mellow

These last two days have been so rotten. It's getting really hard having to stand my ground constantly. My b/f and I had a perfectly good day on Tuesday. That was before the drinking started. He got together with his brother in law and within two hours his attitude had changed. He was grouchy, crabby and very demanding. He was being very loud and insisting that I take him someplace. I said I would as soon as I dropped off his sister then I would take him back to his place. Not good enough. He was yelling, throwing a temper tantrum, called me a name and stomped off. His sister who has seen him like this all of her life was upset because she had never seen him treat me this way and I've never seen him treat me this way. I told her not to worry about it, that she was not responsible for his behavior. I didn't see him after that. He called me Wednesday and we had plans to go out Wednesday night. A half-hour he called and canceled on me which led to a discussion. I was hurt so I went on with the plans anyway. When I got home I shut my phone off. He was upset because he couldn't get in touch with me, blah, blah. We talked about his behavior and how using intimidation to get what he wanted wasn't going to work, the louder he yells, the more stubborn I get at making sure he doesn't get his way. What has me feeling weak right now is that he called and wanted me to to buy all this food. It seems that the main provider in that household has been sick and hasn't been working so no money. However, there is always money to drink and smoke cigarettes so I told him no, that I had bills of my own, that I don't have much money and if I buy him all this food what exactly am I supposed to do for gas money to go to work until next payday, how do I buy dogfood. I stuck to my guns but I was feeling very guilty when he said I thought I could ask you for help but I guess not. Just forget it, I'll manage. These last couple of weeks have tested me over and over and over. I hope this means there is a change coming of some sort.

All of you have been supportive and without that I'm sure I would have crumbled a few times.

Mellow

Gabe

Hugs to you Mellow.
It's hard to go through all their drama with them. Good for you for standing your ground. You are not responsible for his grocery shopping. You have to make sure that you are taken care of, and that is just what you're doing.
Peace,
Gabe

Magichappens

You are taking care of yourself. That is a good thing. Remember, he is an adult. Keep the faith. Hugs, Magic

mellow

Thanks for the encouragement. I am trying to take care of myself. He made one last ditch effort to make me feel guilty. I said, "I know you are frustrated and mad right now and you are trying to pick a fight with me. You know what you are saying is not true and I'm just not going to fight with you." You know what, it worked, he never said another word about me not helping or being there for him and the evening went fine.

mellow