In a fog after having a baby.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: California
Posts: 1
In a fog after having a baby.
Hi,
I am really lost, I don't know where I belong. I don't know if I am a problem drinker who has to be careful or an alcoholic. I never tried to control my drinking, I was young and wild. I have never blacked out and always knew what I was doing when drinking. I have a sensitive stomach and would vomit before I would get to that stage. I had a craving for alcohol so would drink almost every day as soon as I came home from work. Sometimes I would drink 4 and stop sometimes I would drink 7. I rarely drank more than 7 because I would vomit. I had the craving for alcohol every evening and I was depressed. I decided I wanted to stop and found my way into AA meetings. After a year in, I got 5 years of sobriety, followed by one night of drinking, and another 3 years.
Since the birth of my son 3 1/2 months ago, the cravings came back. All I do is think about drinking. A good friend passed away recently. I also know I have post partum something going on but mostly I think being at home all day with a toddler and a baby gives me too much time to think. I have a supportive husband who has never drank (Asian and unable to digest) and has never understood the drinking world. I have wonderful friends for many years who are all drinkers, some heavy some light. I am stuck in the past, I cant seem to focus on the present. What is going on right now is that I can't stop thinking of all the parties, weddings, trips and other occasions that I spent with my friends while I was sober and my friends drank. I feel I would have been happier if I was drinking. I feel like I have missed out on 10 years of life and wish I had never given up drinking. I never tried to control my drinking. I have friends who drink as much as I used to and still drink and seem very happy. I am subdued and feel alone and left out when every one else is drinking. These friends have supported me in my AA all these years and would do anything for me.
I bought a bottle of wine and have been drinking a glass here and there. My husband is unaware. After a glass I want more but I don't. I drink some tea and the craving goes away. I can't drink more because I have 2 small children to look after, where as in my single days I would have given in to myself and finished the bottle. Do non alcoholics have a craving after alcohol? I don't want to go to a meeting because I want to drink socially. Am I a problem drinker who needs to be careful or an alcoholic? I am in a fog.
Thank you for taking the time to read this, I know this is long. I really appreciate any input.
I am really lost, I don't know where I belong. I don't know if I am a problem drinker who has to be careful or an alcoholic. I never tried to control my drinking, I was young and wild. I have never blacked out and always knew what I was doing when drinking. I have a sensitive stomach and would vomit before I would get to that stage. I had a craving for alcohol so would drink almost every day as soon as I came home from work. Sometimes I would drink 4 and stop sometimes I would drink 7. I rarely drank more than 7 because I would vomit. I had the craving for alcohol every evening and I was depressed. I decided I wanted to stop and found my way into AA meetings. After a year in, I got 5 years of sobriety, followed by one night of drinking, and another 3 years.
Since the birth of my son 3 1/2 months ago, the cravings came back. All I do is think about drinking. A good friend passed away recently. I also know I have post partum something going on but mostly I think being at home all day with a toddler and a baby gives me too much time to think. I have a supportive husband who has never drank (Asian and unable to digest) and has never understood the drinking world. I have wonderful friends for many years who are all drinkers, some heavy some light. I am stuck in the past, I cant seem to focus on the present. What is going on right now is that I can't stop thinking of all the parties, weddings, trips and other occasions that I spent with my friends while I was sober and my friends drank. I feel I would have been happier if I was drinking. I feel like I have missed out on 10 years of life and wish I had never given up drinking. I never tried to control my drinking. I have friends who drink as much as I used to and still drink and seem very happy. I am subdued and feel alone and left out when every one else is drinking. These friends have supported me in my AA all these years and would do anything for me.
I bought a bottle of wine and have been drinking a glass here and there. My husband is unaware. After a glass I want more but I don't. I drink some tea and the craving goes away. I can't drink more because I have 2 small children to look after, where as in my single days I would have given in to myself and finished the bottle. Do non alcoholics have a craving after alcohol? I don't want to go to a meeting because I want to drink socially. Am I a problem drinker who needs to be careful or an alcoholic? I am in a fog.
Thank you for taking the time to read this, I know this is long. I really appreciate any input.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,368
Hi Deidre - welcome 
I think labels can be a deterrent sometimes.
I don't know what you 'are' - only you can decide that - but if you want to stop drinking and you can't, or you feel you have to hide your drinking because you find it shameful...but you can't stop...it's a problem, no matter what you call it, and I think it's great you're here thinking about what to do about it
D
I think labels can be a deterrent sometimes.
I don't know what you 'are' - only you can decide that - but if you want to stop drinking and you can't, or you feel you have to hide your drinking because you find it shameful...but you can't stop...it's a problem, no matter what you call it, and I think it's great you're here thinking about what to do about it
D
Better when never is never
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Wisconsin near Twin Cities
Posts: 1,745
I did drink during the past and all the special events and I feel like now I am missing out on life because of all the damage I have done. Sobriety is moving me in the right direction, but if only I had been able to work better at my job, or if I was able to read a book without rereading paragraphs to try and understand, or if I had been more attentive to my kids...
I consider myself and alcoholic for the simple reason that drinking caused me misery and I was unable to stop or drink normally. I have nearly 25 years of experience showing I was never able to control it. I also had the cravings and obsession for it. It simply ate up too much of my time and mental energy. I only judge my own drinking, because I am my own best example that outward appearances rarely give an accurate picture of inner turmoil.
I consider myself and alcoholic for the simple reason that drinking caused me misery and I was unable to stop or drink normally. I have nearly 25 years of experience showing I was never able to control it. I also had the cravings and obsession for it. It simply ate up too much of my time and mental energy. I only judge my own drinking, because I am my own best example that outward appearances rarely give an accurate picture of inner turmoil.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,469
It's up to you to decide whether or not you are an alcoholic, and it's not so important to give value to the label. Is drinking causing problems for you? If so, then stopping is probably a good idea. Having cravings and trying to control and hide your drinking at the moment sounds like a problem. You want to be the best Mom you can be and the best person you can be.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Originally Posted by Deirdre 
Do non alcoholics have a craving after alcohol?
I don't know if you are an alcoholic or not. But if you are and alcoholic and continue to chase the dream of drinking socially, like a "normal" drinker, then it will only get worse.
Welcome to SR.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
