seek

I have been searching and searching for positive forums or sisterhood or women's forums - can anyone recommend any such forums?

I have things in common with people on this forum, but the focus is mostly negative and I NEED to focus on positive stuff, for my own healing and well-being.

Thank you for any recommendations!

LifeRecovery

Seek-

I don't always know how to answer the questions you pose. I feel like if you think this forum is negative why would you ask our opinion? It really makes me sad how "short" I often feel when I respond to you.

I am not trying to be mean with that statement, I sincerely struggle with that. I feel like I am a hopeful person and try to only share appropriately my experience, strength and hope in a positive way.

On the Reiki thread started in the last 10 days you commented on how the individual asking might not get support here for example. I feel like while not all of us, many of us are doing a lot of out of the box things, and that we are overall supportive of whatever might work. I am truly sorry that you feel that way about us, and that we have missed our mark in our support.

I have not looked for support online with woman's groups, but have found some that are very supportive in person with dream groups, and woman's groups in town. Actually I have gotten a lot of support from book clubs over the years (even if the focus is not on support). Actually after the Reiki discussion I looked into stuff in the area and found some meetings similar to what Paperdolls posted about. There is a holistic magezine published every quarter just north of where I live that has been helpful in pointing me in the right direction.

I am curious to hear what others have to say as I think that would be exciting to consider.

seek

I didn't mean my post as a criticism - It was not a passive-aggressive comment to try to change THIS forum. I think this forum obviously serves a purpose to people, but I NEED a place where the focus is on health and healing - not trauma and despair.

I am also sorry you were offended by my comment on the Reiki thread - the person actually got good support, so my assessment was incorrect. I thought that because the focus is 12 step - and 12 step derives from traditional religious concepts (AA was originally going to be "James" something, I understand, but I digress) . . .Anyway, I thought since this group is based on 12 steps that probably only 1 out of 100 would even be aware of Reiki . . .

I was thinking that since there are so many people on this thread and that most people are aware of other internet forums, that this might be a good place to ask if people have other favorite forums that might suit me better (forums that are focused strictly on health and well-being, women's support groups, etc.) I have found a hand-full of such forums, but they are not active or there are a bunch of weirdos (meaning some real nutty troublemakers) . . .so I was just sincerely asking. I am sorry if I offended you, but consider yourself lucky if this group is just your cup of tea. I am looking for just my cup of tea . . . a place where I can write about vision boards, my hopes and dreams, the healing modalities I am doing at the moment (EFT Personal Peace Procedure) - my current challenges with PTSD, my lack of human support, etc.

I can't be the only person in the world who has holistic interests and no support.

Thank you for commenting.

ReflectingOnMe

Personally I dont know of any...this is the first time I have ever joined a forum and that was by googling "break up with alcoholic boyfriend".

What interests you? I have seen gaming forums (in ads). Art forums (think through delphi website I think).
Divorce forums...parenting forums.. online book forums, business forums (shrm).

ReflectingOnMe

Hmm have you tried googling holistic healing forum? Worth a shot anyway. Hope you find a good one!

m1k3

Seek, this is NOT a 12 step forum. Using myself I attend al-Anon, have no sponsor and do not do the steps. I use a meditation practice which is a mix of Buddhism and Taoism but am not a Buddhist or Taoist. I am also ordained in the Church of the Latter Day Dude, for real!

They are many here including long timers who do not attend al-Anon. This is simply a support forum for those who's lives have been affected by loving an alcoholic.

Try starting a few positive thoughts and healing threads and see what sort of response you get. I know I would be interested.

BTW, I love discussing different types of meditation and things like brain neuroplasticity.

Your friend, The Reverend

seek

I have been told many times this is a 12 step forum and I think it says so somewhere . . .

I have started a few threads on healing and health - and I was basically talking to myself.

I would be interested in hearing what you might have to say about the subjects that interest you.

I am interested in Feng Shui, vision boards, positive affirmations, the ascension, vibrations and frequencies, quantum physics, aromatherapy, essential oils, massage, Reiki, dreamwork, art as a healing modality, gardening, toning, chanting, sound healing, incense, saging, smudging, praying, archangels, astrology, numerology, gateways, portals, parallel universes, relativity of time, karma, sacred mantras, crystals, organic foods, how to raise your vibration, etc.

