Momzo

Ok...not that I want to read into something, but why would he text me asking if everything is cool? It's been two weeks since he got the rest of his stuff out of garage. He asked me then if we could be friends...I said not now. So I'm thinking that's what that is about. Why would being friends make all this good? It don't! He's hurt me so much that I couldn't imagine being friends now. Why would he care to be friends anyway? I just don't understand. He never tried to make it work, now wants to make sure 'everything's cool'. Almost sounds like its all about him again.

I did text back a one word 'yes'...he then replied 'good. Just checking'...I left it at that. Just don't understand...any thoughts?

Thanks 😄

story74

IGNORE! Do not engage.

You are hurting.I am sure he is a mess/hurting BUT it won't lead to good.

Read between all the lines you want, but DO NOT ENGAGE. IGNORE! it is time for you to heal.

Momzo

Yes...you are so right 😄

dollydo

There is no logical answer, they all do unexplainable stuff. One minute they want the door closed, the next, the want it open and they love to keep others on the string...JIC, they need something. It is all about them.

You did good. Take care!

Lily1918

he's testing he waters in case he ever gets in a tight spot again. block and walk. its so hard to do

zoso77

He's an addict. This is what addicts do. And every time you find yourself asking "why?", remind yourself of those two things.

Best,
ZoSo

Vale

A common tactic,like "forgetting" something of value at someones
place......I call it an "excuse to interact".

........."No,I'm not calling you out of the blue----I have this real reason
to call you" (reclaim my belongings)

Count on it.Like Zoso said......it's what they do.

janiebluebird

Who knows...people never know what they want. He's throwing out some bait to see if you'll bite. Walk away and don't look back. The only thing you should be worrying about it taking care of yourself. If someone treated you bad then thats on them and they can live with those consequences.

Freedom1990

I found my time was much better spent focusing on my own recovery.

My sponsor used to remind me that focusing on the "why" was a way of sidetracking work on me. I was to ask myself "what do I do about it now?"

My best suggestion is no contact, and that includes not taking his phone calls and not reading his texts.

That is what I had to do with my EXAH.

Sending you hugs of support from an old gal riding out the blizzard in Kansas!

AnvilheadII

what i see is him saying "so i got all my stuff out, and you said we could still be "friends" meaning you don't want to shoot me in the eyeball" so "we're cool?" no stress from you, no stress from me, we're even?

Momzo

Good comments..thanks! I forgot about me and why I'm fighting to get me back. And no...I'm not even remotely ready to be his friend. No. Friends don't lie, manipulate, use, etc. He's not my friend!

chickady

As I am battling the same demon as you right now... I've found that just after 4 days of completely ignoring him... I have found a HUGE amount of peace!!! Every drug addict/ex drug addict I have spoken to has told me to RUN..... Although I do not want to.... They, themselves, are telling me to! It will be a sad and lonely road for them until they seek recovery! Work on your own recovery not on his now non-existent recovery!