shinebright7

This morning was the first time I went to an Al Anon meeting and didn't cry or complain about my husband and all the drama in my life.

(I"ve been to like 18 meetings in 3 weeks.)

Instead what happened was that we were working on Step 3...

And what stood out to me about the first three steps (especially) was that NONE of them were about my husband.

LOL

They had nothing to do with him AT ALL!

And just taking that in felt SO GOOD.

So during my share, I didn't talk about my husband!

I didn't talk about my drama!

I talked about how excited I was to get working these steps more carefully and how important I realize it is for me to be working my own program.

I was smiling and felt energized and was really getting the importance of paying attention to ME ME ME ME ME.

Today the quote at the bottom of the Courage to Change reading was:

"...Detachment is not caring less, it's caring more for my own serenity." From In All Our Affairs.

Wow, that was just what I needed to read.

Then I went back into the main meeting after we had broken into our smaller groups and we closed the meeting.

I approached the woman who did the lead and talked to her about possibly being my sponsor.

This was my committment to myself this week -- that I would find a sponsor, even a temporary one, so that I could get started more seriously with my program and working the steps.

She said that she DOES sponsor people, gave me her card and told me to write her. So as soon as I got home I did, and we're likely going to meet by Friday to see if we'll be a good fit.

I'm stoked about that!

The focus is on me. Detachment is a loving thing to do for me and my own serenity. Feeling grateful.

julez

Theres something about Al Anon that reminds me of Coda meetings, which are hard to find. I wonder if they can be interchanged?

blueholly

I'm excited for you shine! I wish I could get one to keep me motivated.... As we talked on my other post, I fell off of step 3 and it's been hard to get my excitement going again today. Thanks!!

shinebright7

I don't have any experience with Coda meetings, but certainly a lot of us in Al Anon are working with codependency issues. Why not give it a try if there's a meeting near you?

shinebright7

What's stopping you from getting a sponsor, BlueHolly? Have you been to some meetings and gotten some phone lists?

For a while I hesitated because I was nervous about not finding "the right one" - but a friend said just ask for a temporary one even to get started. Then you can see how it goes.

My Higher Power provided. This morning I decided to go to a meeting I'd never been to before because i wanted to keep meeting more people who could be potential sponsors...and there she was!!

GardenMama

That is great news. And congratulations on shifting your focus! It does take time and persistence to get to that place where we quit talking about our addicts, no matter how many times we hear it at meetings: "the focus is on YOU and not your addict." And it's great you approached a sponsor. I have really benefitted from an outside-of-a-meeting-friend. Way to shine, ShineBright! You are living up to your moniker.

laurie6781

Way to go (((((shinebright)))))

I do believe you 'saw the light', lol Good job on finding a sponsor!!

(((((julez))))) YES you can certainly interchange Coda with Alanon. Since there see to be more Alanon in your area, go try a few.

Love and hugs,

blueholly

Shine,
I don't think we even have meetings in my very small town....

EverHopeful721

Congratulations, shinebright!! Wonderful news - so glad for you!! (((HUGS)))

dollydo

Good for you! Positive post!

shinebright7

Thanks all! I felt so much better all day and went to another Al Anon meeting tonight. Question up for discussion was whose body, mind, and soul am I nourishing?

I was happy to be able to answer today that it was MINE for some of the reasons I mentioned above also some others too. :-)

It's been a good day in my world. <3