LaTeeDa

Hey reverend Mike! I just finished reading "My Stroke of Insight" by Jill Bolte-Taylor. What a fascinating book. I thought I would mention it because you brought up brain neuroplasticity. The thing that struck me about the book is that all the things she says are a way to peace are the same things that Buddhism, Eckhart Tolle, The Tao, Deepak Chopra, and even Alanon suggest. Self-awareness, being in the present moment, breathing, loving compassion, gratitude, etc. In fact, as a self confessed self-help junkie, I have read dozens of books over the past 7 years, and the thing that I noticed most was how many of them say the same thing--but in different ways. This latest book reinforces all that philosophical stuff with actual science. Fanscinating!

Anyway, if you haven't seen it, here is her Ted Talk which got me so interested I bought her book!

Jill Bolte Taylor's stroke of insight | Video on TED.com

Seek, I hope this is appropriate for what you were looking for. If not, sorry for the hijack.

L

PohsFriend

Lol... This forum has some down days but there are a few obnoxiously irrepressible optimists around who need a little positivity.... At least I've heard there are a couple ;-)

Ok seek, time to see if I can make you laugh...

BAD DAY ON RECOVERY FORUM:

OP: Well guys, it's been tough lately but good news... I just hit a 23 Million jackpot in the lotto!
Reply one: ....uh-oh, your STBXAHGDMF is gonna claim half then head to Vegas!
Reply two: he will only get 1/4, the government will take half
Reply three: no, he will only get 1/8... Cash option pays about half the jackpot, so you and he will get 1/8 each... Then he'll pick up Charlie Sheen's 'Goddesses' on the way
Reply four: yeah... Then he will post pictures on Facebook with a bunch of whores... But he won't go to a meeting while he's there.
Original Poster: FML!
Pohsfriend: arcane, somewhat politically incorrect smartass remark....

Then nothing... Because seek wont be around to day "Ok, that **** was funny!, lighten up guys"

Let me know if that didn't get at least a giggle... I will work on something better.

seek

Good work. You got a muffled chortle out of me on the remark about posting pics on FB.

My sense of humor has been SERIOUSLY impacted by this alcoholism ****!

m1k3

I think one of the things missing in a lot of these types of discussions, besides humor , is the mythic element. Something I read one time said the importance of fairy tales is not to teach children that there are no such things as monsters, but that they can be beaten.

Now, on to the humor.

The difference between an optimist and a pessimist is that an optimist believes we are living in the best of all possible worlds and the pessimist is afraid he's right.

Your friend, the Revrend

seek

I think it is very helpful to think of things from an archetypal perspective. I love Jungian work for that reason.

And it gives me hope to have the space to reframe things and say (about my grandson for instance) that he is on a Hero's Journey - he is climbing mountains, slaying dragons, going into the underworld, etc.

Now if I can find a nice mythological standpoint for myself, that would be helpful.

It would be great if those of us who resonate at a different level than the strictly materialistic "what you see is all there is" and "the whole world is a big problem" and "my life sucks," then we might be able to help each other reframe things - and not be so identified with each horrible thing that appears to be happening . . . I really need to be able to understand things from a broader sense.

m1k3

Right now I am dealing from a Tibetian Buddhist standpoint. I am dealing with an angry demon and a hungry ghost. The angry demon is me and I'm slowly learning that it is OK to be angry. Both my wife and FOO have done me harm. I grew up in a house where the only valid emotions belonged to my alcoholic father and my Codie mother. Then I married someone whose emotions became the only valid ones. That left me to a large degree feeling that my emotions were invalid.

The hungry ghost is my AW. She still wants to drain whatever she can from me, much like a vampire.

The thing is that I am learning to accept myself as I am and I can use my angry demon to set myself free from her.

I may never be normal but I can learn to accept myself as I am. And that is a huge victory for me and my angry demon.

Your friend, the Revrend Angry Demon,

marie1960

Seek, I have a couple of good old friends, my best friend and I have got 50 years under our belt, there is nothing finer than a group of good friends, chatting over coffee, cake, a boardgame, or sitting on the beach reading books together, teasing each other, or griping and complaining about absolutely nothing, flipping coins to see who has to go start the grill, who is gonna cook, and who is going to clean up.......

