angel1018

Hello...I need some advice here. Quick overview....my boyfriend has been in rehab for 2 months now for painkiller addiction. Passing all drug tests/doing great in rehab/2 to 3 meetings a week and his counselor says he's doing great.

But the past two weeks he's been edgy with me and his mom. I know he's not using bc we're together everyday. I would pick up on it ASAP. But it's almost like I'm saying all the wrong things lately and he's jumping down my throat. I'm having a tough time with this. I don't get it. It's freaking me out bc part of me is trying to figure this all out. Is he using? But he's doing great in rehab. Passing tests. Is there possibly something he can be taking that I don't know!? Is this just part of the recovery - mood swings. I seriously can't say anything right and it's absolutely killing me. Advice??? Experiences??? Is this normal ?

AnvilheadII

can he be edgy and snarky just cuz and not have it be because of drugs? he's only a couple months clean...in many ways he's not even fully "detoxed" yet - perhaps his bloodstream but not his brain or his thinking. the world is a lot different to him now without the drugs - they masked everything. now it's all real, no buffers, no escape.

can you back off a bit and focus less on him and more on YOU?

angel1018

Thanks for the reply AnvilheadII.


Everything you said makes sense. Deep down I feel that way but I guess I just need to hear from other people that this is normal behavior. It's really hard and I'm trying to go through the emotional roller coaster ride as best as I could. I don't think I have any other choice, at this point, but to just back off right now and see what happens. I do have to focus on me It's hard to get there. It's almost like I'm addicted to him and I need the recovery myself. Good days and bad. One day at a time.

CrossFox

Angel, you said It's almost like I'm addicted to him and I need the recovery myself.

Here is a good start, the a "sticky" area from the Family & Friends of Substance Abusers thread:


Friends and Family of Substance Abusers - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Lily1918

I agree with anvil. If I go a day without a ciggarette I am a raging bword to everyone. Im not saying its ok. I have a BF with about the same amount of clean time and he's in rehab and I only see him on weekends or everyother weekend and only for a few hours for this very reason. Its kinda like pms. I doubt he's fully detoxed yet. Is your guy in outpatient? most inpatient aka live in facilities don't allow visits every day. If he's being snappy maybe you should "be busy" every other day. Not only do I think it would be good for you, but if you give him the chance to kiss you he might be a little bit nicer to you when he does see you. hugs to you.