someonelikeyou1

Hi, today is the day that I'm first going to confront my father to see what his reaction is when I ask him if he thinks mom has a drinking problem. I guess I'm kinda paralized untill I see his reaction. I know this can go so many ways. My mother is a closet drinker. I have found hiden bottles around the house. I can tell when I talk to her on the phone which really drives me crazy. My mom is in her early 70's and my dad to, however he still works 3 days a week so he is not with her, but he has to know. Wish me luck.

Dee74

hi and welcome someonelikeyou1

Just be aware that confronting someone isn't always like interventions you see in movies where the alcoholic cries and commits to quitting and turns their life around from that moment.

I really wish it could be that way, but it's often not.

I'm an alcoholic.
I was confronted.

I got angry, smashed things up, and cut those people out of my life.

I hope your experience is a better one.

You should check out our Family and Friends forum too - there's a lot of wisdom experience and support there too

Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

D

Xune

What is your plan of action if your father;

1) Denies
2) Admits
3) Down plays
4) Gets angry at you

...among the many, many other different reactions.

What is your game plan? I don't have a game plan for you, just food for thought...seeing as you've posted on a public forum.

sugarbear1

What are your motives for this?

Anna

I agree with all of the above.

Why are you doing this? It may go very badly and not end up the way you hope. I was furious when I was confronted and I completely shut-down and closed myself off to everyone.

someonelikeyou1

Well I have to say my father did know. He said he was going to talk with her first, I just hope that he really understand what is going on. I'm waiting to hear from him. Why does anyone have to be comfronted? You worry that they are going to kill themself driving or worse kill someone else. The last time I witness her in the parking lot of the ABC store she was talking to some man. My mom doesn't talk to people that she doesn't know. She is first person to worry that someone is going to harm her or take her car,purse ect. My whole family is willing to do what ever it take to try and get her help. I know it is going to be hard, but it harder to act like everything is alright.

MIRecovery

Everybody that was anybody wanted me to quit but it was not until I was ready to quit that anything could be done.

If she is not ready to confront her problem your best efforts will go no where. That does not mean you should not try but just to set your expectations accordingly.

sugarbear1

You could try a family intervention with a knowledgeable interventionist. I suggest NOT doing it without someone who knows how to do it. That way, you'll know you did something, then leave it in your mother's hands and step away.