Hope I do not offend you, but it sounds like you just need some girlfriends........ seems the more time I spend with others, sharing, and caring about others, the less aches and pains I have..... or maybe I still have all those aches and pains, but I accept them, because my girlfriends have them too, or it's just part of the natural aging process.

In my book, laughter and friendship will remain the best medicine for what ails us.

seek

I resonate with Tibetan Buddhist ideas myself, as well as Taoism (studied Process Work, which derived from it for years).

As far as friends are concerned, I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE GIRLFRIENDS . . .I just don't know anyone right now that is emotionally available (speaking of emotions - and I am another one who was not allowed to have them in my family of origin or more traumatizing to me, in the family I created. My children have no tolerance for my emotions and my thoughts don't count for much, either.

But friends would be awesome. And I do make a good friend. I am just an introvert and old now, so it is difficult to meet unconventional (not cookie cutter) people - and people who have serious family problems - that's another issue that a lot of people don't like to talk about - AND (before someone mentions it) I don't want to go to Alanon - I went for six years and am sick of the ugly rooms (beauty is important to me) and the conventional, by-the-book cliche ideas and axioms . . .just not into it anymore.

marie1960

Seek, I know you are a reader, so have you thought of joining a book club at your local library? It would be a step towards making new acquaintances, what about joining a civic organization for women, or join a charity organization, at the very least you all share the same focus....... What about a dance class? a little salsa may lift your spirits. Music always takes me to a better place.

Think back to what you used to enjoy doing,( before your grandson's addiction took over your life) and really try to recapture yourself.


I think You are intelligent, witty, and perhaps alittle eccentric ( in a good way) and I think you would be a fine friend, friend?

seek

I have a lot of introverted hobbies - like writing, blogging, gardening, studying stuff, doing art projects, etc.

The book club idea is ok - but I tend to be too unconventional for most of the people I meet . . .and I am not a lover of fiction anymore . . .

But as for the idea about getting back to me - I have to go way back, before I had kids - I was just thinking how "trouble free" my life was before I had kids - never had any serious problems - nothing traumatizing or seemingly insurmountable - nothing HORRIBLE - just run of the mill issues like the car won't start - not that so-and-so is drunk out of his mind and who-knows-what-will-happen-next . . .

I am trying (that is why I want the POSITIVE FORUM) to recreate myself without this terrible problem - I REJECT THIS PROBLEM - I AM SICK OF THIS PROBLEM - THIS PROBLEM WILL CEASE TO EXIST!!! I MAY HAVE A BURIAL CEREMONY FOR THIS PROBLEM.

seek

On the fiction . . .I used to love fiction . . . for the past few years I have been giving all of the classical fiction to my grandson so that he could have that wonderful basis . . .I wonder if I would be able to go back and reread some of the classics I once loved. It is a good idea.

The group that I heard of that sounds fun is a discussion group of a TV show - I just heard that as a concept and it appealed to me.

Seren

I don't have time at the moment to pursue any of my hobbies, but I suppose I would start there. I'd probably look for a knitting or crocheting group (fiber therapy is never stressful!) or maybe some sort of DIY home improvement group - if there are such things.

If you have a specific spiritual practice, then perhaps there is a women's group for that.

Good luck in your search!

LifeRecovery

Seek-

For me SR is a part of my recovery. I have many parts. I was not offended by the posts, I am just not always sure how to respond, and right now naming that is important to me.

The rest of the parts of my recovery have included
I do Hakomi therapy every week (body centered therapy), which has a mindfullness basis.

I am also in training for Hakomi certification (though I am not a therapist). I am considering going back to school for therapy work.

I do Rolfing monthly, a type of body work.

I do Al-Anon at least weekly.

I have a fear aggressive dog who I have had to do a lot of work with, she is my LifeRecovery dog which has included regular training and work on myself for her to be safe in the world.

I have tried Tension Releasing Exercises (group format) which I enjoyed, a meditation course, which I LOVED. I was fortunate to be able to participate in Equine therapy group which I also enjoyed. I have joined a knitting/crocheting group affliliating with a church which I don't participate in, but the people are lovely.

I live in a very conservative place, and don't always connect with people here. I am fortunate that just over the boarder has many of these pieces but there is traveling involved as a result. I have done better with it recently when I realize that I need the place I live for work, but have other needs I can't meet here.