gemini rebel

I am trying to look at people with a different attitude and notice my reaction. I've always believed when you have a problem with someone to talk to them so ya'll can work thru it. Now I'm confused with this.....it seems that I've NEEDED acceptance constantly from the people around me, stems from my gawky teenage years along with the lack of self-worth within my homelife. It bothers me when I think someone doesn't like me. When I feel a wall between me and someone else I wonder what's wrong and WANT to work thru it (fix it? lol), is this something I should let go and let GOD? After all I don't remember anything I may have said or done to have this person treat me as such....so perhaps this is their problem. That's when the ole hamster wheel starts creaking and I can get it rocking and rolling really fast and cause myself alot of stress.....over what? So I'm turning to my HP and asking for guidance and waiting.

Thru Al-Anon I'm learning that I can't control how or what the other person thinks (like I ever actually could) and I NEED TO LET IT GO and move on.
I am so glad that Al-Anon is around for me, all I know is that little hamster better start packing his bags cause he's about to get an eviction notice.

Thanks for giving me a place to share my thoughts knowing I won't be judged.

smoke gets in my eyes

I like that hamster wheel image Rebel. We could have t-shirts made: "Higher Power not Hamster Power". You're sounding liberated. That's great!

Hugs,
Smoke

Magichappens

Hey Gemini,
When it's someone else's wall, it's their choice whether to take it down. I too believe in working things out when possible, but when someone else choses to keep that from happening, I try to let it go. People have their reasons for this, most of the time I try not to take it personally. Sounds like you are doing some real soul searching. I have found so much more joy in life by searching and applying spiritual principles. Life is good. This forum is good. Hugs, Magic

DefofLov

I am learning to let go of people who are bad for me too and I no longer care about other people's opinions of me. If someone truly wants to get to know me, that is great, if they dont and want to pass judgement screw them. I no longer go through a rollercoaster ride of emotions. Each day I am learning more and more about what type of people I would appreciated having in my life. Good for you and your liberation, beat yourself up over other people's actions no longer.

Good luck and God bless,

~Def

McKrazy

I've had more than enough opinions thrown at me that were not based on truth, other than what's on the side of the bottle. So just this week I asked four dear and close friends to give me their honest impressions of me, weaknesses and strengths. I just felt like I needed to work outside of my warped self-perception and my A's. I needed to see me through eyes who care about me and my own growth. I've heard back from one. It's been an amazing process, and they are definitely people I trust to give me what I can deal with. I think It matters WHOSE opinion. And mine is as warped as his, so I need some point of departure.

quietsins

isnt it amazing as our self esteem returns how much easier it gets day to day to turn things over to your hp? as our clarity returns about our real self worth.. we realize that in many cases.. those who are judging us or are harsh to us.. are much unhappier than we are.

sounds like you are growing.. and growth hurts a bit.. but no flowers blossom without reaching for the sun... consider yourself reaching for that sunshine in your soul

Dutch

It is amazing how Al-Anon has helped me gain my self esteem. This has carried over to the work place. I am now down to only 48 to 50 hours of work a week. It used to be the boss would ask "Can you do this?" I'd reply "Sure." Then I wouldn't be home till midnight. Now I say "I'm working ten hours days. What do you want me to work on next this or that?"

How liberating not to have to worry about what others think. I actually believe my bosses have more respect me for now that I have set a few boundries.

gemini rebel

Thank you all for your support....."Liberating" never thought of it like that....thank you for the word.