NeverDrink

Hey everybody,

As I am relatively new to these forums, I don't know if this topic has been touched upon, but I would love to know the answer. Basically my question is this: how many of you have had success in quitting on your own and using these forums, instead of going to meetings? I have tried to go to AA meetings a few times, but I didn't enjoy them and I have decided not to go back. I have quit before, on a couple of different occasions for about a month at a time, and using these forums was a great way for me to sort of decompress and gain back some willpower. I'm wondering how many other people are in the same situation?

Fandy

many of the posters do not use AA.

i am 22 months with SR (and gratitude threads especially) as my mainstay of support. I feel it is important to connect here and there is a wealth of knowledge and online friendship/support.

however you stay sober is your recovery and inner peace? (does that sound hokey)?

welcome and congrats on your decision, you can do this.

Mizzuno

Hello. Just from my personal experience, this forum helped me for a few months without AA or anything else. I started to get restless, the moderator suggested that i seek out more support. I didnt. I am back now after a drastic situation that will take time to recover from. Personally, I think that getting all the help that you can is beneficial. It doesnt have to be AA. Having someone Face to Face is invaluable for me. That is just me though. Im sure that others have their own set of tools to share.

Veritas1

I utilize SR in addition to following the AA program rather than instead of.

I am so sick I need both.

My current experience is that I wake up and follow the outline in the book Alcoholics Anonymous on pages 86-88.

After I have read upon awakening, and have said my prayers, I log on to SR, and read the daily meditations such as Twenty Four Hours A Day found on the alcoholism twelve step forum.

The program of AA teaches me how to live, and I get to come to SR as a result of that, and the power that I have found that is solving my problem through the 12 steps of AA.

There are many people here at SR, and I consider it to be a home group. I am accountable here. There is experience, strength and hope here among the members.

I learn from them, and SR has been in my life now for years.

I never miss a day.

My life has changed as a result of AA and SR, and I am grateful.

Sally3127

I was an isolated drinker so I find that going to meetings makes me get out of the house and have some purpose. I feel left to my own devices and just the computer I would drink again. Maybe down the road I can cut back on meerings and use this forum more frequently but right now AA meetings are where I need to be.

OneLessLonely

I am almost 10 months sober with SR alone. I am starting counseling as I have some stuff to work through and need to learn new ways of coping. But I've never 100% ruled out AA. Because I know it does help a lot of people. I think it's important that whatever you choose to do, you go at it full steam though. And if it doesn't work, be ready to add more.

ScottFromWI

All depends on what level of support you want/need, and what type system works best. AA/AVRT/SMART, etc..are all good in their own way. I have personally just used the support of my family and SR throughout my recovery so far and it seems to be going well. Not to say i won't try something else someday, it's important to keep an open mind no matter what road you travel.

DarkDays

14 months sober Just with Sr and a reading a few books/blogs etc. ThinK I would have found it all a bit easier if I had some real life interaction with people who are getting sober or who have been sober a while , everyone's mind works in different ways, do whats best.

avocado

I'm about 90 days sober and I've only attended one AA meeting in that time, and that's because a friend was going so I tagged along for something to do on a Friday night. I post or read here to remind myself that I don't want to slip back into drinking. I personally don't like a lot of what AA is about, so I have no desire or intention to join. The theoretical underpinnings of AA completely contradict my own views of human nature and reality, so it's just not my thing. My method is to simply not drink and instead of focusing on my 'sobriety' i am focusing on a broader self-improvement program that necessitates me staying sober to focus on what I'm doing.

least

I've stayed sober over three years now with the help of this forum and my counselor.

Veritas1

I hope this doesn't turn into an AA versus non AA debate.

Some people need AA which leads us to God, and some people can quit on their own willpower.

I see people quit on their own, but that was never my experience.

Perhaps it has to do with how far the disease has progressed...to the extent whether or not you have lost the power to choose whether you will drink or not.

