cmhcali

Hi I just read through my old post from his relapse 3 years ago and towards the end I was so much stronger. Able to block his calls, emails, ect and go no contact. I want to get there again but at the moment my motives are wrong for wanting that. I want to make him get better. I KNOW I AM POWERLESS. I just need to let the lies out of my head. I did post earlier that I am going to an alanon or naranon meeting. I know I need to keep going there every week to get strength. It just stinks when it is tough in the moment.

Kindeyes

As you sure your motives are wrong? Perhaps you are trying to protect yourself? But there may be that idea in the back of your brain saying "if I do this maybe he'll get better" but the foremost thought in your mind is that YOU are sick and tired of being sick and tired. I think that's normal.

We, just like the addict, get better when we make it a priority in our lives. Kudos to you for getting to meetings. Make your own recovery a priority and you'll feel better.....that is the promise of any 12 step program.

gentle hugs
ke

Anaya

cmhcali: So sorry you're feeling down. It's very positive that you are continuing with meetings and coming here to share.

I know how it feels to lose spirit and the will to forge ahead and then end up falling back. But know that we are here for you and cheer you on.