both cooking and dining. Yesterday, I made a big pan of moussaka but skipped adding the usual red wine, substituting a few splashes of rice wine vinegar instead. You know what? It turned out fantastic! Still learning my way around the kitchen sober, but I know it can be done!
You will find much support and encouragement here, maybe even a few tips on cooking without alcohol...lol!
You will find much support and encouragement here, maybe even a few tips on cooking without alcohol...lol!
Re-Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Colorado Springs, Colorado
Posts: 7,583
I had two addictions too, smoking three packs a day and drinking more than 30 units of alcohol a day. Fortunately I managed to overcome them both. Then I became an overeater and gained weight. Unfortunately, unlike alcohol or smokes, I can't quit eating completely. So now I have to deal with moderation. I can do this, you can too. I also loved fine alcoholic concoctions with fine haute cuisine. I did not have trouble ditching the drink with fine foods. I still drink sparkling drinks and fine non alcoholic concoctions with my meals. You can too.
I may not ever be a non alcoholic, but I am a non drinker of anything alcoholic for life.
Literally for life. I had to choose to continue to commit slow suicide, or choose life.
Thus I became a non-drinker, for life!
I am free, so are most of us here, or working on it. Thanks for joining us.
I may not ever be a non alcoholic, but I am a non drinker of anything alcoholic for life.
Literally for life. I had to choose to continue to commit slow suicide, or choose life.
Thus I became a non-drinker, for life!
I am free, so are most of us here, or working on it. Thanks for joining us.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 2
Friends, your support and answers are overwhelming
what can I say, never had a taste for whiskey or any non food related booze, never done drugs, doesn't smoke. Used to laugh at my drunk classmates in college, used to be sad at all the destroyed by booze souls, never thought I would get where I am today, my wife has left me for 4 days now, I don't drive any more I only walk, I put on more than 30 lb over a year, its like the bill of over 20 years became due overnight...
Managed to go to Church today...so many people carrying crosses
what can I say, never had a taste for whiskey or any non food related booze, never done drugs, doesn't smoke. Used to laugh at my drunk classmates in college, used to be sad at all the destroyed by booze souls, never thought I would get where I am today, my wife has left me for 4 days now, I don't drive any more I only walk, I put on more than 30 lb over a year, its like the bill of over 20 years became due overnight...
Managed to go to Church today...so many people carrying crosses
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,436
I still enjoy good food and good company - I think the food tastes even better without alcohol polluting my palate, and I'm better company for not being a drunken mess
welcome to SR TavernLord
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welcome to SR TavernLord
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