HappyDestiny3

As I learned from the rooms. Resentments are like drinking poison, and waiting for you to die.

Well today I refuse to let someone have that much power. I had the most resentment for me. I accepted that everything that happened bad in my life was of my doing. And I tried to kill myself ever so slowly by poisoning myself with drinking and drugging for decades. And now that I have made it as far as I have I will not let someone else control that part of my sobriety.

"Forgiveness is the key to action and freedom." Hannah Arendt

Resentments keep us in the past, a past that never be relived. Resentments keep a stranglehold on our mind. They keep us from appreciating the beauty of a moment. They step us from hearing the loving voices of friends. We forget that we have a mission: to fulfill.

Fortunately , we can shake this hold on us and myself, and my freedom comes when I decide to forgive whatever transgressions are made against me. This decision, with some practice, has become second nature.

Clearly the choice to resent no one is my opportunity to free my mind and heart for real activities. That my HP wants me to attend to. My purpose in life would go unfulfilled if I harbored resentments. Thankfully I have a program of recovery that works for me.

Holding resentments against others hurts me. Forgiveness can make me glad to be alive today..


Good love , HP3..

ReadyAtLast

great post,thank you

Louise82

Great post, HD3. For too long I've had many resentments and those resentments have hurt me and others. They have nearly killed me, not least because I drank on them.

Now that I'm sober, I will do whatever it takes to let these resentments go. I am learning to forgive others and myself. Not forgiving myself in the past has led to me resenting myself as well as others.

Just this morning I prayed that I would not negatively react to others' actions but just focus on obeying God.

shauninspain

I believe in the AA Big Book it says that resentments are the number 1 offender. I can well believe it. I have to try to find a safe and mature way with dealing with resentments.

I know in AA I was told to take daily inventory. I did this. But developed a resentment regarding the fact that I had to see the defects of character within myself, and list them! I still pick resentments up, but can feel myself doing it now. However, I do need to ´hand them over´to something during, or at the end of the day, or else they overwhealm me, and I can end up in deep deep self pity, and a drink seems a good option.

OneLessLonely

I have read a lot about resentments and agree totally that they are detrimental. What do you guys do about people in your life who constantly give you reasons to have resentment? People who do things that hurt you, that you feel like you are forgiving all the time? I try to forgive the things I feel hurt me, but then I feel like I'm just turning into a doormat. Any time I've tried to express this to these people, they get defensive and it turns into a fight upsetting me even more. When other people get defensive, I just feel wrong so I relent. But the feelings of hurt and resentment are still there. It's vicious cycle with nothing resolved.

HappyDestiny3

Boundaries are the big thing to keep these things happening to you.. You have to know that if those people are going to do things that hurt you, have to take a step back from them.. And sometimes this can be one of the hardest things to do. Being close friends, family ect..

So you remember you are not wrong by expressing your feelings. And if someone gets defensive then your job is done.. You cant make them see their part in it, you have to remove yourself from this situation.

If you have toxic people around you, its only a matter of time before they turn yourself on you..

HappyDestiny3

Good for you Louise82... Keep it up..