Redheadsusie

Some days are super great - some days are tougher. I am seeing a therapist - started Tai Chi - doing meditations- spending time with family and my sons and trying to keep the negativity out of my head. I had not spoken to AH in weeks but he called Friday about the house etc. - started out ok and then the venom started - the first nasty word- I hung up- blocked his number - e mailed and said to stay away from me - I will file a restraining order if I have to and will only communicate by e mail about financial stuff.

He wants me to be broke and get nothing - I will figure it out- my sanity and my peace of mind and health is more important- I can rebuild - when a negative thought comes in my head I replace it with a counter thought. The things he said about me are just quacking- I practive self affirmations and self love.

I am so grateful for SR and the strength you have given me and the wisdom I have learned from you~ I hope one day to be healthy enough to help others.
With love -

LoveMeNow

You just did. Thank you!!

honeypig

Readheadsusie, it sounds like you are doing just GREAT! Keep taking care of yourself as you have been. You are on the path to a better life; he is NOT.

My best wishes and hopes to you!

ShootingStar1

He wants me to be broke and get nothing - I will figure it out- my sanity and my peace of mind and health is more important- I can rebuild

Redheadsusie, what "he" wants isn't going to be the operative thing in a divorce, if that's where you're going. A good tough lawyer will make sure of that for you, and they can do all the interface with his lawyer.

ShootingStar1

Rosiepetal

You are doing fantastic & there is a bright future ahead of you.
Thank you for sharing.

redatlanta

Thanks for letting us know how you are - I have been thinking about you.

brokenrose

Dear Redheadsusie, you have already helped others....you were very kind to me when I was hurting so much over axbf and daddy's leukemia....just want to say thank-you to you. I hope things get better and better for you, you deserve it.

Redheadsusie

It is amazing in this journey of getting out of an abusive alcoholic relationship- how damaged one is - and how one day to the next can be like night and day. Today I feel little hope. I am trying the positive affirmations - not working- trying to remember my blessings - not working- trying to smile- can't - just want to cry and say Why Me? I know it will do nothing believe me - I am pissed at the world and it is nobody's fault but mine for giving 13 years to such a ********. I have aged 20 years - have no money- no savings - no self worth and feel hopeless. Today I actually wished death outloud on him and that is not right - I am not that type of person ..or maybe I am. **** this!

honeypig

Readheadsusie, I do not have a fraction of the issues w/my A as you do w/yours, and I am still familiar w/the roller coaster of "Yes, I can do this, I'll be fine" and "No, I just can't handle it, wtf, I am just done...."

Cold comfort as it might be, all things do pass, both good and bad. Hang in and try to turn your burdens over to whatever you perceive as your higher power.

Wishing you calm and strength.

stella27

Mine was just like that, Susie. I promise you, there are brighter days ahead. I am not rich, but I have a job, my children are healthy, happy, engaged in activities and we have a great family life.

You are going to get here too.