Is there an "in-between" ? Not 100% alcoholic, but still a problem drinker?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 129
Is there an "in-between" ? Not 100% alcoholic, but still a problem drinker?
I've been wondering for a while. I know that I have a problem with alcohol, but I don't think I'm alcoholic...I can moderate sometimes, alcohol does cause me problems and there"s many times that I can't control my intake....but I research about alcoholism alot, and it seems that alcoholics cannot stop at 3 or 4 drinks......which confuses me, because I exhibit alot of the other signs of being an alcoholic, but I manage to control my intake...sometimes
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,320
I think there's a bell curve...and we all start at one end and move towards the other...
I'd be wary about excluding yourself out tho - there are a lot of us here, like me, who could moderate sometimes....but other times when we really needed to...no chance.
It was always down more to luck than good management, y'know?
If you've ever gotten drunk when you said you wouldn't, I think you belong here
D
I'd be wary about excluding yourself out tho - there are a lot of us here, like me, who could moderate sometimes....but other times when we really needed to...no chance.
It was always down more to luck than good management, y'know?
If you've ever gotten drunk when you said you wouldn't, I think you belong here
D
Sobriety is Traditional
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Orcas Island, Washington
Posts: 9,055
The best thing to do is to see if you can stop drinking. If you can, and find that you are not obsessed with having another drink, that's great! Maybe you'll never want another drink.
But if you say you're going to quit for a week, and at day 6, hour 23, minute 59
you're craving that first drink--then you probably have a problem. In this case, if you don't stop drinking, it is likely that at some point your alcoholism will progress and start ruining your life.
But if you say you're going to quit for a week, and at day 6, hour 23, minute 59
you're craving that first drink--then you probably have a problem. In this case, if you don't stop drinking, it is likely that at some point your alcoholism will progress and start ruining your life.
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Louisville Kentucky
Posts: 87
Originally Posted by Coldfusion 
The best thing to do is to see if you can stop drinking. If you can, and find that you are not obsessed with having another drink, that's great! Maybe you'll never want another drink.
But if you say you're going to quit for a week, and at day 6, hour 23, minute 59
you're craving that first drink--then you probably have a problem. In this case, if you don't stop drinking, it is likely that at some point your alcoholism will progress and start ruining your life.
But if you say you're going to quit for a week, and at day 6, hour 23, minute 59
you're craving that first drink--then you probably have a problem. In this case, if you don't stop drinking, it is likely that at some point your alcoholism will progress and start ruining your life.
How many times have I said to myself "Ok, Im not gonna drink for two weeks" then I'm literally giddy at the thought the two weeks passing...counting down.
Most of the time I don't make it and justify it by saying "well I will only have a few" and we all know how that goes.
Same song different alki
It's so weird, alcoholism is so universal (obviously by the amount of traffic/users this site alone recieves) yet at times it can feel so lonely. It can feel like you are just another # and every stereotypical alcoholic thing I say everyone has heard 10,000 times.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,320
Maybe it's better just to stick to basics?
ask yourself does my drinking ever cause me problems in my work my health, my relationships or in my reputation?
are these problems one offs, or on a regular basis?
do I structure my life or my social activities around drinking?
do I avoid doing things to drink instead?
if the answer to any of that is yes, then you need to decide what an appropriate response is for you
D
ask yourself does my drinking ever cause me problems in my work my health, my relationships or in my reputation?
are these problems one offs, or on a regular basis?
do I structure my life or my social activities around drinking?
do I avoid doing things to drink instead?
if the answer to any of that is yes, then you need to decide what an appropriate response is for you
D
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 129
See, I've tried that. I went to detox and went 6 weeks sober....n I liked it! But I'm back here, cos I drank agen...things are not as bad as before but I'm worried. I think I am not an alcoholic, bcsause I compare my situation to others....maybe I shouldn't do that...
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Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Bklyn. NY
Posts: 1,859
Most people without a dinking porblem, have no problems when they drink, and if they do, they stop. If that's a problem, then I'd say you have a problem. The difference between a "problem drinker' and an "alcoholic", IMO is that a problem drinker can say one day, OK, I've had enough of this crap, and be done with it. Then spend the rest of their lives drinking socially, and not getting drunk anymore. To an alcoholic like myself, that though is ludicrious.
In the basic text of AA, the book Alcoholics Anonymous I believe they offer 2 ways you can check to see if you are or not. One is to simply give it up for a year. A non alcoholic would have no problem with that. My parents have done it, my wife does it. If she has 4 drinks a year, it's a lot. The other is to try some controlled drinking and see how that works out. Go out and have just 3 or 4 drinks and stop at that. For a few nights. See what happens. If you can do it successfully a few times in a row, maybe you don't have a problem. If you get into trouble again drinking though, or wind up drunk when you have decided you didn't want to be, well....
