duderwit

Hi everybody,

This is my first post. I'm at the stage where I now think I have a problem with alcohol. I drink only once a week (usually), but whenever I do, I act really stupidly. I was thinking of all the problems I've had in the past year, and they're all related to alcohol. I haven't done anything terrible, but just unnecessary burdens.

I'm 28 years old and still pulling the same crap that I did in college/high school. I find that I usually drink out of sheer boredom, but always regret it the next day. And once I have one drink, it's impossible to stop till I either pass out or there's nothing left in the house.

Last night, my brother (roommate) left for vacation, and I ended up drinking a whole bottle of wine and several gins. I then e-mailed my boss and basically say F-You to him. Not my finest moment.

I teach online English classes, and was at the same company for over a year. Lately, I was getting bored with that company. REALLY bored. And I started planning my exit. I got another job lined up that actually pays more and is way more enjoyable, but that won't be starting till May.

I guess thanks to the booze, I felt "confident" enough to get rid of the old job, but I feel uneasy. I probably would have quit that job sometime soon anyways, but don't like knowing the reason was because of alcohol. I think I have enough money till I start my new job in May, but I'm wondering what people think. I need to seriously re-evaluate my drinking and get normal. Do you recommend taking a month off work or is it good to stay busy with work? I could really use a sabbatical. Or do you think I should look for a new job till the May job kicks in?

Any advice or words of inspiration would be great.

Thanks

RDBplus3

Yea, it sounds like you screwed the pooch. Wow..Ouch...But if you are open for it...quit drinking completely NOW> Let this be the hingepoint where you make that COMMITMENT to complete SOBRIETY. I am 58 years old..I have had TOO MANY experiences like yours...They get more painful and bring more and more DIRE consequences. It has now been 4 months since I finally made a REAL commitment to complete Sobriety. I have had 2 drinking episodes in that time, the recent was drinking at work...AGAIN....just yesterday. I am living in pure Hell because of the consequences. Do yourself a big favor and make a commitment to complete sobriety NOW. Then, when you make an ass of yourself, the stigma of alcohol is not there, and it is much easier to deal with the consequences, especially because you will not be saying to yourself...I can't believe I said that when I was DRUNK.

quitforme79

Everyone's journey is different when quitting drinking... I don't know if you plan to quit but for me, work kept me sane simply by filling my time.

FeelingGreat

Duder it sounds like you do have a problem with alcohol; they come in all shapes and sizes, and although you only drink once a week, you can't control those sessions, or your unacceptable behaviour during them. Are you ready to stop drinking for good? If that idea makes you instinctively resist, then that's another pointer to you having a potential addictive problem. And alcoholism is progressive.
I can't advise you on the job thing, but if you work in an area where a lot of people know each other, then please be careful about your reputation. If you can't, or decide not to work before the new job kicks in, how about some volunteer work?

Tamerua

You have a new job, that is good. The issue is not whether or not you should take a break.. You are taking a break. The true issue is the drinking, right? What are you going to do about that? I'm glad you're here!

Willowgrace326

Duderwit....you sound like me a few years ago! I quit my job during a bad/ still half drunk hangover! I've been at my current job for 4 years now If you can afford a sabbatical - take it. If not, keep coming here! Congrats on taking the first step

Odelle

Duderwit, did your boss respond to the email? Is there any way you can reconcile the damage? One thing you don’t want to do, if possible, is to burn bridges. You never know if you will need this employer for a future job reference. Monday….phone call from boss….what email, me? Seriously? No dude, it must have been a virus!

Natom

I'd say that if you use this time between work to start a foundation for you to quit drinking then it's gotta be a good thing. You've got a few months to focus on looking after yourself and beginning to find the solution to your problem. Don't waste it.

Natom.

Pondlady

Sure sounds like you do things while drunk, you wouldn't do while sober.....a problem.

If it were me, I'd call my boss on Monday and apologize. I'd spend the time between now and starting the new job on self improvement.......but that's just me

Grymt

Talk about boredom and lack of confidence with someone like a psychologist or read up on it, think about it and keep posting.

TryingHarder

I also think you should call the boss on Monday and apologize. Not to get the job back, but because I think it's the right thing to do.

It would be good if technology was banned to us when we are drunk. Lots and lots of relationships have died at the hands of texts, emails, and such.

Beyond that, I think you know that the kind of drinking you've been doing can come to no good. Best of luck to you as you figure out how you want to move forward in your life. And I really hope you decide that drinking just isn't worth it.

Anna

I did things while drinking that I wouldn't have done otherwise, and that's a great reason to stop drinking.

I would definitely apologize to your old boss. I found that I needed something fulfilling in my life, low-stress, when I began recovery and volunteer work did that for me. It saved me.

duderwit

Thanks for everyones advice and feedback. I took some melatonin last night, had a long sleep, and feel much more optimistic today. Luckily, there's no shortage of jobs I can get in my field. And as they say, with every door that closes, a new one opens (or something like that). I think it was a big wake up call for me to stop screwing around. So today, I'll focus on drinking this excellent coffee, relaxing, watch good movies, and clean my apartment.

shauninspain

Sounds exactly like the sort of things I do when drunk. Though I generally try to throw things around the room and kick down doors as well, just for good measure.

I know many years ago someone asked me if I ALWAYS got into trouble when I drank. Confidently I say no, not at all. Then he said 'Have you always been drunk when you have gotten into trouble'. There was no denying it, I had.

Give it all you have, and then some to stay sober. You'll save yourself a whole lot of pain and misery.