MeSoSober

Same here. Well, actually I did get some enjoyment from some of the meetings, but mostly they were uncomfortable, particularly when people were being called on to speak.I've only ever attended a total of about eight to ten meetings, but REALLY didn't want to talk, and the more meetings I attended, the more self-conscious I became about being identified as "that chick who comes but never talks." I know you can always pass on speaking if called upon, but I was STILL nervous. I really wanted to attend not just anonymously, but invisibly! Obviously not possible.

I feel like this forum is perfect for me -- a place where I can share, interact and even develop relationships with people to whom I feel accountable, but without having to speak in front of a room of people. And this forum is here ALL THE TIME. I can come here over and over, throughout the day or night, to reinforce my commitment to sobriety through other members' successes and failures and encouragement. If I feel an urge I know I can come here and multiple people will probably be here to talk me through it.

I only have two weeks sober, but I feel like this forum is going to be a kind of sobriety lifeline for me. I'm not currently doing anything else to maintain sobriety other than reading and posting here and just generally trying to eat better, exercise, and take better care of myself.

Welcome to you!

Rennet

When I have returned to drinking I've found it's very easy to just not visit this forum and it just disappears out of sight out of mind. I think long term for myself I will want to speak to a professional about a plan to sustain sobriety once I can get there on my own for a month or more.

AA has never appealed to me.. maybe I'll try it one day but I think I work much better hearing things on a very mechanical level from a doctor or counselor ('Your body is doing this because xyz, mind because of abc')

FinallyFinished

I have never been to a meeting. I just come here every day. I think that if you want it bad enough, anything will work.

dublingal

.I've only ever attended a total of about eight to ten meetings, but REALLY didn't want to talk, and the more meetings I attended, the more self-conscious I became about being identified as "that chick who comes but never talks." I know you can always pass on speaking if called upon, but I was STILL nervous. I really wanted to attend not just anonymously, but invisibly! Obviously not possible.

I felt like that too at AA meetings. I attended lots of meeting over the years, but was never comfortable speaking about my drinking, recovery or deepest feelings in front of strangers. I used to end up spouting platitudes, and saying the accepted things in order to fit in. I found much of what went on in AA helpful, but the pressure to speak and the lack of anonymity in a small community did not work for me.

I'm not knocking AA as it has saved many many lives but I'm not sure its for me.

dublingal

Quote: "I've only ever attended a total of about eight to ten meetings, but REALLY didn't want to talk, and the more meetings I attended, the more self-conscious I became about being identified as "that chick who comes but never talks." I know you can always pass on speaking if called upon, but I was STILL nervous. I really wanted to attend not just anonymously, but invisibly! Obviously not possible."

I felt like that too at AA meetings. I attended lots of meeting over the years, but was never comfortable speaking about my drinking, recovery or deepest feelings in front of strangers. I used to end up spouting platitudes, and saying the accepted things in order to fit in. I found much of what went on in AA helpful, but the pressure to speak and the lack of anonymity in a small community did not work for me.

I'm not knocking AA as it has saved many many lives but I'm not sure its for me.

escapist

I just hung out here. I still have not gone to AA. This is my third time quitting and I am older. AA worked for me about 20 years ago. I stayed sober for 10 years. My drinking got worse each time I went back to it. This last time I never would have made it to a meeting. I was very sick. Just when I needed it I found this place. Got sober in my bathrobe right here on my laptop. I am very grateful to be where I am.

doggonecarl

Many succeed with just SR. Many who only want to use online support fail because they close themselves off to any other options.

Be willing to do whatever it takes to get and stay sober and your odds for success improve.

But if you are going to use SR, use it. Every day!

bumble

I was pondering this, too, NeverDrink. I am an introvert, so the mere thought of speaking, never mind speaking about myself/my feelings (which I don't do, even with close friends), makes me break out in a cold sweat! For that reason, I've found it easier to open up here - I get anonymity AND invisibility

That being said, I think Sally had a good point too - I isolated when I drank, so meetings might be good for me. And, while I haven't yet tested this theory, I think opening up here, and seeing how common a problem this is, might just make it easier to open up and ask for help face-to-face somewhere. We shall see!

Thanks for the thread!

FBL

I'm nearly 4 years sober with SR and some face-to-face support from a few family members and friends. I have nothing against any program. Just my way of doing it and it's working for me