Only you are gonna know the deal. Good luck. Either way is great. If you can drink like a "normal" person, that's great. If you can't, there's a wonderful sober life waiting for you on the other side. Lots of people here will confirm that. Regardless of how bleak the thought might seem while still drinking.
In the basic text of AA, the book Alcoholics Anonymous I believe they offer 2 ways you can check to see if you are or not. One is to simply give it up for a year. A non alcoholic would have no problem with that. My parents have done it, my wife does it. If she has 4 drinks a year, it's a lot. The other is to try some controlled drinking and see how that works out. Go out and have just 3 or 4 drinks and stop at that. For a few nights. See what happens. If you can do it successfully a few times in a row, maybe you don't have a problem. If you get into trouble again drinking though, or wind up drunk when you have decided you didn't want to be, well....
Only you are gonna know the deal. Good luck. Either way is great. If you can drink like a "normal" person, that's great. If you can't, there's a wonderful sober life waiting for you on the other side. Lots of people here will confirm that.
Regardless of how bleak the thought might seem while still drinking.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,320
I'm not convinced controlled drinking is really the best measure for those of us who still have some measure of control, Joe.
For a long time I could manage to drink 'within' limits on work nights....I took that to mean I had no problem, despite the way I wrote myself off on weekends.
worst. conclusion. ever.
I'm all for the abstinence proposal tho - give it up for 3 months Carly, and I think you should see whether it's a problem or not
D
but I manage to control my intake...sometimes
worst. conclusion. ever.
I'm all for the abstinence proposal tho - give it up for 3 months Carly, and I think you should see whether it's a problem or not
D
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Minneapolis
Posts: 210
Originally Posted by dee74
maybe it's better just to stick to basics?
Ask yourself does my drinking ever cause me problems in my work my health, my relationships or in my reputation? No
are these problems one offs, or on a regular basis? One off
do i structure my life or my social activities around drinking?no
do i avoid doing things to drink instead? No
if the answer to any of that is yes, then you need to decide what an appropriate response is for you
d
Ask yourself does my drinking ever cause me problems in my work my health, my relationships or in my reputation? No
are these problems one offs, or on a regular basis? One off
do i structure my life or my social activities around drinking?no
do i avoid doing things to drink instead? No
if the answer to any of that is yes, then you need to decide what an appropriate response is for you
d
Member
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Bklyn. NY
Posts: 1,859
Originally Posted by Dee74
I'm not convinced controlled drinking is really the best measure for those of us who still have some measure of control, Joe.
This is why I'd never make a good big book thumper.
Keeping it simple!
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Surrey, BC
Posts: 3,282
I know my drinking definately progessed the longer I drank. Yeah there was a time I could have one drink and call it a day. Not anymore. If I have one drink, that is it, I won't stop.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Louisville Kentucky
Posts: 87
I know each alcoholics intake varies, but at least for me...when I sit back and think about it I know I have a problem when "controlling" it means only having 8-12 beers.
wtf lol.
As if that is a productive night or something
wtf lol.
As if that is a productive night or something
Sobriety is Traditional
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Orcas Island, Washington
Posts: 9,055
Originally Posted by LadyinBC
I know my drinking definately progessed the longer I drank. Yeah there was a time I could have one drink and call it a day. Not anymore. If I have one drink, that is it, I won't stop.
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Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: CA desert
Posts: 1,599
Instead of wondering if the label of alcoholic fit me, and struggling with it for decades, I finally had to look at things totally different in order to see that change was absolutely necessary for my life. I had to consider what, if anything, did alcohol add to my life? I tried to consider social lubrication, smooth talking with the ladies, hanging with the guys during the game, and I still came up short in comparison to all the damage my consumption of booze had caused over all the years. Also, I had to consider all the lost opportunities, wasted talent, wasted brain cells, and efforts to get drunk instead of efforts to help myself and other people.
Then, most importantly, I had to decide if I wanted anymore of the same in my life today?
That proved to be the key, for it didn't matter if I was alcoholic, or not, it only mattered if I wanted more of the same consequences from drinking that I'd already had in my life. Thank goodness the answer then and now is no.
Then, most importantly, I had to decide if I wanted anymore of the same in my life today?
That proved to be the key, for it didn't matter if I was alcoholic, or not, it only mattered if I wanted more of the same consequences from drinking that I'd already had in my life. Thank goodness the answer then and now is no.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,746
I'd say if you come on to a site like this and have to ask yourself if you have a 'problem', then you probably do. Why not give it up for a month or three and see how you like it. If it's no problem giving it up then maybe you don't have a problem. Give sobriety a try.
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