Quagmires
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Tucson Arizona
Posts: 28
Quagmires
Hi everyone,
First off,
I am new here so I would just like to say hello
and give a big shout out to all of you who have
saved my sanity over the last 2 weeks
whether you realize it or not!-
My husband is an alcoholic
and has been for 26 years!
Like many of you,
I thought that our love
was so powerful that it could overcome anything!
Not so!-
But now I am in a quagmire
because not only do we have a
3 year old daughter together but now I am
six months pregnant!
I have been living with him on and off for about 4 years
and now I am at my mothers because the drinking and
everything else became too much.
I have to say that sometimes I wish my mother would just throw me out
so that I would have to deal with the mess that I rightfully created.
And even tho' I'm grateful for everything she is giving me
I know that I should be responsible for my kids and my own family.
Sometimes I feel like sitting in an ivory tower isn't good enough.
I realize that it is not my responsibility to take on his drinking,
and that I can't change him,
but it is breaking my heart that we are not "going for it".
I guess love is a two way street and I've done all that I can do.
What am I supposed to do?
First off,
I am new here so I would just like to say hello
and give a big shout out to all of you who have
saved my sanity over the last 2 weeks
whether you realize it or not!-
My husband is an alcoholic
and has been for 26 years!
Like many of you,
I thought that our love
was so powerful that it could overcome anything!
Not so!-
But now I am in a quagmire
because not only do we have a
3 year old daughter together but now I am
six months pregnant!
I have been living with him on and off for about 4 years
and now I am at my mothers because the drinking and
everything else became too much.
I have to say that sometimes I wish my mother would just throw me out
so that I would have to deal with the mess that I rightfully created.
And even tho' I'm grateful for everything she is giving me
I know that I should be responsible for my kids and my own family.
Sometimes I feel like sitting in an ivory tower isn't good enough.
I realize that it is not my responsibility to take on his drinking,
and that I can't change him,
but it is breaking my heart that we are not "going for it".
I guess love is a two way street and I've done all that I can do.
What am I supposed to do?
Member
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
Hey ZionLion,
Welcome, I'm glad you joined us.
Stay in your safe place for a while, you deserve it. A time will come when you figure out how to go onto the next thing. I think sometimes we need a place that is quiet to figure out what our next step will be.
You may have a mess to deal with, but you didn't make that mess all by yourself.
Love is supposed to be a two-way street. Unfortunately, that is not always the case. I know of this, I have walked many a one-way street myself.
Be gentle with yourself and give yourself some time.
And stick around, there are a lot of people here who understand what you are going through and will offer you encouragement, support and hugs when you need them.
Peace,
Gabe
Welcome, I'm glad you joined us.
Stay in your safe place for a while, you deserve it. A time will come when you figure out how to go onto the next thing. I think sometimes we need a place that is quiet to figure out what our next step will be.
You may have a mess to deal with, but you didn't make that mess all by yourself.
Love is supposed to be a two-way street. Unfortunately, that is not always the case. I know of this, I have walked many a one-way street myself.
Be gentle with yourself and give yourself some time.
And stick around, there are a lot of people here who understand what you are going through and will offer you encouragement, support and hugs when you need them.
Peace,
Gabe
Member
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Ayer's Cliff, Quebec
Posts: 803
Re: Quagmires
Hi,
Welcome and listen to Gabe. You didn't get there all by yourself. Take advantage of what your mother is offering and you'll be able to figure out what to do next. Take care of you.
Ngaire
Welcome and listen to Gabe. You didn't get there all by yourself. Take advantage of what your mother is offering and you'll be able to figure out what to do next. Take care of you.
Ngaire
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