the revolving door
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 1,618
the revolving door
I haven't posted in awhile. ABF has been staying with me for about a month now. He goes in to salvation army tomorrow. He has abstained from heroin for two weeks, and I let him lock himself up in my bedroom kick. It felt like that scene from riding in cars with boys. Im grateful for 30 days no contact, I apparently don't want to break free on my own. He wants to know If I will visit him....
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
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I was a little confused by your post but glad to hear that he's getting into the SA-ARC. They do a great job if a person is highly motivated but they have LOTS of rules and not a lot of tolerance for those who break them. They definitely do what is in the interest of helping the greatest number. I hope your bf will do well there. It's a great opportunity.
How are YOU doing?
gentle hugs
ke
How are YOU doing?
gentle hugs
ke
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Join Date: Nov 2012
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not well. I've read the books and been in Al anon for quite some time but I just have a hard time putting words into action. Im angry at myself for the things I've done and feel like yoda was right "do or do not" and lately I've been doing not. :l
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Over here.
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i love yoda!! stick to your guns, lily...maybe you'll realize with time without him that you can do this. i imagine when mine gets out and goes to treatment--soon, please, i hope...soon!--that i will be able to do the same. sometimes we need circumstances to force our hands. whatever way it happens....
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Lily
No matter how long we've been working a program, we all have setbacks. There are days when I feel great, I'm "doing it right" and there are other days that I feel like a total screwup. I'm obsessing or fragmented or future tripping......but it feels so awful that it helps me get rewired the right way--and I'm back to a more serene existence again.
Please know that we'll walk with you....on the good days and the bad days. You're not alone.
gentle hugs
ke
No matter how long we've been working a program, we all have setbacks. There are days when I feel great, I'm "doing it right" and there are other days that I feel like a total screwup. I'm obsessing or fragmented or future tripping......but it feels so awful that it helps me get rewired the right way--and I'm back to a more serene existence again.
Please know that we'll walk with you....on the good days and the bad days. You're not alone.
gentle hugs
ke
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 462
Lily we all have to find our own rock bottom. we sometimes think we found it, only to find that we were just lying to ourselves. you will know when you have had enough, for you will actually do something about it, that is just for you.
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Originally Posted by Jody675 
now the hard part....not to let him back in!
I'm no angel!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
" His mother is furious with me for not letting him stay. I told her it was none of her business."
Let her take him in.
Keep your resolve, he is a big boy, the ball is in his court, keep it there.
Let her take him in.
Keep your resolve, he is a big boy, the ball is in his court, keep it there.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 1,618
Originally Posted by dollydo
" His mother is furious with me for not letting him stay. I told her it was none of her business."
Let her take him in.
Keep your resolve, he is a big boy, the ball is in his court, keep it there.
Let her take him in.
Keep your resolve, he is a big boy, the ball is in his court, keep it there.
I'm no angel!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
"His dad refuses, he has been in recovery for 30 years, and has got tough love down to a science. Me and mom are the enablers."
Good for Dad, maybe you and mom need to go to meetings, and if you haven't done so...read Codependent No More by Melodie Beattie.
Good for Dad, maybe you and mom need to go to meetings, and if you haven't done so...read Codependent No More by Melodie Beattie.
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well, he hooked me back in, said the bag was old and stomped to the bathroom and drug tested himself. He was clean, and of course, I let him crash on the couch. He went into the SAARC on Thursday. Im angry at myself because I miss him, happy because he is clean, frustrated because I see so much good in him, and hopeful he will remain sober after treatment, and upset because I know that many don't..... and kicking myself in the teeth for being a lovesick school girl, checking my phone, even though he cant call, and checking the mail, even though I know its too soon for a letter. Im trying to adjust, and its hard. thanks for reading
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Originally Posted by dollydo
"His dad refuses, he has been in recovery for 30 years, and has got tough love down to a science. Me and mom are the enablers."
Good for Dad, maybe you and mom need to go to meetings, and if you haven't done so...read Codependent No More by Melodie Beattie.
Good for Dad, maybe you and mom need to go to meetings, and if you haven't done so...read Codependent No More by Melodie Beattie.
I hope you are doing ok.
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